My name is Elizabeth. I am 14 years old, and I’ve wished for death for a couple of years, and I’m certain it is the only thing I’ll be able to succeed in this life; I’ve tried not to think about it, but it always comes back. In moments when I’m lonely and when it’s silent, I’ll think of death and how to achieve it. I wish I was normal, that I didn’t have these thoughts. I wish I could have changed the way my mind works, and how it always tells me to ruin things. I’ve lied to everyone I’ve talked to, I’ve insulted […]
Tag:
Suicidal Thoughts
today may 18 11:55 am and I’m in bed. I know I should be in school but I just had to think and I don’t have the strength to go and tell him my story. It’s just like a dream my dream came true. He asked me out and I said yes, but now I have to deal with telling him about my problems and that won’t be easy. I learn that he does it to, that he cuts himself as well as I do. And I told him that I cut and that he shouldnt cut. I made him promise me that he wouldn’t […]
I’m 35. Work as a mental health professional. It’s strange but all these years suicide was never something I ever contemplated in the slightest. I’ve never really been depressed. I don’t think I’m clinically depressed at the moment. Maybe burnt out and not in the best mood but by no means depressed.
Over the last few months I’ve realized that the decisions that I made to move to a new country have come with with a rash of problems that while not catastrophic have caused incredible stress, heartache, homesickness and problems advancing my career. I’m getting a feeling that some of these problems may well have […]
There have been several good episodes in my life, but as I look back I realize that the good ones would last just for a little while and the worst ones go on for years or will be there for the rest of my life.
A little more than 8 years ago I had a terrible car crash – I should be grateful about having survived with almost no injuries, but sometimes I wish I had died instantly instead because even prior to that I was a lonely freak and later on everything just got worse and worse.
So then I went to university and slipped deeper […]
Everyone just works their asses during Jr. High and High School so the can get good grades and go to college. Then once they’re in college, everyone works their asses off so they can get good grades and graduate and get a good job. Then everyone works their fucking asses off in their jobs so they can make money. Then once they have money they buy a big house but they can never come home to it, can they? That’s right because they’re too busy working their asses off to afford that house and cleaning ladies and putting their kids through school even though their […]
Okay so when I first started this, I had not one thing to say on it. Now I have a slight idea…
When I first joined The Suicide Project I was lonely, depressed. I had suicidal thoughts running through my mind, tormenting me. I have attempted suicide 5 times so far. My memories haunt my every waking moment and I cut my wrists and upper arms so deep that the scars will never heal. I would cry because I hated myself so much, I hated my looks, I thought I was the ugliest person alive, my weight to me 7 and a half pounds or 107ibs, I thought this […]
One of the things that’s stopping me from killing myself is the fact that I’ll be a corpse which will have to be disposed of. I know it’s stupid, but I hate the thought of being buried, but I also hate the thought of being cremated. I don’t want to be a corpse at all really, I just want to literally disappear into thin air. I’m not sure why this bothers me so much, because I know that my body’s basically just a shell of who I am, but it does. I don’t want to be a corpse and I’m not sure why I care […]
One of my friends had quite the bad day.
Some ***** from our school showed everyone her tumblr which was quite personal. She had stuff about her self harm and her suicidal thoughts. Now they’re all calling her an attention seeker and she’s so upset she won’t come back to school until Monday.
I feel like I should be doing something to help. I feel like I should be yelling at these dickheads and showing them my wrists to show that people who self harm are not attention seekers as we do our best to hide our cuts.
I want to be useful to her. I want to […]
Such a lonely day…for me, lonely days bring back the suicidal thoughts. It never fails…and im always lonely.
this is my first post so if i jibber-jabber to much i do apologize. im new at this the thought of a bunch of strangers reading this is still kind of weird but one of you might be or have been in the position im in and i would actually like to know the thoughts of someone that i guess can somewhat understand me. so here goes a bit of whats on my mind right now….
i get suicidal thoughts a lot lately. a couple days ago, i guess you can say i had a bit of a melt down. i was texting one of […]
Before I begin, if you might want to read my previous post for some context. Â http://suicideproject.org/2012/03/want-to-just-die/
I’m still here. Â Not much of an accomplishment really. Â Still depressed. Â Still having very suicidal thoughts. Â Not constantly, but it’s like they’re always there, waiting for me to have just one very bad day.
My ex and I were friends. Â The she just stopped returning my texts. Â I didn’t know why. Â Still not sure I do. Â About three weeks ago. Â I texted her and basically wouldn’t stop until she told me what was going on. Â All she said was that I can be annoying somtimes. Â I admit that sometimes this […]
It’s been at the back of my mind for a while. But now I’ve come to realise that it’s more than just suicidal thoughts. I’ve gotten to a point where I just have this really strong feeling that there’s something not right about me being alive. It’s not a result of bullying or any sort of trauma, it’s just a feeling, a really strong one. Over the past few weeks I’ve been putting myself through relatively dangerous “tests” to see whether I belong here or not. So far, I’ve survived them (clearly) but they’re not enough proof for me that I belong anymore. I just […]
i never thought my life would turn up to be so bad..my father was going through cancer had been with him throughout his treatment..but finally he passed away in january being the eldest in the family everything has come up to me.. I am 23 years old, and my fathers partner in business has been playing dirty tricks with me since my dad is not around. Theres noone to advice me now it has literally come to an extent where i get scared coming to office = i feel so waste feels like i hve nothing left in my life to do i just come […]
Today I was braver than I have been in a long time.
Last year I began starving and throwing up to lose weight. It became a major problem but I made sure no one told. It got better for a few weeks, then took a plunge in December. Coaches, teachers, and friends grew extremely concerned, but I tried making everyone believe I was fine. They saw through me and I started having routine visits to our guidance counselor to check up on me. I lied to her. She found out I lied. I was forced into counseling. At first, I thought I would try, but I […]
It seems as if though everything is getting better but I don’t know….. I am still sad…. Yet, I am happy too now. My so called “friend” is going around and saying that I’m knocked up… I can’t take more rumors…. I feel like breaking down and crying… I don’t know what to do anymore… I wish that someone could help me…. It seems as if no one can, though.. I am nothing really. Just a girl with a lot of problems… Nothing special about me really…. Being put down your whole life changes how you look at yourself…. I wish that I could smile […]
Not very sure how very origional or long this post is gonna be, but screw it I guess.
My name isn’t very important, but I can say that I’m a girl in the ages between 15 and 20. I’ve been thinking of posting something here for awhile, but it just hasn’t happened until now. Anyway, I think I’ve hated my life pretty much since first or second grade, or that’s at least when my misery began. I’ve never been bullied though, up til that point I was rather popular and people would fight over who was going to play with me, that too caused some problems, […]
the Suicide
Death dwells in the shadow just at your shoulder. You invited it in, you dined with it, you bathed with it, you lay with death.
Consumed by and consuming, death becomes both a path and a destination for you.
You write a final letter, a final note, and gulp down a bottle of pills, hoping it will all be over soon…
And then…
You wait…
But not long for as you soon take you final step…
You call for help.
But wait, this makes no sense?
Why would you wish for death, plan for death, and attempt to kill yourself only to give up and try to save yourself in […]
Finding It Hard To Find A Reason To Live. I Want So Badly To End The Way I’m Feeling Right Now. I’m So Invisible Everywhere I Go. I Don’t Have Any Friends Around Here. I Just Wish Someone Somewhere Would Listen To Me & Tell Me Everything Will Be Okay & I’m Worth It :/
hey
well i am 14 and about a year ago i took 20 paracetamols and ended up in hospital , my parents didnt know anything was wrong, you can imagine the suprise. I then a couple of months later went into old habbits and took 16 and the doctors told me that if i took anymore it would be fatal and i would die , i dont know if i want to but recently ive been getting more suicidal thoughts and its messing with me. I just dont know what to do ?!
Today I took about 6 depression quizzes, the last time i took them was a couple of months ago and back then the results were moderate depression, now it’s major depression and those results scare me. I’ve never considered telling anybody about my suicidal thoughts before, but after seeing those results… well now i think i want to get help, I’m just not sure how to do that, it’s not like i can just walk up to my parents and tell them that i think i have depression. What do i do? How do i approach my parents with this subject? Or maybe it’s possible […]