Most people say cheerleaders are sluts, perfection, skinny, and easy. But we aren’t all like that. We are all human we all make mistakes and fight our own battles. I’m an elite and school cheerleader; I am anorexic, on medication for depression and anxiety, and I was diagnosed with OCD. So think before you judge a cheerleader just cause we act confident in our own skin doesn’t mean we are.
think
Hello everyone =D
Aw…I went to psychiatrist this morning…as I expected he offered medicines for a treatment (therapy sucks)…I didn’t accepted, I just told him I’ve been planning suicide for months, he was very understanding, I didn’t think he believed me though.
Well, I’m going to do tomorrow, problably (it isn’t up to me, I need my family to go out for some hours).
I planned to inhale cook gas, which is very toxic because it’s not natural gas.It’s painless…
I talked to my mom, tried to give her some confort, get the things less painful to her, I know she will get hurt anyway…obviously […]
I still remember how boring and empty my life was before i met him , and how when we started getting together it was just for fun ,wasn’t planning to ever fall for him or think the way im thinking right now ,i fell so hard i was ready to do anything literally ANYTHING ,and then he slightly started to back off ,its like he did that in purpose he just had this need to kill someone mentally for no reason ,he just left me without saying anything after he started to act mean ,i know he’s not mean i just dont know why! He […]
How come there are not more people that think about suicide? Do they not live in this world? Do they not see what we see?
I really dont feel like i have a place in this world.. i was born to die young.. I just know it. I always think of myself and i cant do anything righ, i cant help people in any way.. I always push people away from me its pretty bad.. I just really dont have a talent. Im not smart. I cant write stories i cant sing i cant cheer anymore i messed my knee up. i cant help people out. i just cant do anything right. I dont want anybody to pity me thats the last thing i want.. if anybody watched the twilight […]
I think I have come to the conclusion that my social awkwardness has gone so far as to affect my relationship. I just can’t seem to communicate with him. I tried talking to him again last night. No extreme drama from me this time. Well at least I don’t think. Anyway, I told him that I just felt like a huge failure and that I can’t find any good worth in myself. I have been hearing from my mom for many years how she almost died giving birth to me and how her pregnancy with me was just terrible because she gained over 40 pounds […]
I hate when people say that, too much pseudo-science and New Age ideologies are floating around and causing people to think that their suffering is a product of manifestation that somehow, their “soul” has made a contract with before coming to earth. If you believe in that new age shit, or even Christianity, all of it is filled with lies & hypocrisy. “You create your won reality” my ass, bio centrism doesn’t prove shit.
You ever feel numb inside and you just dont want to anything, Â you think about how many people you have hurt you know that you put them through so much pain. You know inside that you should just find a way to get your mind off of things but you turn your music up but your head phones on and all you think about is dying. All you want to do die. Lay in the road…JUST GET OUT OF THE WORLD.. Your ex text you and you just want to cry.. You just want to grab your blade but then you remember you flushed them […]
I’ve been dealing with depression for half my life. Originally I thought that getting out of my parents house would help. there, I lived constantly waiting for the next incident, next fight, and the only way I ever learned to walk was on eggshells. I tried diving into painting, but it didn’t always work. By the time I graduated high school, I was cutting, throwing up and eating as little as possible almost every day.
I thought that moving away and attending college would help, but instead things only got worse. All of my bad behaviors became more frequent, to the point that they actually caused […]
in order to overcome it you have to have hope that you can. On an unrelated,and quite weird note, sometimes i think about something and then i think about thinking about that something and my brain gives up. for instance i’m thinking about writing this while thinking about the other times when i thought too much and made my brain hurt. Ridiculous.
Life does suck day in and day out. That’s just how it goes. Unfortunately, (and I know I say that a lot) we don’t really have a lot of control over it. Shit happens and you may get depressed… You may cut. You may even think about taking your own life away just so you don’t have to deal with anymore of it. But think, that boyfriend or girlfriend who just cheated on you, that boss that just fired you, or those damn teenagers who bully you whether it’s all the time or just once, can always fuck off and get lost. Stay strong guys.
Full-alert here, if you are going to try to bash me, insult me, or talk me out of this, please leave this thread. I am not asking for your judgement or opinions. You are not me, you have not lived my life, and so you have no right to decide what I should do with it Second warning, this is a very long post. Please bear with me.
Okay, after getting that point across, I was wondering the certain fatality doses for prescription medications. I am trying to garner as much information from people as possible, so if you know any other websites/forums where I won’t […]
Most days, I don’t think I’m addicted to cutting. I can get by without it, but then sometimes, I can’t breathe or think until I let the blood flow. Does anyone else feel like that? We don’t have enough alcohol in our house for me to have an addiction (my mom only drinks wine) but I never want to hang out with my friends unless we can drink or smoke.
So, I’m about to return to school in a few days, and I’m supposed to contact my counselor upon arrival to set up our first appointment of the semester. But I’m torn. You see, I’ve already gone way over the “limit” of visits supposed to be available to students, so I am beginning to feel like I have no right to continue going. Plus, it’s been almost a year of consistent visits, and at this point, I feel like I just talk in circles, but my level of depression remains consistent, even despite changes I make in my life. I am trying so hard, but […]
Is is wrong to want to hurt him the way he hurt me?
Is it wrong to want to take it all from him so he is left with nothing?
All the years, all my time, all my efforts.
All the pain, all the fears,
he took away, only to bring worse ones near.
My heart says i still love him.
My heart won’t let me hurt him.
But my mind, it’s going crazy.
How can I hurt him anyway?
I’m so confused and angry.
But not at him.
I’m angry at me.
I let this all happen.
I can’t hurt him..
And my heart, […]
Feeling so guilty over the fact that I’m going to disappoint my parents(have to break some bad news) yet again! it’s killing me inside and now is making me think to kill myself physically too! I was doing about okay when this piece of news dropped on me.. its my life story..when things are about to go okay there will be something to kill off any progress..
hate my life and truly want to see the end.. life is not worth living
Hi there, fellow SP’ers!
We all woke up today, started a new day, and have been breathing up to this very moment, that you’re (hopefully) reading this. Keep it that way. I’ll try to.
I’m new here, had thought of joining the blog for some time now, after reading post after post and seeing how everyone supports and helps each other on here, and today I finally joined. So, you there reading this, just accept my gratitude for you being a part of this, because every person that has felt the way I do knows how to appreciate how big this is.
I’ll try to keep writing regularly. […]
maybe it does matter
that im broken
and sometimes very lonely
maybe it does matter
that i want to die
and sometimes i think i deserve to
maybe it does matter
that when i say im fine that its a lie
and in reality im so far from fine
maybe it does matter
that some people care about me
and others just hate me
maybe it does matter
that i should live
and not die
maybe it does matter…
but who knows?
maybe it doesn’t.
maybe it doesn’t matter that im broken
that im alone
that i want to die
that im not fine
that people care about me
that […]
Okay well first of all Hi my name is Karalyn and this is my first post so yea, hi!
I am 12 years old [pretty young for this website I know..] Anyways,
I was at the mall with my older sister one time, and I wanted to go to Hot Topic, But every time I ask.. My sister would say “You’re a freak for walking in there and wearing their clothes” I don’t know if she notices but it hurts me and that’s one of the reasons I cry to school. I feel that everyone just thinks that I’m a freak who wears all black and band […]
I’m at this pout in my life where I’m not sure who I am or even how I feel and why I feel that way. I don’t even know if I’m a good person or a bad person. I’m not sure if I’m still depressed I think I am but I’m going to try my hardest I guess. Goodnight u guys, god bless.