Has anyone ever felt as if they are just waiting to die? I have a job, great friends who love me, and no REAL reason to not enjoy life. I just cannot seem to get past this feeling that I have accomplished all I am going to, nothing interests me, and I am just wasting time until I die. Would love to come to terms with this and possibly get past it. I have done the therapy thing but to be honest it just seems to aggrivate me, being asked the same questions over and over. Any input, from anyone, is welcome. I have edited […]
Tag:
Suicide
I’m not a high school student who failed a test or was dumped by someone I had a crush on.
I’m not a twenty year old with no direction in life and alone.
I’m not thirty years old, single, unmarried, with a mediocre job and a mortgage.
I’m 44 years old… that’s important to know.
When I first killed myself, I was 18. After I was brought back, everyone told me that life would get better–that all I had to do was just hang in there for a little while longer.
When I attempted to kill myself at 27, everyone told me that life would get better and all I […]
Nothing feels real.
A lot of the time I get caught up on details and abstractness. On how we’re just clumps of atoms shoved together in a world which means nothing.
It makes suicide seem much less scary and guilt ridden. People die all the time. I don’t matter. I don’t want to matter. My pain only exists in my head and it’s all arbitrary.
We’re all tending towards dead anyway.
Ever get the feeling that you have no point? I do. Every day. In my eyes, I am just one more person to add to the fucking shitload of people around me. I have dealt with severe depression for 5 years, tried all the shit that I thought might help (councilor, friends, drinking, smoking, pot, parents, cutting, burning, bulimia, anorexia, and pills), and tried suicide countless times. But who gives a shit, really? I mean, theres 100,000 of people exactly like me. It doesnt matter what I accomplish or what I believe. Sure, I think people can achieve greatness. But only 1/1000 people […]
hello. it has been so long since i have even been one here. since april actually. but i decided to come back on.
i feel done with life. im not living anymore. im just the walking dead, like a zombie. literally. i cant concentrate on anything. and ill probably be made to go to rehab soon because i couldnt stop smoking weed. well i dont really care. im planning on killing myself before that happens. i know for a fact that i can never be happy again. thats just never gonna happen. im just completely done. i dont even want to be around my best […]
I am 23 years old. Â I am a new to this forum. Â The reason I joined is because I feel relentlessly hopeless like all of you. Â I feel I no longer have an escape. Â I have burned all my previous ties with my family and friends, and I have not had a social life in over 2 years. In fact, I do not even leave the house anymore. Â I am alone, in debt, and miserably empty.
In High school I had an extremely fruitful social life.  At the age of 18 I was slowly covered by a blanket of  torturous anxiety. The anxiety is strictly social. […]
I have always believed that Suicide is a personal choice and that it should be a lawful and valid answer for any ADULT (sorry, there is SOOOOO much drama during the teen years that if legal EVERYONE would commit suicide) that is in so much physical or psychological pain that they just want out.
If you are in so much physical pain – from an illness, injury, birth defect, etc. – that day-to-day life is a struggle and you are in constant unbearable pain, I believe that if all else has failed and you CHOOSE suicide, then you should be supported in your decision.
If you are […]
Hello guys, (edit: why is my post all written in green? its hard to read :S highlighting the text with your mouse helps)
I’ve been thinking about suicide pretty much my entire life. This is going to be quite straight up but bear with me. First, let’s talk a bit about myself so you now a little bit more about who’s writing this.
I am now 23 years old, on my last year of university here in Quebec, Canada. I’ve been studying marketing since I’ve always been really good at selling and customer service. My real passions, however, are sports, videogames and marijuana. Yes, marijuana. I won’t […]
I can’t take it anymore! All that’s left for me in life is a gun. I’m never going to acomplish anything in life, and even if I do, I won;t even begin to compare with my dear sister’s acomplishments. I don’t see the point in living if all that goes throught my head is depression and confusion. Confusuin to what I am. I know I like other girls, and my friends have accepted that, but am I bi or Lesbian. Bi is one thing, but would they accept lesbian? Not only that, but this is my last year of freedom. I’,m pretty much out at […]
Why is this blogging site called THE SUICIDE PROJECT, what do they mean by project. Is this a site studying emotions of dpressed people. I know I will get a lot of rage comments but I would like to know. It sounds stupid just reading it over. But still I wish to know
Everyone has troubles. It’s life. Everyone endures bullshit from time to time. Though some, in fact, are worse than others. I’ve never told anyone any of this before. And to be honest, I’m scared. I’m afraid of being judged. Of being misunderstood in my story. But I’ll tell you.
Here goes nothing.
I’m seventeen years old, and a senior in high school. I’ve always made decent grades, and am well liked by most people. I’m the funny chunky girl. Here’s the catch. I’m dying on the inside. I feel so.. broken. So lost. And to be honest, I’ve felt this way for years. I put a smile […]
tommorows the big day!!!I got ahold of my moms box cutter the other night.Earlier that day i found some numbing stuff.its for teeth but i think if i put it on the blade itll numb the area for awhile.I probably should pay atenttion to my rule of not drawing atenttion to myself.But im not going to kill myself at home.I scared the fuck out of everybody with sleeping pills.If im around strangers and i dont know if thats good or bad thing.But then itll be easier.Im falling apart. Just yesterday i couldve been killed walking off at home att night.There was a guy in the […]
I realize in two days from now.Its going to be as scary as hell for me.Carrying around a box cutter is going to be scary as hell.Even if you intend to only harm yourself.Authorities get involved and its not pretty cause cops dont know how to handle the mentally ill.They do that thing were they twist your arm behind your back.It hurts cause you think your arm might break off.
My hope is that i dont get shot cause there will probably be police since they dont know how to mind there own business.
The thing is i just cant please […]
I know very soon i will start an attempt but this will be a little different.Pills almost did me in about a week ago.i told the psych at er id try again in two weeks guess shell be seeing me again.Anyway i have this image of slicing a line with my moms box cutter starting at the elbow going straight down almost to the wrist.
But thats not what i want to talk about.
I want to talk about what the key making dcisions and steps you need to determine wether you can actually go through with it or not.
1. can […]
All my life I have heard the phrase, “It gets better”, well I am living proof that no it does not, at least it hasn’t in my experience. If my life was going to get better, and stop from spiraling out of control, then wouldn’t it have gotten at least a little bit better by now? I mean it has been over six years, and nothing has changed, it has only gotten worse. I’m tired of living, of my suicide attempts failing, only to wake up from yet again another failure, whilst the madness and chaos that is my life resumes. No one cares about […]
Well today’s the day. Sunday. The plan was to end my life tonight. Leaving a couple different notes addressed to different people. I’ve wanted to do this for a long time. Planning since the beginning of the school year, which started August 27, the day before my birthday. The plan was to wait until after my parents went to sleep, then go do it. My method is not the most preferred method out there, in fact many people hate it and think it’s like THE WORST one. But I have my reasons and I have tried twice before, failing obviously. Waking up in a hospital room surrounded […]
So a school person found out about my suicide and I was sent to the school spycologyest.
And she was like:
“You know if you kill yourself, you go to hell, right?
I was angry with this. I have always had religion in my face, and I almost blew up here.
Then she was like, “What do you have to do tonigh?8
A orchestra concert,” I said.
“What if you kill yourself today or tomorrow?”
Then they sent me to a hospital place for a month.
Do you think she was trying to control me or actually help me? It seemed like it was more for […]
Passed my point and pushed to suicide, im going to have somemore Fun, b4 i die.. its just really comforting knowing when,how and where i will die.. only a few more weeks i hope.. if not a few more days.
I’m a fifteen year old girl in the 10th grade and I have never felt so miserable in my entire life. I’m tired of being that optimistic girl that fakes a smile for the sake of everyone else. Most of my friends know about my depression but they think I’m okay at the moment. Last night I was almost positive I wanted to die, but instead of acting on the instinct to kill myself, I just lied in bed shaking and crying. I could never tell my mom that I feel like I want to die sometimes because it would either break her heart or […]
I guess I should start with a statement of “I know that I”m a really lucky person, and life, while not perfect, had been nice to me.” I am born in a really developed country, and have so many benefits that many other countries doesn’t have. I am gifted and loved by god in many ways (learned how to read a language through watching TV, drawings that had won numerous awards and got me a 60,000 scholarship money, performed dance for the Winter Olympics, top three in my school, an hourglass figure, decent face, and healthy body with no mutations…etc.) But I don’t see a […]