I need stitches to mend my heart. I had to break up with my older bf bc my other made me. Ever since that and the death of my aunt and uncle I really wish to go and curl up into a ball with a knife and slice and slice until I bleed out.
Tag:
Stitches
Sliced my thigh open, needless to say it (death) didn’t happen. It (the experience of slicing myself open) was fun, loved itt! A wonderful rush, some drugs, some stitches and I’ve been healed (praise the lord!). Didn’t hit anything important I suppose but it’s whatever. I’m thankful for the experience. I’ve grown from it. Wheee I’m done.
Ya’ll are some beautiful souls.
Didn’t even get to meet god.
Or Satan.
Hospital bills are a rip off.
So how goes the day. I have recently been on holidays (May 28th to June something) and within the first two weeks of being back I was in the hospital twice. Once I admitted myself. Only stayed there for 71 hours and like 50 minutes(few minutes before my 72 hour hold was finished, and btw I went in voluntarily and they still put me on a form), the second time was a suicide attempt. I stuck my wrist into SUICIDAL EXPLICIT CONTENT. That time though I went in voluntarily and they didnt put me on a form. Odd indeed. Anyways only stayed there for about […]
I have officially decided to make sure I kill myself this time. I don’t know exactly when, but it’s going to be soon. Â The only time I’ve tried it was around 6 months ago. I took a pack of razors to the alternative school I was attending at the time, went to the bathroom, and started cutting my arms. I only managed to get through the first layer of skin at first. I knew this wouldn’t be enough to bleed out so I took the razor and started slicing into one of the long wounds I had already made and I hear a knock at […]
I wish I would have found a site like this 6 years ago.  My life once so full of promise, senior in high school, on the dean’s list with a life of grander ahead.  Started down a bad path.  I think I’ve always been bipolar.  The highs are never better, and the lows can’t get any lower.  Started experimenting with drugs.  Found my drug of choice in pain meds.  I was good at hiding the pain on the inside with a happy face on the outside as long as I was numb enough to not care any longer.  The addiction got worse. Drinking and driving after […]
Emotions swirling
Happiness, anger, sadness
Which do i feel?
I feel fake
Unloved, unwanted
I am weak
Just a side character
I seek to be noticed
and held
But no one can see me
Amd i transparent? Invisible?
Doesn`t anybody care?
I cry silent tears
and everything i say falls on deaf ears
I am a souless doll
I have no free will
A doll`s emotions are painted on
Artificial
No one knows what the doll wanted
For the doll doesn`t speak for itself
I have to be a Fake person
to be seen
I have to be perfect
not me
I have to live up to
Expectations
not my limits
Everyday my will and emotions leak
From a cut in my being
A cut so deep that not even stitches
Could keep infection out
I […]
Hi, my name is Tatyana, people call me tatty. As I was growing up everything seemed normal, mom always thought I had ADHD and everyone else said I was normal. But I wasn’t. My mom met the man ad her dreams, so she thought. He was nice, to her. Me.. Well he’d beat the hell out of me. He’s make me bleed, he smashed me so hard he got my blood on the wall and on my bed, I was only 5 years old. I’ve been in 8 foster homes. They were all horrible. Tryed killing myself when I was 7 I over dosed on […]
I was just thinking. Why do people guilt trip over cutting themselves?
Who the fuck cares what other people think? (Well, maybe that’s more of my perspective.) It’s non-lethal, it hurts less than getting a tattoo, you just don’t get a pretty picture at the end. I mean, for pain itself, there would be constructive and productive things to do like yoga, or running till your legs give out, that hurt a lot more than some scrapes. The intensity of pain you feel from pushing your bodily limits are usually a lot worse than the actual act of cutting. If you consistently need stitches and […]
Omfg i screwed… Stupid me just made a promise i know i wont b able to keep… I promise my friend whom i call my sister Ember that i wouldn’t cut till my birthday not even on my birthday and i mean its not that far but to me it feels like a eternity my bday is on the 16th this month.. And every year since i was 6 years old i would cut my hip (where the bone is) and i would cut deep enough i would almost need stitches but not deep enough that it would leave a scar.. But i would dip […]
This is the question:
I wonder where it will end should it be in the neighborhood park or a diff city and state?This is my story:
I have tried to OD on drugs at 15 years old I’m 47 now. The drugs was not enough to kill me plus they pumped my stomach. The state of GA took me away from the ones who would beat me and stomp me. I was in hospital for 3-4 days then I was put in a crazy house and stayed there for 6 long months. When I did get out I was placed in a home that the state […]
I don’t really know why I’m here. Just to vent I guess.. Well I’m 17. I’ve been depressed for god knows how long. I don’t really get along that great with my dad or mom. They both abuse me. I cut myself sometimes. I recently had to get stitches cause I went to far with the cutting. My boyfriend of 4 months was really the only reason I wanted to be alive, and didn’t kill myself. But tonight I received a text from his sister.. it said “Hey my brother is talking to other girls and my brother says that he loves them to you […]
Hi there, i don’t want to go into a lot of detail so i will try keep it short. I have suffered from severe depression for 10 years. It started with a breakdown caused by a split with my boyfriend and i swallowed a bottle of paracetomol. I freaked out and called for help. After that i overdosed again and slit my wrists twice and needed stitches. I was hospitalised on and off for a few years and was mis diagnosed with bipolar type 2 disorder. I’ve seen a number of psychiatrists over the years and have been on every single medication you can imagine […]
I got told by many doctors and psychiatrists that I had depression around two/three years ago. Since then they have told me that “it will get better” or “you can be cured”. Lately, I haven’t noticed anything getting better at all. Actually, I’ve been feeling a lot worse than usual. A few weeks ago I had an appointment to see if I needed medication, they told me once again that “it will get better”. So, no medication. I’m not angry that I didn’t get it, I’m just sick of hearing the same thing over and over again.
My sister also has depression. But, unlike me, she […]
I have been cutting myself all day and I really can’t stop I have tried but I have already cut myself 187 times today and will probably do it again. I have tried distracting myself. Or using a rubber band or ice cube but nothing is working. The some of the cuts are quite deep and some are just enough to bleed I don’t want to go to the hospital but I really can’t stop and some are bad enough to need stitches. I don’t want to tell my family but they do know that I cut. And I am running out of room for […]
i was fed up the other day of fighting just to survive everyday, you see, i’ve been living on the streets for a couple of months and life if just getting worse and worse by the day… i dont have any money for food or drink as the goverment have fucked my benfit claim up so i have had to beg everyday, mostly unsuccesfully, for food and/or drink.. i have lost everything in life and was at the point of giving up… i gathered a few sharp objects (broken cup, glass, needle and empty can) and started hacking at my arm, making a ‘T-shaped’ gash which […]
I wrote a post sometime last week. I am not sure of the date as it was mostly a blur.  The time came again. Last Tuesday at 5pm after countless minutes/hours/days/weeks etc etc of wondering if suicide was what I want, I tried to commit suicide for the third time. I popped a hell of a lot of panadol, drank some vodka and cut my wrist (again). This time I was going to be successful, I was bleeding everywhere (I had hit a vein) and I was slowly passing out. It was getting harder and harder to keep my eyes open. Then much to my disgust my mother […]