So, my problem may seem stupid to everyone, but its something that has been bothering me for a long time. My best friend… I guess former best friend and I have always fought since about a year after I met him (which was 4 years ago). We had a ton in common back then, and have changed since then and are pretty different now. However, we have always remained great friends minus the fighting all the time. Which, I may say, a lot of the fighting has been my fault as much as his. But, a few weeks ago, it got really bad. He started […]
Tag:
Sad
Chapter Two of my story, which began with, “On Wednesday Night, I broke.”
On Friday, December 2, I attempted suicide. I hung myself by my neck with a cable TV coax strung through a metal shelf. I failed, because I was startled by an unexpected sensation of falling. I told my wife, and she called my mother, and the two of them put me on a sort of informal “suicide watch”. This is what happened after that.
On Sunday, my mother came over and spent most of the day with me. She’s a former cop and detective sergeant in the […]
i need to keep busy because every time I’m not I’m more sad and i only think of how I’m gonna be alone forever…
kayso… I’ve told you guys about my break up… it was on january 2nd and ever since that night i cry myself to sleep every night…
theres two other guys….they both like me.. but also live far away… and i know i like them… but it hurts to admit it becuz i feel so guilty… i miss my boyfriend so much…. and they other two guys are trying to cheer me up and make me happy…. and it works… but as soon […]
im scared. and i dont know what to do anymore. i feel like im falling deeper into depression, and i cant take it. i cried like 10 times in the past few days. everything is so stressing to me. and i feel like things  are affecting me more. like im more sensitive for some reason. ive never been this sensitive. so its weird to me, and i dont know how to deal with stuff. i just want to be dead. i actually havent cut for months now. last time i cut it was all down my left arm. from elbow to wrist all covered. but […]
I am just depressed extremely depressed severely depressed…….. and unloved. I hate myself, I really really really want to die. But most of all I want something to love and to be loved……
Humans, humanity, and this (earthly) world/life is not/never a perfect place..
sometimes it even can be ‘blamed’ because of our human’s hard-wired Nature. ie: the way we’re ‘created’.
A famous atheist literature Christopher Hitchens who just passed away ironically few days before Christmas, he said this: “Evolution has meant that our prefrontal lobes are too small, our adrenal glands are too big, and our reproductive organs apparently designed by committee; a recipe which, alone or in combination, is very certain to lead to some unhappiness and disorder.”
think about that, really…and this is even still just ONE factor (ie: I’m still not talking about other ‘imperfections’ nature […]
Forgive yourself & other humans,..because this *earthly* life is not perfect…and we’re all only humans…we made mistakes.
and besides, we all live only ONCE in this earthly life, so that’s why many people made mistakes in their life, because you can’t simply turn back time and repeat life..
So forgive yourself (& others), free yourself from all the restricting guilts,
keep learning,
and keep doing the Best & worthwhile while you’re still given a chance to exist and alive here in this physical world…
Last night i attempted to kill my self  again. I’ve been so sad lately and im lonely and want to die. so i took a bunch of one of my meds then a handful of this a handful of that . after telling my brother and mom i threw up and now i just feel tired. Something hit me last night , i don’t want to die like this. I don’t want to die  because im afraid of why may come my way.  When i die i want to be happy , don’t let depression get the best of you.
After all the fighting the judge believed the lie’s  my ex’s mother put  before him .He didn’t even request proof. Before I’ll sign my my rights over I’ll be dead. I will not have my only surviving child from my first marriage think I don’t want him. I’ve received threats , calls e-mail letters under the door since 2006. ‘If I try for one I’ll lose all three.” If I don’t walk away anything could happen to one of the kids. Accidents happen all the time.” And I can’t even prove it was them either of them, ex husband or ex mother-in-law. They have money and I don’t.  I have […]
I don’t even know what to do. I know he loves me, deep down. When he’s drunk he tells me that he loves me and that he’d take a bullet for me. But thats the only time he does. When he’s drunk. He used to tell me all the time, we’ve been together for 9 months and I love him so much. I have caught him out sending dirty messages to other girls before and he’s always said sorry to me. But the other week I saw a message to a girl he met in a club telling her she was really pretty and he […]
Some of you can probably relate.
I’m a friendless, lazy dumbass. Who was suicidal….
I’m not a lazy person by nature, nor am I really dumb, but that’s how school makes me feel like, what with all these low grades, and the constant reminder to do better and the uneeded pressure from parents and teachers. I just don’t give a shit about some of the classes at school, like math and history and chemistry, they are sooo boring, and I just dont bother with it–atleast I try not to, but It’s hard to not be bothered by all the work schools pile on us, which are mostly useless, boring information that […]
ok so this is not bout a guy, but i kinda has to do with one… so this boy and i are best friends. and we both like each other. and he always finds away to rip my heart out. and this wouldnt hurt so bad if we were so close. both are parents are mean to us, they never treat us good. we both have friends. but they are all pretty much assholes. and everyone thinks im asain when im not. i dont no how i was born with it. i kinda look like my dad, and gmom. but whatevr tht some of […]
Im 13, i live in britian in a country called scotland. A few years ago everything was amazing, i had my family and my friends i loved live. In 2007 is where everything started to get worse, one of my grandfathers passed away and three months later my other grandfather took a sudden heart attack and died. Then i started losing constantrition at school, i couldnt think, i didnt want to have friends. A few boys bullied me, id get called lots of names, when i started high school, everything was okay, i was poplaur, everyone seemed to really like me it was good i […]
The burden of days
buy another simply to struggle through
weary hand wants to fold, weary back can not hold
wonders the point when there’s nothing new
Contempt for the ways
digging deeper & knowing it’s wrong
much too far from goal, farther still from the soul
is the horizon to come or already gone
The lament of the loss
thought the walls would deflect the hurt
but it all feels like hell in our out of the shell
even the rose ends up rot in the dirt
Resent for the mirror
failed until nothing else can be known
those aspiring demands turned to ash in my hands
“The planet is fine. The people are fucked.†– George Carlin
Hail George.
he’s right.
fucking humans who like to over-complicate everything with all their ‘systems’ and rules and BS.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QW4x4gswm-o
“Tsubasa wo Kudasai” (Please Give Me Wings)
Lyrics translation:
“If I could have my wish come true right now
I’d want to have wings
Please place wings on this back
like a bird
I want to spread my wings
and fly in these heavens
To the free sky with no sadness
I want to flutter my wings and fly
Even now, I don’t need money nor fame,
what I want are wings!
The things I dreamt as a child,
I still dream about them today!
I wan’t to spread my wings
and fly into this wide sky!
I want to flap my wings and fly to this
free sky filled […]
Reason for my downfall is simple: this real world is too damn boring, I can’t stand it anymore
by niki
written by niki
Perhaps to the contrary of what many of you would think here,
I am actually live from a quite healthy & “normal” situation/environment, eg:
– I am born from a quite loving, and healthy family. My childhood was a quite happy ones, with lots of traveling here & there.
– I am from a quite middle-to-upper class family, which can be said, I’m pretty much okay/well-off, albeit not super/very-rich.
– I even went to all those what “normal” society would call “great routes” in life like: great education & school overseas (in U.S, “The Land of the Dream” for immigrant people like me, which is […]
I love philosophy but questioning the things that we base our lives on scares me whilst exciting me. I don’t know what to do anymore. I have no friends to hang out with, outside of school. I lost the few I had. I spend my days on the computer looking for things to put my mind to. I eagerly search for films and music that somehow relates to my endless negative feelings in order to find some connection with another person, even though I have never met them and they are oblivious of my existence. I saw my psychologist for the first time a week […]
Life sucks. Why do bad things always happen to good people? I am a good person. I have ALWAYS had it hard. My mom was a psycho who abused me and the courts did nothing until I was 15 and by then what was the point? I had my first daughter when I was 17 and got married early and had a family by the time I was old enough to drive. I’ve always struggled but managed to somehow scrape by.
Things have always been rough but I’ve hung in there and just clung on to some kind of hope. I’ve busted my butt and been […]