I’m already invisible
Tag:
invisible
I found my way back to this site, over 3 years since my first and only post. It’s been so long I had forgotten I even made an account. And how disheartening it was to have the realization that in many ways, I am no better now than I was then. The stigma that is still around mental health leads people to believe that these conditions are just something one can “get over”. That surrounding yourself with loved ones, exercising, getting a pet, etc., will “cheer you up”. I stand as one of so very many examples that this is not the case. Though I […]
I don’t know. I have a lot of problems with myself. When it comes to self-esteem I suck. Oh you see a pretty outfit? Oh wait you’re too fat for it. Oh that guy’s cute? Oh, he picked the prettiest girl.
When I was younger I didn’t care what people said about me because I was happy being myself. About a yer ago all that changed. I saw how people dressed and I thought that I should start dressing like that. You know, just to look pretty and fit in. I started changing my style. Getting ‘better clothes’, ‘better shoes’. I wanted to be accepted. Then […]
I’m sick of living in a world where it feels like it doesn’t even matter if i’m here.
No one would miss me, no one would fucking care.
I’m invisible. Why can’t anyone see how sad i am.
Why doesn’t anyone care enough to look past my pitiful smile.
Because no one fucking cares.
I just want to run away to a place where no one knows me. Then i can be alone without feeling that no one loves me.
It’s like i’m living a world where I’ve already been forgotten.
I’m tired of feeling invisible.
I’m tired of feeling like a ghost.
I have been confined to my house for 3 years and confined to bed for long periods of time due to severe, progressive Rheumatoid Arthritis and Anemia. These are my 2 worst health problems out of 30+ diagnosed chronic illnesses.
If you see me on the very rare occasion at a store, you would assume I am heathy. This is why the term “invisible illness” describes many conditions when visible effects of the illness have yet to appear.
My family finally accepted that I need regular rest, i’m crabby, and i am constantly experiencing pain when I was diagnosed with RA. Now they leave me […]
i was playing basketball today and the ball hit my middle finger, and it hurt so bad but that not the thing, the thing is they keep on playing dodging me on the floor NOBODY moved his finger to ask me if i was okay, am i invisible the big question why does everybody do not gives a fuck about me
“The so-called ‘psychotically depressed’ person who tries to kill himself doesn’t do so out of ‘hopelessness’ or any abstract conviction that life’s assets and debits do not square. And surely not because death seems suddenly appealing. The person in whom it’s invisible agony reaches a certain unendurable level will kill himself the same way a trapped person will eventually jump from the window of a burning high-rise. Make no mistake about people who leap from burning windows. Their terror of falling from a great height is still just as great as it would be for you or me standing speculatively at the same window just […]
I used to have faith of some kind (no specific religion; I considered myself to be Agnostic) but after having experienced life and seeing so many horrible things, I no longer believe in a “higher power”. The chaos of life and the fact that there is no control and ultimately no consequences for the vicious acts that humans carry out every day is terrifying. I often find myself cursing at God and then reminding myself that no one can hear me.
With the exception of going to work, I live my life in absolute isolation because I don’t trust anyone (twenty some odd years and I haven’t met one […]
You think it’s just physical
The cookie cutter arms
The chopping board thighs
But there is a battle
A battle beyond the realm of chemistry
Beyond the realm of physical sight
It’s invisible but tangible as you cringe away from the presence
From the presence of this spiritual battlefield under wraps
Felt but not seen
Experienced yet never fully understood
Ever present, ever active
The spiritual warfare waging in our midst
Cookie cutter arms
Chopping board thighs
You keep your distance and avert your eyes
Yet you don’t know why
There is a battle waging
Beyond the corner of your eyes
But there is only reason to […]
I feel so hopeless in life…it always feels like the same thing everyday, I’ve given up all hope, really what is there for me to live for the “friends” who make me feel invisible? The family who could care less about me? Everything that i loved about my life is gone i literally do nothing anymore…How could nobody notice how much i have changed in the past 4 years…depression got the best of me and I honestly don’t know if i will ever be okay again. All I want is to genuinely happy for just one day none of this fake bs anymore…
I’m 46. I’ve lived half of my life already. I’ve been reading through some of the posts, getting an idea of the thoughts – no surprises really. I have been in the place I am now for about 9 months, and off and on over the last 31+ years. That’s a long time to carry burdens.
I do have grown children. Children. The big debate. I did read a post from someone left behind who in an obvious state of anger blamed the departed for leaving them behind selfishly. I have to say there is absolutely no way to assure those that will be left behind […]
I am a 14 year old teenager, depressed and suicidal. I know this may sound stupid but does anyone know any pills that will make me pass out if I overdose? I am not exactly trying to kill myself, just a way of revealing my pain to my parent without having to actually talk to them, but let’s just say I wouldn’t care if I died overdosing.
I know I will receive lots of “don’t do this” “you don’t deserve life” and “you’re worth it” but I don’t believe any of that. I hate my life and myself so much, I don’t think anything or anyone […]
I have been cutting for about three months now. I cut my wrists, legs and stomach. I have been very good at hiding them, at least I thinks so, but now I have a problem. I’m sick therefore not going to school and left alone at home for the day. My mom’s friend is a doctor and my mom asked her to come over and check upon me, find out why I’m sick and how to recover. I’m so scared that the doctor is going to make me undress, because I’ve been to doctors loads of times before I started self harming and many times […]
Here’s what I mean. I just came back from going upto the shops. It took me 2hrs to walk up there & back. I walk in the door, everybody is downstairs & NOBODY notices me. I walk, or rather hobble, right infront of them & no one says anything. Its like I don’t exist until someone wants something from me!
I just want my old life back. Where I was happy, or could pretend easily, would go out every weekend, drink, make friends. Where noone told me I should do this or that, people needed me for help, but they would also help me. Where I […]
I don’t even know where to start, but then again it’s not like anybody will read this right? I’m just that invisible to the world. Invisible to my family, my presence always went by unnoticed. I would say I’m invisible to friends but I don’t have any. They all got relationships and forgot that I existed.
I hate being gay, I wish I wasn’t. I hate being black, I wish I wasn’t. I hate being alive, I wish I wasn’t. Does anybody know exactly how it feels to be an over weight homosexual? Can’t make friends because most are homophobic towards me. Can’t make gay friends […]
I feel like I am always searching for a place to fit in. Just to blend in with all the other people that fit in. But all I manage to do is watch them; Envy them; Pretend that I am like them.
I feels like I am just watching life from behind a glass. I can see what’s going on but I can’t join..I can’t touch them, I am never going to be one of them. There is always Something separating me from them. I don’t exactly know how to describe it. It is invisible and yet when I reach out I can touch it, […]
I’m sick and tired of never being ‘that person’. I’m always the ‘extra’, the girl there, the invisible one, the girl that came with someone, the un-existing. I hate myself for that, but I can’t show me as I am with everybody… I believe I’m too weird. I guess it must be that because everybody says that I’m hard to talk to. That I don’t think like everybody, that I’m weird. An outsider. I want someone to care. I want someone to come over and say hey! let’s talk; instead of: Is she your friend? Can you help me with her? I fucking hate my […]
im really fucked up in the head & i just want to die so i can be at peace but im too afraid to kill myself im extremly miserable that im still here … why dont i have the balls to end it ? death is all i think about i even wish i get sick with cancer or something so i can die cause im too scared to do it myself …. i want to go im tired of being/felling sad,miserable,worthless,unloved,invisible,ugly,unhappy etc IM JUST TIRED & READY TO GO
It’s too hard to watch everyone but me get married, travel, do great things. I’m just sitting here, wasting away, working on a business that’s failing hard in it’s first week, and I have no money. Yes, I’ve applied to actual jobs and have been in the long process of a government position. Nothing’s really happening for me. It’s far too depressing. I’ve tried very hard for things to happen. Honestly, I’ve held a few campaigns from DoSomething.org, I’ve started my new business a week ago, hired so many new sales consultants to generate business (so far, nothing despite their 10+ years sales experience), and I […]
Almost a year ago I tried to kill myself after my husband of 23 years dumped me. I had alcohol and Xanax and felt that was a way to tell him f*ck you. I ended up in ICU for a day then the nuthouse for two more. After I got out he left me alone by myself for a day and half until my sister got here. I could barely walk but he didn’t care. Since then I have been trying to cope with the whole situation but its hard after finding out he was engaged to another woman before we were even divorced. My […]