so me and boyfriend slept all summer together. and we were soo close. then we go to school and all this shit happens. we start falling apart, and at first we work it out. but it just keeps getting worse and worse. and he starts cheating on me cause i wouldnt makeout with him on commond. and if i didnt kiss him he would get super mad and call me bad names. it was riping me apart. and this boy now will not talk to me. and im noticing i dont want to eat cause i miss him to much :/ i just wish i […]
Tag:
Sadness
Im tired of this it hurts to much i cnt stop crying all i do is cry and it feels like icnt breathe like im slowly drowning. Icut myself to calm dwn but it dsnt last long idk wat else to try and wat makes things worse is all my so called friends hav basically abandoned me ihave no one ican talk to im all alone and it hurts to think i always will be. its gotten to the point were ive cryed so much ive made myself sick. Ive thought about ending it once and for all but iwant ther to be no chance […]
I just want to die can someone please tell me how to… I don’t know how I’m going to wake up tomorrow and face the thousands of people at my university in my current state of deep sadness. I have no future and no reason to live how do I end it once and for all. I know this is an answer everyone on here is searching but what reasonable painless ways are their.
Please respond quickly I have no hope left at all.
i am a 40yr old woman and i have had P.T.S.D for 5yrs.4yrs ago i jumped off a cliff to kill myself but landed on a ledge 100 foot down and survived.ever since then i have regretted not dying that night.i have been in and out of psychiatric hospital and have a whole load of mental health professionals,housing support,alcohol support and work support and of course friends and family supporting me on a daily basis yet i still cant manage to feel any better.i gave up drinking 162 days ago and i assumed i would feel better but i dont.i am on the brink of […]
Okay so everyone always wants to know what my problem is, why I feel this way or why I seem totally unable to make things better. But for fucks sake they don’t know me, or my history, so they’re in no position to judge! The fact is if they did, they’d probably understand why I want to die as badly as I do. And trust me it’s such a long, sordid and sad story that half the time I wouldn’t even know where to start or how to explain. Sometimes I look at the way my life has turned out and it makes me fume with […]
I don’t really believe my story is one of suicide. It’s more a story of depression, if it’s even that. I don’t really know what I feel most of the time, and I tend to revert to sadness. Often I find myself pondering reasons I have to be sad.
I have never been beaten by my parents, never been horribly embarrased by my peers, I have friends who I hang out with consistently, I have a good job, I am a smart young man, I have tutors in life, I have good health. So really there is no reason to be sad, right?
If that is true […]
It will never be ok…
I have spent the entire day in a fight. A fight with myself, with my boyfriend, with my life. I don’t want to do this anymore. I am so filled with anger and hate that I can’t stand to be around myself. This has been going on for a long time. I am a college graduate and looking at med school, but right now I don’t feel like I am good enough to even get in. I am taking science prereq’s and I just got a C on my last A & P exam. I feel so stupid. It doesn’t help that I have an […]
Things, for lack of a better word, have not been well. A year ago, I met the woman of my dream, an angel, true beauty. We were married and the wine began to flow. I’d find myself needing to leave bars, having put down more whisky and xanax than any normal man should. One night, while in a drunken rage, I did the unspeakable, a slapped that beautiful woman. The look of sadness and pain in her eyes is still etched in my brain. I was arrested and sentences to some alcohol classes. The drinking worsened to the point that we started staying apart several […]
No one is going to read this. I don’t know why I came back here to this website. I figured I never would after I found it the first time, but here I go again… This is exactly like when I found out I was pregnant, to a T; I was going to end my life, but then, an opportunity presented itself. I saw what might be a reason to live. Judging by before, assuming that the past paints a pretty good portrait of the future, I’ll be worse off than before. If I had gone through with everything before, I wouldn’t be hurting this way […]
I canceled my next appointment with my shrink. I feel as if I’ve given up on myself already. I started cutting again and it feels amazing to wake up from such blankness. That apathy, mind over matter. However, the tolerance is already building; fast this time. I’m already running the cuts under hot water for the extra wake up sensation.
What is it about our society that makes us fear and hate death so much? We are brainwashed, conditioned to value life and disapprove of death.
Maybe it’s because we are born selfish and our actions are primarily done in self interest. For example, let’s say I […]
It’s been 6 years of an undiagnosed, untreated progressive depression.
The Stages:
Stage one just started with deep thinking. What we all go through, what is life worth? who loves me? what would the world be like if i’m dead, etc.
Stage two became mind over matter. This is the point beyond sadness. Cutting never hurt, it was just a way to wake up into reality again, to start feeling again, even it was just sadness.
Stage three was my addiction. I became addicted to cutting as it would relieve me of the emptiness. Cutting eventually stopped working (it works like pain killers, my body developed a tolerance), […]
It all started a year and a half ago when I came home from school to find out that my mother had died from an drug overdose earlier that morning. Being a daughter of an former alcoholic father and drug addict mother, I’ve had some hard times. From neglect to some form of abuse. From moving into a new house every couple of months with other family to watching my mother slowly die on the bathroom floor from an overdose – again. I’ve been through many things that some people would never experience. Or so I’ve been told. That was probably the worst day of […]
I’m 23, gay male and miserable a good deal of the time. I feel like I have no right to be so unhappy when I have so much going for me, but rather than feel guilty, I feel like, it’s not fare. Why would someone, God, Fate, Karma, whatever, give me so much to enjoy and so little capacity to enjoy it. I walked home alone tonight from a big drag show where everyone was having a good time. On the way out the door, I cheerily said goodbye to five friends, two of my therapists and the boy I’m in love with, who only […]
I am 30 now. I was thinking a lot about suicide since I was a teenager, but i never tried it, all I did was cutting myself.
I always thought this sadness and lonelyness inside me would go away, but it just didn’t.
When i was 21 i was in therapy for a while and I stopped cutting myself after that, moved abroad and started school. But the sadness always stayed with me.
I graduated from school, I am an artist and in school i was really good, but now it’s of course very difficult. That’s probably how it is for everybody, but i don’t have the strength […]
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