What’s the point in living if you can’t enjoy it?
i dont have much time left. so i think im going to try and enjoy the time i have left, try and drown out all the bad stuff, talk to my friends, whatever. ill still keep trying to look for a job, but i doubt ill get one at this point. its almost over just 2 more weeks. i hope something good will happen, but i know it wont. thats ok ill be ok ijust have to pretend like its not happening for a while and then it will be over.
I may have finally figured everything out. Im at a point where i cant get better. I just need to stay where I am in this state in which I need to be alone and rot. My Parents sometimes care and throw me away especially my father. But, They care more about my drug addict brother. They treat him more better than me. He curses them out and threatens them yet they keep letting him in the house. He is fucking 21 for christs sake! Im leaving to the Marine Corps. on janurary 11 and Im ready for the day to come. Im Obviously too […]
PAINNNNNNNNN! WITHOUT LOVEEEEEEEE! LIKE IT ROUGH! FUCK THIS SHIT ! FUCK EVERYTHING! FUCK EXISTENCE! WHERE ARE YOU GOD? WHY DO I FEEL SO FUCKING GUILTY FOR MY PARENTS MISTAKES AND ABOUT OTHERS? WHY DO I THINK MORE ABOUT THE OTHERS AND THEN ABOUT ME? FUCK THIS SHIT! PAINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN! NONE CARES ABOUT YOU! .. WHAT’S THE POINT? what’s the point…
World is crazy
Not always bothered about us
Humans animals
Today is a lonely day for me
Sitting in the gallows of shadow
This is the type of day I call for knife
My friend
Listening to sad song
That express my sorrow and loneliness
I make one cut second and than third
And i sit bleeding
Reflecting on my life
Trying to figure out the meaning
Life
Death
What’s the point of it
As the day ends
I give my life another chance
I am so confused. Why do i constantly think things will get better. I swear i will never think like that again. What’s the point??? I hate me…so i know you hate me. No surprise. Fuck this shit. Fuck trying.
Two years, a recent attempt. A short trip. I get released just as easily. A mistake in calling, not knowing the trip would happen, or that it would be mandatory. They make me feel like shit, but at this point much anyone and anything does that. A rock could do that. Im too sensitive and not in a good way, I remain bitter. I try to operate from a place of rightous anger. At this moment, I’m surrounded by people I am aware do not like me. I was supposed to accept it, but when you feel… like that sort of weird, unapprochable person for […]
i cant sleep. The anxiety and fear of going to school the next day to get bullied keeps me awake. When i do sleep its filled with nightmares of past experiences. and the voices. they’re always there i need help but doctors dont know what to do with me. At this point i feel like giving up.
I got arthritis at 20. Now I’m soon 28 and I recently had to quit my job because of my disease.
I’m an introvert and also suffer from social anxiety. I have been depressed for as long as I can remember.
Now I’m in danger of losing my apartment because no one wants me for work. I never speak to people, so I have no friends, just some acquaintances.
I used to have at least a spiritual point of view at the shit in my life. I’ve experienced some trancendental stuff, but now I don’t see any point whatsoever.
I just want to die. Society is made for extroverted, […]
If we could love ourselves, we would not need others to love us. Then it becomes irrelevant whether others love us or not. Fine if they love us. Fine if they don’t love us. But how do we get there? How do you and I get there? What is it that others see in themselves, in the world, that we can’t? At what angles do we need to tilt our heads? What does it mean to love ourselves? How does it feel to love ourselves? If taking care of ourselves is not love, then what is? At what point in the road does care turn […]
Lately things haven’t been looking up to me. It’s been brining me down to my lowest point, to the point were I don’t feel like my family or friends care about me anymore and I want to die. Everyone always compares me to someone I’m not and that makes me wish I was someone else. I wrote my suicide note out to my closest friends incase I make the drastic decision. I know who to send the message to and hopefully they will allow me to go in peace. I’m not taking my life anytime soon (I don’t think) but if things don’t look up […]
I find it extremely difficult to actually make decent real life friends.
I’m 15 years old and all the “Real life friends” ive had up until this point have either used me or don’t care about me and make fun of me.
I made another post about most of my life and in that post I explained how I had cancer from when I was 9 up until I was 14. most of the people I know call me cancer boy and some people act so scared of me because they might catch my disease even though it is not contagious (obviously) and I do not have […]
to say too much?
If this is the only life that we are going to live through, and our only chance at happiness, isn’t it a bit worth sharing emotions and passions to the point that it becomes awkward? Isn’t that what being a human is all about?
My trouble with relationships is the mundane. Fuck the weather. Fuck sports. Fuck fashion. Fuck Hollywood. I’d rather talk about us and the silly memories that we’ve been through, and, of course, the bad ones too. Others in my life, however, do they desire these relationships like I do?
I yearn for passionate relationships but get stuck when someone tells […]
Ive gotten to the point where i dont really feel bad for a number of things. I still feel in the ‘wrong’ on a social stance because i feel that i might be lacking empathy and well thats my own self analysis. Im entitle to it right? I do feel at times im horrible, a monster it would be better to burn my bridges than to subject those who still care to my ups and downs. But then they’re also choosing to stick around when they know how bad things can get with me.
Things have never felt or seemed so clear before. A lot […]
I feel so sad today. And nobody notices, nobody wants to talk to me, nobody cares. It might aswell be invisible.
Im sad to the point i can’t even cry anymore.
I just have this cold blank look in my eyes. I really dont know what to do anymore, nobody understands me, i dont understand me.. I feel so lonley. So sad.
I dont want to hope anymore, i just want to die. I dont want false hope anymore.. I just want to sleep and never wake up. If only it were that easy.
I don’t think people understand the true meaning of depression, or what it really is. When you are depressed you see your life as something meaningless, hopeless, worthless, loneliness, and the list just keeps going on and on as it continues. I attend a high school and people notice that I’m always somewhat depressed or feeling down but yet people never approach me and end up ignoring me and don’t really seem to care about me or what I have to say. When people do end up approaching […]
I question myself everyday and wonder why I’m still here. I struggle with depression. Went from a really bad relationship to an even worst one. I feel lonely in this world and I can’t seem to find myself. At times I feel like I’m completely alone in this world. I feel betrayed by the ones I love the most. I question why is it that those people hurt us the most and don’t seem to care. I think I’m just going insane to the point were I want to commit suicide.
Lately I’ve been asking myself one question. What’s the point of everything I’m doing?
Why am I trying?
Who really even care’s what happens to me?
See I’m a single mom of two. I have a two year old and a four year old. An ex who doesn’t give two flying chicken nuggets about them and a family that more or less feels like they despise me lately. I can’t get over no matter how hard I try people still seem to hate me for some reason. I screwed up and called a close friend a friend today and he got upset because he was hoping for the […]
So the other day I was in a kik chat with 35 people who have use or still use SP as a place to vent. A few people recently joined the chat after being away from sp and chat fot at least a year, and they had seemingly moved on with their life. So they were discussing their time they spent here in this community, and I began reading.
The conversation went something like this,
Person 1 – “I’m so glad that time of my life is over…”
Person 2 – “Yeah, we poured so much of ourselves and emotions into SP, it was really hard
There was more […]