Not sure why, but I just dont want to be alive anymore. I get depressed like this so much, and I just want it to stop. I have thought about suicide way too many times and its just ridiculous to me that I would let myself get this way…. I just dont see anything good in my future. I wish I had to power to give my life to someone else who really does want it, because I dont. Have you ever kinda hoped someone would mug you? nah? I have. I’ve been waiting for quite some time for something to happen to me, where […]
Tag:
Suicide
I’m new to this. I’ve been researching things concerning suicide. I’ve been depressed for 2 years. I have no friends. And Im ugly,and no one likes me. I’m not saying that just to make myself feel bad, it’s the truth. If I could, I would type 100 facts about no one does.this is my only post on here. Because today is my last day to live. I can’t take it no more. I blame it all on school. All i asked for was to be homeschooled, but…looks like no one listened. Good bye fellow “friends” enjoy this so called “wonderful” life. Peace.
It’s been a couple of months since the last time I wrote here. For awhile I was feeling better, but now I feel even worse then I did before. The last time that I wrote here for me suicide was just something that I kept thinking about, but I wasn’t ready to do it, I was just too scared of dying. Now I think that I’m ready, or at least I’m not scared anymore because I know that whatever will come after death it’s going to be different from how I’m living now. Anyway there are two reasons why I’m writing here now, but since […]
What you always hear is, how much your family would feel if you died by suicide. And how disappointed and sad they will be, etc.
But when you die you will never find out how they felt. Because you’re dead. So when they say you should not do it because of the family.
Then in principle, you do not have to care.
Can anyone feel me?
I apologize if I offended anyone with this post
I’ve finally finished reading through all my posts on here in the last three years.
ALL 101.
It honestly doesn’t seem like I’ve been doing this for that long, writing on here. It seemed like just yesterday I didn’t know what I was going to do with all my thoughts and feelings of suicide, keeping them wrapped up in my head could only keep me sane for so long and I was afraid I was going to lose it completely, more so then I already had.
Then I found this site, a place where I could get all my feelings out, where I could talk to others who […]
I have been struggling with self hatred and poor self esteem for most of my life. It is through a change in friends and family that I have surrounded myself with positive, truly amazing people. I didn’t think life could be lived happily. But it can. I used to cut on myself, I used to do drugs and drink, among many other self destructive behaviors. But it was through the death of my mother through which I know was suicide related, even through my family lists it as “undetermined” that a new path has been made for me. I am now a Christian, I am […]
or it certainly seems and feels like I will.
I have had mental health problems for years now and I have always actively tried to help myself. I have always sought help and have been medicated for a long time. I think it was hard because I was never ill enough for it to be noticed by anyone but ill enough for it to interfere with my life daily.
I just hate myself. Every time I close my eyes, my mind is screaming for me to end it. I just cant do it any more and I have no other choice. I have never visualised myself being […]
This only applies to my own perception and not to anyone else’s. Do not want to be accused of trying to play the should game.
Seems everything is built around taking suffering and moving on. And those who choose not to are referred to as weak. I disagree. Sometimes people just get tired of the pain and the pleasure that does come is not enough.
No positive thinking or positive action will save one from all malevolence, and as ridiculous as that may sound to many people, I’d prefer a life free from any trouble.
Most trouble has no point and the ones that teach lessons are only […]
And boy, BOY am I doing it wrong.
I have no traumatic past, troubling future (at least in anyone else’s view), or any of these other socially acceptable reasons for despair. I grew up with a normal family, normal income, normal everything. I really have nothing to complain about in my past. But, holy shit that’s what sucks. I am fucking bored out of my mind with everything. Everything is so bland, unappealing, status quo, daily grind.
So, obviously it’s not particularly anybody’s fault for my current predicament, except for myself. But that’s the funny thing. I readily accept the fact that I have driven my […]
If you think about it.. people always care when you die, they cry and get sad.. but do they really care about you?
NO.. Personally, i don’t feel loved. If i died… nobody would care. People say that all the time i know, but honestly. If only you could live in my shoes, oh my.. I don’t even know. I’m just so lonely, i have people in my life yes, but they don’t care. I DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW TO LOVE, WHAT IS LOVE? I’ve never known it. It’s funny because if you saw me, you wouldn’t think that. I’m so bubbly and outgoing but […]
They dont know how badly i want to die. I’m suffocating. Every day is a battle. I think about how easy it is for me to just overdose or cut to deep. dont want to feel pain anymore.I dont want to be stuck here. I can’t do this anymore. I just want someone to notive how much I’m hurting. It hurts so deeply its a struggle to breathe.i cut to take away the pain for awhile. But when it’s this bad i cant do anything. I’m a basket case. I hate it here. I just want to be free of myself. I am […]
i always write here when i feeling some type of way, and right now i do.
I hate the fact that i think about suicide 24/7. when i do something bad, when someone yells at me, when my parent argue, when i get bad grades, when i look at myself in the mirror, when im standing next to my best friend, when people are starring at me, anything. I really feel like im going to commit suicide on march 31st. Â I have a gut feeling i am, im just so really ready to die. im so ready for all of this to just stop, im not […]
Everything humanity has achieved will one day be forgotten, that day might not come for billions of years but everything will end, everything will be destroyed… celebrities that some say will never be forgotten will be forgotten by time. What is it exactly that humanity has trying to achieve? because I would much rather be a caveman then live in the world we live in today.. fucked up is an understatement.
Even if I do commit suicide and ”hurt” my loved ones, the fact is that those ”loved ones” will eventually die too.. nothing lasts for ever… and I quite like that fact.
I am a little bit ashamed i am here now. I am not thinking about suicide again, at least not so often. I just have this constant feeling of being down.
I am sometimes thinking i am not capable of feeling good or enjoying life. I have those episodes of euphoria when something incredible happens and when life surprises me spontaneously. But i feel they are terribly rare. I know i have no reason to be unhappy because i have so many things and new people around me and i even learned to be happy because of others. I also tried to talk about my problems […]
If i could find the courage to kill myself, this is what my death message will say!! ver.1.0
I decided that I didn’t want to be a sufferer any more and took on this terrible selfishness that is probably hurting you right now! The selfishness took over me and I couldn’t get over feeling sorry for my broke life. I don’t want you guys to feel sorry for me, because I don’t deserv it for selfishly killing myself, and maybe hurting you in the long run!! I am sorry that you had encountered me in your life for why I terribly just killed my self! Please […]
I always wonder, what would life be like if i was more….appealing, attractive, pretty…you know? i wonder if my life would be different, and if i would have all these suicidal thoughts. Personally i think everything would be better. The reason i get treated like shit now is because the way i look. I think if i was pretty, more people would respect me and treat me better. The other day i realized how much i hate myself. i realized that maybe im ugly, because i have ugly thoughts. or maybe because i just do horrible things. Im just an horrible person. Im so selfish […]
I also read somewhere that for people that believe in re incarnation (not sure wat I believe in) that if some one commits suicide they most likely have done it in anOther life. So that got me to thinking maybe I gave don’t it..if its true..and maybe I’m supposed to since I have such strong feelings about it. Then ill live again in another life only with no knowledge of this life and maybe everything will be alright
Today at school, I found out a boy commited suicide last night. He was a year older than me but i saw him frequently in the hallway. I am very shocked to know that this boy was hurting so bad that he felt he needed to do this. He seemed to be always smiling! I know that people are going to talk for months on end about him. I can already hear “was it that kid that had no friends?” Why must people be so cruel? I did not know this boy but i feel like i could of prevented his death. “Only if..” Are the […]
Hi.. my history is not really about suicide, but i went very close to that, and sometimes i still think about it, but i know i wont succeed.
Sorry for my english, my main lenguague is portuguese, and i’ll try my best here to express my feelings, or whatever this is.
I mean i dont feel nothing about the world, i dont feel nothing, really, i just try to picture myself in every kind of life and i just dont get excited about anything, i look around and i picture big zeros, like nothing matters.
Everything can happen to me, that i wont care.
I get angry all the […]
for about 5 years now i have had a struggle with depression, and only in the past 2 years or so have people found out about it. i’ve attempted to kill myself several times but never found the strangth to do it.
when people first found out about my depression they where absolutely shocked. It didn’t make sense to them, i was always the one helping other people with their problems. Hell i wanted to be a social worker or child psychologist for the sole reason of helping people with those problems. But now…. now everything just looks bleak.
today after a fairly minor argument […]