Have you ever asked yourself, “when would suicide be the right thing to do?” What line needs to be crossed before killing oneself is justified? And once one finds justification for killing oneself, what possible future is there for them if they can’t? This is where I am. Struggling in vain to find a way to end it. Too cowardly to do anything painful, too selfish to give up wanting. I don’t want to die, I just deserve to. I’m not finding a way to cope. The world would be a better place without me. Everyone with whom I come into contact ultimately ends up […]
Hello to whoever is reading this,
Two years ago I posted a suicide note on this website with the sincere belief that I would be dead within a week of posting it. But, I guess things don’t always go as planned. The day I planned on doing it, I realized that I couldn’t do it. Whether it was me being too weak, too scared or just too depressed to even follow through with my last plan, I just didn’t end up dead.
I don’t know what stopped me, but I am thankful for it. 2 years later, my life has turned around.
Now don’t get me wrong, I […]
Hello whoever is reading this.
I hope your life, day, week, hasnt been shitty like some people on here. I know i shouldnt sound so selfish but god i cant take any of this anymore. Does anyone understand how hard it is looking in the mirror HATING what you see? because trust me i know the feeling. You look in the mirror and all your fears just get bottled up and thrown at you, right? I dont know if its just me, or society creating this image in my head of how i should look. I am 5’7 and weigh 128.2 pounds. i use to weigh […]
Hello, people reading this i have a huge problem and i need your advice. I am 17 years old and i have tried to commit suicide more then 5 times. Everytime something in my life goes wrong aall i think about is how to kill myself , but this time i might really do it. So i will be entering the 12th grade this year and there is a HUMONGOUS amount of pressure on me to go study abroud and get into a Great University, but the thing is i TOTALLY FAILED my international AS level examinations and those grades are really important to get […]
i was reading today where Belgium gave the euthanasia green light to a healthy 24 year old woman who has been wanting to die since she was a kid. She claimed that life was just not for her. I can relate to that in so many ways. Euthanasia for the mentally ill is gaining ground in that great nation, I just wish it would gain the same kind of ground in the ole US of A.
I remember when Brittney Maynard was giving interviews about her right to die due to her terminal brain tumor. I was hoping that her message would spread to the nifty […]
I haven’t really gotten a chance to vent to others. Most of the time I’m too afraid to actually spill what’s on my mind to those closest to me, or my thoughts are too jumbled that I can’t really describe what I’m feeling very well so I have to brush it off and say ‘oh it’s nothing, don’t worry about it’ or ‘it’s a long story’. So when I saw this site I was pretty happy because not only can I actually say what I’m actually thinking without the fear of being stigmatized, but I can actually help myself cope by sharing everything that’s been […]
I wish the world was like in my imagination. I’m on my computer all day and I like looking up random images, like this one:
and putting a positive spin on it. Pictured are guards from concentration camps (in case you can’t see the photo or don’t know their history, they are very mean people). But it’s nice to imagine that in reality they aren’t that bad. They are a group of friends hanging out, having guiltless fun, not torturing people or having bad thoughts […]
Hello, I am thirteen and I believe my life sucks. Ya my life sucks. I have multiple problems in my life but I won’t share them all. I…You know fuck it. I might just kill myself tomorrow for all that matters. No one cares about me, I wake up every morning thinking “Is it finally time” as you can right now that I’m obviously not dead. I used to make fun for thinking this. Now, I realize that life isn’t fair. Nothing is fair. I’m just saying that nothing will ever fucking matter for me anymore. Thank you for reading through this. š
-Time
I guess I’ll write something, just to get it out. Suicide. I’m not sure I really desire suicide, I’m kind of just like this one person’s story I just read. Floating in between the lines of life and death. Not really wanting to die, but just wanting to disappear and have everyone forget about me. I’m kind of confused about myself.
Let’s see… about me. Their hasn’t really been any major incident in my life. I guess I was bullied by this one kid when I was young, but I’m kind of over it – just when I hear his name or see him I […]
I normally rummage through this page reading people’s stories. The stories on this site have had a subtle effect on rendering my depressive states managable. I come here when I am about to flip the switch. And when I do, I feel like I’ve found peace with myself. Ughh sometimes I feel like a masochist. Living vicariously through people’s pain. I’m sorry but that’s what keeps me dangling on a soon-to-rapture string fastened to a shitty purposeless existence.
My heart goes out to an SP member named tphg. I come from a Third world country in Afrika that you’d be hard-pressed to locate on the world […]
How the hell can I do this for another 30-40 years? Working job after job to support this joyless life. Once I outlive my usefulness at this office I’m at now, I’ll have to start the process all over again of finding full-time work. And then again once that job ends. And again and again and again until I drop dead. I’d rather drop dead now and save myself the trouble of spending all the good hours of the day pushing papers and moving boxes and photocopying and etc.
Been reading up on jumping and it’s becoming more appealing everyday. From what I’m reading, sounds like […]
I use to be haunted by my dreams and thoughts. Now I embrace them and love them because I always die in them and they always offer peace. That’s all I want. Peace. I’m not scared of death, I’m scared of what comes after death. I’m starting to just deal with whatever happens afterwards cause I’m done with this life. I think I’m finally getting the courage to hang myself. I’m trying to learn how to tie a noose. The thing is, I don’t care about me. I care about random strangers that are on this website that feel like me. There’s a whole website […]
I am not doing so well, my mother is dying and I am havingĀ a hard time dealing with it. She has been my life for a very long time and I made sure she was fine each and every day.Ā She is 78 and now has heart problems and pneumonia which are making it hard for her to fight off the infection.Ā I have been depressed for some timeĀ now and have been weighing ways to kill myself. I had finally decided on sleeping pills but after reading so many horror stories about people who take 30 or so pills and they don’t die- would […]
Hi everyone, it’s been a while now since I’ve been checking this site and it’s my first post.
Im a 37 yrs old man from Lebanon (Middle East) and have been suicidal for about three months now. I’ve never opened up to anyone about this. I’m facing collosal monsters (dept, family and work problems)… recently realized that I’m clinically depressed (wasn’t diagnosed though) and that I pushed away every single human being in my life.
I’m sinking into this downward spiral no matter how hard I try to escape it. Really fucking tired of this shit called life and I don’t know if I have the balls […]
Day Three of this forum. I have got some anti-depressants also typically prescribed for people with PTSD. I think that pretty much sums up what I have. Extreme anxiety, constantly stuck in ‘Fear’ mode – fight or flight.
I’ve fought the system for a long time, I’ve been anti-medication but I am honestly grateful now hopefully for a bit of relief. I know the meds come with potential side-effects and I am already experiencing some nausea but hoping that in the long run the good outweighs the bad.
I am also going to have some counselling sessions set up for me. So let’s watch this space. For […]
ok, so normally, i’m a pretty happy person, but lately, i’ve been thinking of things. like, cutting myself, or killing myself, and this has never happened before. also, i’ve been having these panic attacks, and just being really sensitive and emotional. i think it might be this fanfiction i have been reading, because it has selfharm and other really triggering things in it. i dont even know what to do anymore.
This is the last place that I’m willing to share my thoughts. I’m tired of trying to help people understand how I feel about life; it’s a waste of a breath. As a self-professed nihilist, one of the big rules that I live by is that “it doesn’t matter what other people know”. Trying to convince anyone of anything is a waste of breath. Just leave them all to their own meaningless thoughts and I’ll stick to mine.
But here, I’m as close to being around comrades as I’ll ever be. Even though I feel half dead from a viral infection in my chest, that
I feel I can’t take this anymore. I failed exams, relationship, health, social life and bla bla bla. I feel miserable. I don’t know what to do with my life. I’m hopeless,pointless. š These days I’m at my lowest point. Helpless. Maybe suicide is the only answer. Thanks for reading.
and it’s so painful to see you in such despair.
That this must be our cross to bear, what brings us together as perfect strangers. The black dog on our shoulder. Wish it could be anything else for all of us.
I spent all night last night reading through posts and comments. When I came in I was crying for myself, hoping not to feel the end of my rope once more. I went to bed crying for others, hoping they can somehow find their way back up their rope, and if not, that they can find in death the peace they so crave and deserve. I […]
I’ve read a lot of posts on here and it seems we all feel similarly which hurts. I feel for all of you. Its like were all stuck in a dark room with our depression and we can’t see anyway out but if we turn the lights on were not alone, we’re all here with the same issue, suicide. I can’t seem to get passed it and today was one of those days where I feel even more convinced that I should killl myself. I’ve changed from the person I was before but it doesn’t matter, I now know no matter how much good I […]