so did anyone feel you are live in different world , i mean the way i think and the way other think is just different , i love random thing, i love weird thing, my curiosity is limitless i want to know more and more, but people around me just be like ” dude you are really weird, try be normal like the others , or you are so stupid and what are you doing is useless” and other thing like that , they are bullying me cause of that , iam not super smart or talented man, but i just want to be […]
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So this week I went jogging with that girl again and she talked about her studies and that she’s taking a programming course as well. I said if she needed any help she could tell me even though I didn’t think she’d actually take my offer. Today she asked if we could meet up for an hour so I could explain some stuff to her, and in return she said she’d invite me to have lunch with her at some restaurant downtown. We’re gonna meet tomorrow to talk about the programming stuff, and I’m not sure whether she’ll want to go have lunch right after […]
uhm hi everyone,im new here.so last summer i tried to kill myself with pills but i failed and ended up in hospital for 2 weeks.i was diagnosed with major depression.my whole family thinks this is some kind of joke,they think that theres no way i could be depressed bc im just a teen and its so disgustin and annoying.my parents are horrible.theyre calling me names and expect too much.i cry almost everynight because i cant get their words oyt of my head.my mom thinks “i’ve everything” but to her everything is money and material stuff.they never tried talking to me and always act like everything […]
I’m not a serious person at all. The only time I am serious is in writing. I don’t understand how everyone can live knowing all their happiness is a delusion. It’s impossible for me. Funny how everyone tries to be something, something they think important, when it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter if you die today or in forty years, because some day everything will parish and it will be as if the human race, and everything else, never had even existed.
Today is the 2 week mark that I haven’t taken pain killers. I AM CRAVING THEM SO BAD. But in their place I am cutting myself more and drinking more. Whatever I can do to try to make the pain go away. I miss the pills, like I miss the effect. I didn’t feel anything, I didn’t think about anything. I just sat there. And I like not thinking, because I don’t think of all the bad things. I don’t have to remember everything that I’m trying to forget. But I am trying to stop cutting myself, so when i wear short sleeves i wont […]
I’ve dealt with a lot of trauma and terror in my life, and there was only one thing that kept me remotely sane… A love for one person.
I grew up with very limited options and fewer trusting individuals. Everything I was taught in the educational system were lies, especially on moral standards. Even my family disowned me the moment I was raped…
But one person stuck around when I needed them most… and then they decided I wasn’t good enough to be with them…
They lied to me, leading me on making me believe that there was ever a chance between us, only to find he never […]
Hi, i’m back here. Again. I was watching TV and I saw somebody who made me feel bad. It made me think about a person I used to know, somebody I stopped seeing. A “friend”. Yeah, you know those friends you hang out with because you’re too young and too insecure to think by yourself and to trust yourself. This person who hangs out with you because you’re enough hopeless and in a shitty state that you make her/him feel better about her/his own person. To be clear, I do not miss that person at all. She’s a complete wreck with all the pride only […]
I have a boyfriend who loves me, as well as a grandmother and friends who do so, too. So why do I feel so urged to commit suicide? Y’know what I think about sometimes? A scenario where everyone hates me, and has moved on. That way, I’d be able to kill myself, and it be more of a selfless act. I know I can’t die with things being the way they are now, and it’s not like I plan on making people hate me, I only wish I didn’t care so much about the ones in my life, so that I could do this without […]
I have not had suicidal thoughts. However, I know the pain of loneliness and the feeling of being hated and not being wanted. I know other people that have had suicidal thoughts. It is not worth it. There are many other alternatives for the pain, and there are many other people who care for you, even if you don’t think so. And if you think you do know that there is no one that cares for you, you still have one person. Me. I may not know who you are or what you look like, but I can tell you that you are a living, […]
Why do we try? One swipe, one, stab, one shot and its over. No more hassles, no more fight, no more struggle. No more isolation, depression, desperation, no more thoughts. Just action, commitment, sacrifice. It would be worth it. I don’t want relief. I know I’ll never get it, why wishful think? I’m beyond relief. Relief is something thats there, yet out of reach. There is only numbness left for me, but even thats a feeling. So nothing would be better than this! Cause what we [at least I] have is worse than nothingness, worse than death! So, why try? When we could be dead […]
I’m a 15 year old Sophomore in highschool.
I don’t believe in God, so I don’t believe in heaven or hell. I think the only reason people “love” God is because they don’t want to risk going to hell IF God is real. Humans act on self interest, right?
Back to suicide, I plan on commiting suicide after I graduate high school. I’m not depressed at all, and there is no underlying depression, but I just think life is pointless. You work hard in highschool so you can go to college and work hard so you can get a job, and then you work hard for the […]
I think that a lot of our hate towards ourselves comes from the comparison game that we play. Facebook and instagram and tumblr. All of the images and the posts and the videos we see of peoples lives on these sites are luxurious and “better than ours”. We compare ourselves so much to these people…..
“oh, she’s so pretty, why can’t I be that pretty”
“oh, she’s so skinny, why can’t I be that thin”
“oh they are skydiving”
“oh they have a huge house” ……… so on and so forth
We are all constantly comparing ourselves to the people that are just like us, […]
I think life is really beautiful, but I’m really depressed. There is so much crap going on in the world right now, and yet, there is an equal number of good things. Watching the news makes me think about why life is even important. But beautiful moments like a person saving another person by sacrificing his or her life, or a new wonderful scientific discovery, makes me think that maybe, humanity is not completely lost. Maybe there is hope.
I don’t think there can be many feelings as bad as living in an absolute hell. But I’m not sure what’s hell about it. Living with people I love but – think I got it.
Living a miserable life, so bad that all my effort and will power goes into making me look slightly gloomy at the best of times. My head pounds and my bones ache from the pressure.
I value the people around me more than anything – but sometimes I don’t think they even care about me – what’s behind the façade.
The only time I can have a decent conversation with one of my […]
Starting my year as the chairperson of our student organisation. No time to think about suicide now. Besides, people need me.
Hopefully you, too, find meaning to your life! 🙂
Hey, sorry its been a while since I last posted on here It’s been busy over on my end with the holidays, work, and finishing the college transfer process….
I start at my new college on Monday I’m double majoring in Broadcasting and Art Therapy. I loved my old college but with what happened my freshman year even if I remained there I would never move up and be happy in what I want to do. I truly hope the friends I made there will understand why.
So pretty much I am starting off with a clean slate and a new chapter. Its kind of funny cause […]
I just had a friend tell me that it takes on average 3-6 months for someone to get a new job. I was fired on November 20th and have been on 11+ interviews with only one offer and it was for something I didn’t feel safe doing. I’m not even having the suicidal car crash fantasies but I ache right now. I see a therapist in about a week for an intake appointment and then maybe in a month I’d see a new psychiatrist for a med adjustment, but I know I need to go to the hospital. I just promised my husband that I’d […]
Funny how everyone in this world even the ones you think are “close” to you can never read the fake smile… Funny how everyone thinks everything is peachy when really it’s all a living hell!!
Hi. This is actually my first time to do this kind of thing. Like, asking for help regarding my depression so im having a hard time telling this. Im a 14 yrs old girl. Im really depressed. I cut too due to a lot of reasons. People see me as the jolly, cheerful, happy girl but it’s totally the opposite. Im struggling everyday. Whenever im sad or when i feel like crying, I just keep it inside, i don’t show emotions. For a week now, everyday i’ve thought of comitting suicide, i’ve searched on ways but, I really don’t want to end my life yet. […]
I think we all have a common trend of abuse… physical… sexual.. I don’t want to die it would hurt the one person that really cared but was too afraid to let me know. I think we all have that person… My bf died in 2011 as I was a senior. Woke up and he was dead. I’m ok now just feel alone and sometimes think about how lucky he is to be above the clouds.. free.. one day when it’s my turn to go but not yet. He was raped at 6 years old and only told me 4days before he took his last […]