By now you might have seen on the Internet the story of one “Jeremy Meeks” who has recently gained a reputation as “Hot Felon.” He has been the center of much attention after his mugshot was released showing what many consider to be a very attractive face. The purpose of my writing here is not to take a shot at Mr. Meeks. I hope that he will receive whatever punishment his crimes are due, certainly that he should repay his thefts, and other than that I have no concern towards him. It is what this man’s story has revealed so clearly about our deranged and unjust society, which I take interest in. My blood does […]
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the world
I absolutely hate it when people say things like “suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem” or “it gets better” or “everyone has hard times, you just have to get past it”. I totally understand that most people who say these things have great intentions, and are just trying to make me feel better or inspire me to keep living and I 100% am grateful for that, for them trying to help, for them trying to understand but that doesn’t make those sayings sound any less stupid to me. And that’s not to say that I don’t love the people saying those things […]
Hello again. It’s been a long time, three or four years I think, since I was last here. I’m grateful for the rest at least.
I’ve fallen back into old thoughts, old habits. It’s scary how easy it is. Maybe ‘comfortable’ is the wrong word but it’s so … I don’t know it’s like shrugging on that threadbare jacket at the back of the closet the one you never wear in public but the one that makes you feel right. And the pressure is held back for a time because I know how to work within these boundaries, these battle lines are familiar. It’s me against […]
Seeking the land, Ouroboros clan.
Planet going down, planet going down.
I am that I am, the one that I seek, am I the only.
Do you understand, in the hands of faith, Salvation.
All that I can say, is to repeat myself.
Vowed to celestial, a beast of hell.
My asphyxiating spirit, it hurts so much.
Forsaken, they call them the ‘Morlocks’.
From underground, one day, they escaped to the island of Genosha. A promised haven for the outcasts of the world, but it was a trap. There, they were captured and held prisoners as enslaved fugitives unable to reach back out to the world. It […]
today someone said something about, in hell where at the bottom depths, lies magical sands with the power to bring forth great fortune.**
by Bisban
written by Bisban
So what… Keep trying, uh? The story must begin with a crew. The “bebop” genre description describes it all fully well. I don’t know exactly how it goes…. somewhere along outside the box, but not really. But anyway, as I’ve mentioned, I am here seeking the ‘Pilgrimage’, becoming my tribal name of faith. A tribal, that’s what it’s suppose to be about. Me and my own one in a million, fated. I read elsewhere how like… Wiccan is referred to as a way of life, which then made more sense to me, based, on the living myth.
Oblivious. A suffering fetus. Mother, cow, a celestial mind. […]
I feel I don’t exist and don’t have anyone to talk or to relate to. I feel invisible to the world. The only time people do notice me, is when out in public and I’m going thru my anxiety attacks. Yeah.. they notice alright. They either laugh, call me crazy, or walk away from me if they near by. It’s so embarrassing! I don’t know what brings them on, that’s why I try to stay self medicated when I go out. I’ve tried medicine for all of my disorders or illnesses, including the Anxiety, but they either make me feel worse or I can’t function […]
Maybe suicide is the solution. Everyone always says it’s not, but nobody but me is actually worthless. Every other person in this world has worth and I can see that in them. But then, I look at me and I see nothing but worthlessness. I am not worth anything to anyone and if you don’t know me, you can’t say that “you would be sad if I died”, because I can guarantee that if you met me, you would think I am annoying, stupid, worthless, ugly, etc. Everyone else always has. you don’t have to deny it. There’s […]
I need to heal, and travel to the icy end of the continent.
Humble, the express; no longer want to wait.
Come on, with the golden nimbus machine, summon the story of death.
Free my dying soul, forever to celestial. I am that I am, see with your eye.
A beast of hell. Who I am, an exiled human child. Faith is a haunted ghost.
Uttermost, gutter-most, oblivious. A beast of hell, a worldly.
Seven billion and nobody. Everyone, gone. All that is so much wrong.
Escape the world. Forever lost. Until the next saga.
Oracle of faith. Save me today.
Oracle, where are you. The apex, so- so long ago.
I have done my time. Now, faith is in the hand.
Do not defect me any longer. You, touch of life.
Grand goddess. Twist the codex, today. One, for transcendence.
A war of heaven versus hell, lost, our beginning.
It makes no sense. Fish, a world without a true leader.
Oh, other woman, take us to the land.
Carrying the boulder, of the world. Heal, to become strong.
But here, but now, forever lost.
Born to protect the world, now the devil’s.
We’ve exiled your alien, do not come back to our planet.
The star […]
This is beginning to be too much. The world has been so dark and hopeless for the past year. I can’t figure out what’s wrong with me. I keep telling myself, “You’re fine. Get the fuck out of bed, and live your life.” only to discover that I have no motivation. I tell myself I do, but I don’t. After the stress, the tears, the panic attacks, the breakdowns. I can’t bring myself to admit that I need help. I don’t need help. I just don’t. I can’t bring myself to even talk to people anymore. Everyone thinks I’m mad at them, but ever since […]
I dream of a world where people can just try to understand each other, rather than judge them for their problems. A world where no one is criticized for who they are and what they love. Unfortunately, a world of peace doesn’t exist.
I dream that I am on my own planet, where there is no misery, violence, hatred or discrimination, with only my closest friends, family members, animals and people who get me. Like I said… I dream. If only dreams could come true for those of us […]
So I’ve suspected what was coming for a few weeks and had plenty of time to contemplate what would happen. My love finally told me last night she wasn’t coming home to me and that she needed a divorce. Unfortunately she’s halfway around the world “defending our country” and I’m left home keeping her house ready for her for the next couple months. Of course when she gets back I’ll need to leave my life behind. My family, house, sanity becomes hers. She’s not angry and has been talking to me about getting help but it doesn’t help. I’m currently in therapy and on meds […]
You know the time right after a really heavy rainstorm? When it’s quiet and peaceful and all of the ugliness is over – Honestly, I’ve always been a little afraid of heavy rainstorms, especially when there’s lightening and thunder. But I love when it’s over – I like to stand outside and smell the fresh air, and breathe a sigh of relief – not nervous anymore. I’m hoping that’s what we’ve finally come to – the end of the thunderstorm. I don’t want to be nervous anymore. It has been what I have dubbed “the winter of our discontent” – a seemingly endless series of […]
I’m off with the world, things have gotten so much worse in a couple of days; my remedy – the last working medicine gives me no avail anymore. Chest pains and the difficulty to breathe is too much. Have to get to my car and end it in a matter of days.
Why does this unjustified destiny come across for someone who has no reasonable desire to kill himself otherwise than that of the irreversible condition – and a deadly one of course. This will be hard on my family, but I’ve ruined almost every relationship beforehand already – love and hate for all, I believe […]
is world going to miss me or I going to miss the world?
I feel I am going to miss human struggle and pain – That is another reason Why I am procrastinating my last day on this planet
I’ve been swimming upstream my whole life. Nothing was ever given to me, no brakes, no guidance, no chance. I’m middle aged now with 2 teens and a wife. I have no job and have been looking since April. Credit is bad, no savings, and I’m over qualified for the “regular” jobs. I get bored out of my mind with work and am on a spiritual mission. I’ve prayed and asked for truth for all mankind, a unselfish prayer for a long time now. The world is filled with violence and seems that it is filled with selfishness. This life is absolutely unreal, if there […]
Tonight I found myself driving my brother home because my uncle had made a statement implying that we’re both wasters living off the state. My brother was seething with anger and rejected the notion but for me it’s put things into perspective. All my life I’ve made excuses for myself and thought that I should be judged less harshly because I have a learning disability and suffer from anxiety and depression. I thought my family should love me no matter what. But now I realise the world doesn’t give a fuck about my problems, my weaknesses, or the bad cards it’s dealt. Â I can’t afford […]
Id like to share from an existential level and some insights that have occurred. Â I have explored numerous modalities to tap into that higher awareness our world so readily speaks about. Â And yes, I have had amazing experiences… But nevertheless, one always returns to the world of man.
i hear many spiritual teachers say that this planet is a school, a place to learn for souls, and that we create our experience before we entered the womb of our biological human mother.but honestly, what I see, is this logic is pure bullshit, cloaked and lessened with the same idea of man: that one must struggle to exist, […]
Hello All,
I m new to this site
Why cant please my GOD i do the things i dnt want to do as apostle paul said, But I love GOD but not able to please him , i feel loneliness in the world fear to speak with people evryone in the world are cruel no humans exists , sometimes i feel myself lost many tyms felt ending up my life, I lov BIBLE, JESUS , My god father but i m sinner i m lost , y cant god help me and stop me from sining , He left me alone in this cruel selfish world, I […]
Here, in oblivion. Maybe, I’ll find another chance.
I’m afraid there’s nothing more to say.
I’m not make belief, I’m a kid dying.
The holy spirit is the most beautiful.
I will go, before the solstice, if I can. I must.
The leaf is ripped in my hand. Omega-death.
Do not let me hang by the neck, any longer.
That’s the cruelest satanic shit. Fuck narcissist.
Those motherfuckers took over the world. Some fucked up breed of killers.
But now, it’s a whole other breed. My heart since the beginning, with the animals.
I need to be able to breathe, I can, if you let […]