Why do i even try anymore . I am in pain i cant keep living like this. Overdosing on pills or hanging myself dont work at all!
I give up i can’t keep going on like this . I am invisible to the whole world and i cant take it anymore. I realy want to blow my brains out and just sleep forever !
Tag:
in pain
I’m so sick of not being able to go through with it! I can’t stand this pain anymore. I’m going insane and if and when I manage to get pain meds I’m not responsible. I just don’t want to feel anything. But that doesn’t last long and most of the month I’m left with nothing and screaming my head off! No one will help me. Government won’t help me, doctors won’t help me, E.R. won’t help me. I have legitimate reasons to have pain meds. I was born this way, I didn’t do it to myself. I just want to die!
I have nothing and no […]
It’s only been a couple of weeks since we stopped talking and it already feels like months. I feel so lonely now, but overall it’s easier this way. I think about the things that happened a bit less all the time, and I’m not waiting for your emails. But I still think about you every day. I miss the things you said so much. I think about everything bad that happened, and all the reasons our relationship was crumbling away, why it ended and why I shouldn’t get back in touch with you. And I remember all the things you said when we first met. […]
To Angela
Angela, this may be the last letter I write to you. I guess my time here is up. I’m sorry for everything… I didn’t mean to lie to you. This life is no fairy tale. This life is not a garden of sweet roses… rather, it is an fearful enigma of pain and sorrow. I thought that I could save you… give you happiness once and for all… but I am merely just a fantasy. I am fake. And though I have reached the crevice where I couldn’t reach out to you and pull you close to my chest again, but I need you […]
This is the last fucking straw! I can’t get a known slum lord to rent to me because of my credit and my name change from a female name to a male name is surely the trigger that set him off, but he had already decided against renting to me before he even got my application. He didn’t look at anything. He just knew he didn’t want some freak there.
I’m too fat and ugly to ever be loved, laid, or even be accepted as a roommate. I’m destined to be homeless and alone and no one has any fucking idea what it’s like to be […]
This year has probably been the worst year of my life.
I have suffered from anxiety since i was little, and i dont remember a time without it.
however, disregarding that, i feel like no matter how much i try to be happy, happiness turns against me, or life or the universe.
the beginning of this year was great, i had great friends, a loving boy friend, a loving family.
then after coming back from a (what i though was a) perfect holiday with my then boyfriend in june everything just turnt to crap, it has been a downward spiral.
My grandad fell ill and […]
Sometimes when I think about ending my life I find it beautiful in a way. I think it is because I feel that my life would finally make sense. All these past years of dealing with emotional pain would finally make sense. I just was not destined to live. I am so sick of being in pain, confused, not being able to think clearly about anything anymore. Thinking about ending it all makes me feel like my life would finally be… complete.
I was born with bad health and I’ve gone to doctors all my life, but they refuse to help me for long. All of the health conditions I have conflict with each other too much. My main are Interstitial Cystitis, Shy Bladder Syndrome, Type 1 Diabetes, Gastrointestinal, Heart condition (my main blood artery was blocked so I didn’t get the proper blood flow)… I’m in excruciating pain and it’s gotten worse in the last 3 years. I finally managed to get pain killers, but on March of this year this clinic has been fighting me. 3 times I was forced to go cold turkey and […]
I feel like i should die. I just hate being around my family they kept taling me granted. They think i m just acting i m ill even afate doc said i cant be able to go clg bcz of spodalytis. My omly brother its a play fir me , he never get that i m still in pain i need his support they just avoid like i m nothing for them.
by Sampada
written by Sampada
I am a 23 year old guy and I have been diagnosed with a chronic autoimmune condition called lupus. What this means is that my immune system finally caught up with my brain and started hating itself as much as I did before I even knew what the word “lupus” meant. My body is destroying itself and if I choose to keep living, I will live every day for the rest of my life in pain with the looming threat of facing severe organ damage or becoming permanently bedridden. Having lupus means that something as innocent as spending 2 minutes in the sun could cause my immune system to […]
why must i live only to be hit.
why must my life always be in pain.
why does no one care when they see this kind of thing?
why is it that when people see the buses they laugh and stare?
why does no one care what happens to me? why does everyone think its funny?
is it because you hear and see it on the news everyday a father who is drunk punches his child and gets a way with it i tryed getting help only to be told you are a lier and a sinner thats why you deserve it. i walk alone on […]
I’m going to try to not make this as long as it was going to be before.
To summarize my problem: I have spent every day of my life almost all the time thinking about why I do what I do and how I feel about any given thing. Imagining every experience I can and trying to gain and understanding of how everyone else feels about anything. All I have ever wanted in life, as many people do, was someone who saw value in me.
The problem is because I have such an insanely high level of understanding for other people, they can’t trick me at all. […]
I got frustrated watching the Sopranos last night because the characters were acting stupid. My anger at these fictional people once again reminded me of how empty my life is. I recently came to the realization that I don’t actually have any friends. My co-workers only care about what I have to say if it’s entertaining and won’t hang out with me after hours. The friends that I do see in my spare time only ever want to do stuff once every 3 or 4 months. The guy that I considered my best friend is little more than an acquaintance. I’ve told him so much […]
What are things anti suicide people say to you that piss you off the most?
by wndozh8er
written by wndozh8er
I been suicidal for over a decade. I talked about it often with people but luckily was never institutionalized. Here are some of the things people said that got under my skin –
1. “Give your life over to God” – ok first off I’m a hardcore atheist so that doesn’t work. I was also severely depressed and miserable as a Christian as well so going back wouldn’t change a god damn thing.
2. “If you commit suicide, you will go to hell” – wow really? Is God that evil as to torture someone for all eternity because they wanted there sufering to end? Again I don’t […]
I know it’s recommeneded to not give out your name, but honestly right now I need a friend. I need someone. Anyone. I feel hopeless, broken beyond repair. My name Is James.
I’ve tried to die multiple times now. Times where I just snapped and gave in, others where I couldn’t take the pain anymore. I couldn’t take the abuse and the bullying. It’s left me completely broken. I thought it wouldn’t get worse.. But it got much much worse..
Lately my whole life has been destroyed. I let myself love again..and It only ended in pain. I let someone get too close..told them things about me […]
Damn, in the last couple months I have been: fired, arrested, evicted, quit opiates cold turkey, and whatever else has gone wrong. Despite it all I’m doing alright. Working 16hrs. a day processing fish making good money. Free room and board and have made a bunch of awesome friends. Me and the homie went to look at apartments today and to look for permanent jobs. Life could be worse for me is all I’m saying, and I know it is worse for many of you. I’m sorry if you are in pain. All I can say is when life gives you lemons make lemonade, and […]
I have been suicidal for as long as I remember. I’ve had 2 suicide attempts…both with pill,s both failures. I’m always in pain. I’m always sick. I hate myself. I can’t keep a job. I have no friends….
But I was doing better. I’ve been seeing a therapist for almost a year now. I’ve had my current job for almost a year. I wasn’t happy, but I was close. Until July 4th. My Grandma passed away. We all knew it was coming. She was ready. She’d had Alzheimer’s for so long. I was close to her as a little girl. I spent my childhood at […]
Everyday I feel like killing myself a little more.
I keep my emotions bottled up now, biting my lip until I draw blood when I want to show emotion. It kills me inside to know that I’m getting closer to my death.
Honestly, the only reason I haven’t killed myself yet, is because of my friends on Quotev, music and because I would never leave my sister in all of this misery we go through.
I wish I had grown up differently, seen things differently, learned things differently. Though here I am.
If you think about it, it’s kind of funny. It’s funny how when we were little, we […]
I wish I knew what was wrong with me. I don’t know if I will ever be consistently happy. I’m changing into somebody I don’t like. There’s not much emotion anymore. I’ve become much more logical, pragmatic. I still suck at doing work, so it hasn’t made me any better at school, but I’m just not emotional about things anymore. I’ve become terse with my parents and girlfriend, less caring and more calculating. I’m losing something, me, and I don’t know why. I don’t know how to comfort anyone, or the right things to say. I can’t really empathize. Without a passion, what my purpose? […]