I figured since this is where we met that it’s only fitting that I write you something beautiful here. Everything comes full circle and I pray that as I let you go – you will come back to me at the right time. I do love you but you are in love with someone else. You say you still love me but your heart is in his hands right now. I hold onto you in an unhealthy way right now. I hold onto parts of my past for comfort and security instead of setting my sights on the limitless possibilities ahead of me. My […]
Tag:
in the
There are moments when even to the sober eye of reason, the world of our sad humanity may assume the semblance of Hell…
by KH
written by KH
The title above is a quote by Edgar Allan Poe – one of my favourite writers, and if you haven’t read any of his works yet I highly recommend it!
Ive been reading through his Complete Tales and Poems recently and honestly I’ve never enjoyed myself more. His writing is beautiful, and the words come alive as you read them.
Anyways, the point of this little note is to say that Hell is already in the world in humanity itself. It is a tragic thing but it is logical in the sense that humanity is the worst and best thing to happen in this planet; so corruption […]
Everyone always gives me such weird looks whenever I talk or do something. I just say stuff, it’s a constant stream of shit. All because of my anxiety, talking just saying anything is a coping mechanism. People think I’m fucked in the head and they’re right. My actions are also mainly from anxiety, me constantly freaking out and just doing/saying different things because I don’t know any other way to cope except for drugs and self-harm and they’re probably not too good(?). I think I’m gonna flip out tomorrow, I can feel it, it’s not going to be a good day. I kinda feel like […]
I just got hit with a wave of emotion. I am really hard on myself, it started with spending too much money, then beating myself up, then calling myself a piece of shit. Then in the afternoon today I thought I haven’t spoken to anyone all day. I feel really alone, my life is a mess I don’t see any way out. I need work , I need to get off this small amount of opiates. I need some thing, I need total change but I don’t think its going to happen. I’ve lost every thing to live for and might have to give away […]
Everyday I feel like killing myself a little more.
I keep my emotions bottled up now, biting my lip until I draw blood when I want to show emotion. It kills me inside to know that I’m getting closer to my death.
Honestly, the only reason I haven’t killed myself yet, is because of my friends on Quotev, music and because I would never leave my sister in all of this misery we go through.
I wish I had grown up differently, seen things differently, learned things differently. Though here I am.
If you think about it, it’s kind of funny. It’s funny how when we were little, we […]
why do so many people in the spring of their life want to die?
by cathy arsis
written by cathy arsis
I know a part of it is lack of latitude, perspective, and maturity…another mitigating factor is the plethora of uncouth unkempt destructive and fickle hormones that run rampant and unchecked in rare form, throughout all the winters that reign year(s) in and through all the days of precocious and ironically facetious youth thru the ides of March until age20 comes to pass…..but how much, and towards what end, does the state of the world, internationally and locally weigh in this….if this is a cumbersome and poorly written, it’s bc it’s written in stream of consciousness style. It’s a writing exercise used by writers to hone their […]
Your gentle wrists, your sacred smile. Each longing breath, I take for you.
by Rotted_Flesh
written by Rotted_Flesh
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l6W_0B1nDvw
Lyrics:
In woeful throes of youthful lust,
I held my breath as you held my hand.
Heart to heart, flesh to flesh,
honesty, emotion long repressed.
Confidence and poise that I could never imitate
as you led me down the stairs to where my hopes had lied in wait.
This is how I choose to remember you,
in the light of some hallway I’d never know again.
“Please stay with me.”
And even though our words were wasted, they had never been more true.
Your gentle wrists, your sacred smile. Each longing breath, I take for you.
Hi. This is my first post being on here and I am sort of scared to share my story with everyone. But I will try my best to tell it in the least amount of words possible.
Well, I am 16 and I have bad thoughts almost everyday. I have hated myself for the past few years and I would say it really start when I was turning 13. I started to have feelings for my best friend, who is a girl, and I thought that I was some disgusting freak of nature. My mom was okay with it when I came out to her but […]
I guess I’m just angry about the fact that I feel like no-one cares about me. The people that I feel are my friends make me feel worthless. Even my best friend, who is the nicest person in the world, makes me feel like shit sometimes.
My mum is really strict, so I’m not allowed Facebook, or any kind of social media at all, so I find it hard to keep in contact with my friends. And none of them bother to keep in contact with me.
Before my best friend got Facebook, my other friends would still try and talk to me, to let […]
It feels like nothings really changed. Get hyped over things that peak my interest express nothing towards everything else. It gets easier to talk about my problems or health issues and to have analytical jam sessions with doctors, determining what kind of mental issue ive got. Im so open to the not so pretty and just addressing the existence of things like depression or anger-fueled violence that it deters others from really talking to me….but as the time goes by its bothering me less and less. I care less and less. Its kinda good but at times i worry if that mentality will manifest into […]
I’ve never been to any forums like this, so forgive me if I make a mistake. Here’s the problem. I don’t want to exist anymore. There’s so many things that are wrong in my life. First of all, I hate myself for this, I am bisexual. Now this may seem fine, but in the place I was raised up in. Gays and bisexual people were hated. I haven’t told my family because I’m too scared but a few of my friends know and they took it in really well. I have one really good friend that knows about my problems, he’s been supporting me a […]
My name is Ariel
never really done this, talk about how I feel out in the open with people. I’m 24 been thinking about suicide since I was 16. I haven’t hust thought about it I’ve actually tried a few times. Could never really go thru with it completely. But I’ve tried. The worst part is that I know who I would be hurting, what I would be losing, I see the beauty of life, I see how beautiful the sky is when the sun is slightly shining upon my face, even tho it’s 100 degrees outside. I see the meaning of life In my little […]
I am 20. It’s been 4 years now. Everyday I say to myself “I want to die”. You know the little games we play in our mind. Mine is – saying to myself “I want to die”.
It started off due to academic pressure, then bullies, then other tensions. Eventually I am now a failure everywhere. If we meet someday, you wouldn’t be able to tell that I am suicidal. I wish you could. No way can sense how unhappy I am. I am just another introvert in front of society. Inside I am a tired guy screaming in tears – “I WANT TO DIE”.
I am […]
When they fought, I chose not to fight.
When they cried, I thought there is respite.
Amidst the squibbles and squabbles of life,
My kindly nature kept me rife.
But then came doubt I did my self.
I did my nature, I did my health.
I doubted everything I felt,
And on I went to change my self.
I tried to turn the course of the stream.
Not knowing I was only killing a dream,
Of little joys and a profound realm,
On I went on a broken whelm,
For other dreams were going to be at helm.
I had walked too far still mind […]
I am almost to the point of throwing my sister through a window. As I mentioned in my last post her seizure medicine gives her mood swings. Even worse, she watches children’s shows on Nick Jr. and YouTube all the time. Whenever she watches them on TV, she always has a reason to yell and scream. If a commercial comes on that she doesn’t like, she tells everyone she will not scream. She does it anyway. I’ve always thought my sister is autistic and I don’t know for sure, but my mom keeps denying that. If she is not autistic, then what is she? Seriously, […]
To kill time I binge-watched all 8 seasons of House on netflix. That show basically looks life, death, pain, sickness, grief, mental illness, addiction, lost love, anything else you can think of straight in the face and just puts it out there and really makes you think about how you would deal with that kind of stuff. Wilson was my absolute favorite. His and House’s friendship is the kind that’s excruciatingly hard to find and towards the end of the series House pretty much implied that he is nothing without Wilson. In one of the last episodes he goes on this epic tirade where he […]
Today is my 21st birthday … For some this day is a celebration , a time to enjoy with friends and cherrish it ppl that you consider precious and they consider you in the same magnitude…… But for me this day is one were i reflect on the things i am not doing in my life and i should been doing. I reflect on the causes of my loneliness, the will to go forward that seems to be slipping away and unhappiness/depression that i keep in secret , mostly because i have no one to talk to … I see no […]
The world seems to hate me nowadays. My mom andd dad were divorced when I was five and and then my world turned upside down when my lazy ass stepmom moved in. I had to learn how to take care of myself and my brother with no help, and now I’m 15 and have had to be in the hospital three times already. It’s not like I want to cut, but no matter how hard I try, I alway end up hidden behind long sleeves as bandages on my wrists. I cut myself a few minutes ago, and I’m really thinking about ending it. It all […]
First, who is your daddy and what does he do. Oh sorry, that’s Kindergarten Cop. (I’m silly, I know)
So the other day I was reading through posts here on SP like normal, and I read something someone posted and it really got to me. Because I could relate to her for one, but the way she spoke through her words and what she said just got the best of me. I mean my heart goes out to all of you, but this person really grabbed me. I don’t know how to use this site well. I know how to post, read posts and look at […]
The building is falling part by part, day after day, so the question is:
Jump now or die in the debris?