See these wrist, See these veins, See this blade, Now watch me bleed! You don’t know how hard it is for me not to cut my wrist again, I’m trying to survive this time, i need to live, but your making it hard for me not to do it. I’m tired of all your lies and bullshit! Your sweet to just get in a girls pants, well just go find your self some whores and you’ll be better off. bc i’m not gunna wait around for you to see that i would be better for you then a whore, but you would like to go […]
Veins
always my parents told me “ald these problems are made by our fault” is this normal? because i’m 15 years old and i have other way to see the world and please i’m just 15!!! i cut my veins in the shower because i don’t know how to face the world… i don’t think that it’s just my fault i just play truant one time and the huge trust go to the toilette in a second…
Well people it’s a cliché that we born to die, but is true we have good or bad moments but always the end is dead, so what is the problem with smoke? What is the problem with uncontroled sex? What is the problem? We will die finally.
We spend all our life trying to find a way to live more years or to be healthy… Life is more than that and maybe thats why we are here in this site screaming and begging to someone’s support and a shoulder to cry, we are a symbol of selfharm because we choose it unconsient.
I know how […]
(Sorry 4 my english i’m chilean) Why is always my fault? The answer from my parents always is “all these problems are your fault” really? Because all the problems starts 3 months ago when i played truant and i admit i play with my parents trust but they took off everything, i can’t go out, i can’t use my 10 ear rings and they say that ALL my friends are bad people and influence… I was desperate i was always wrong and always in a fight with them.. And i cut my veins by the first time e 3 months ago. Now only 3 people […]
I’m still breathing, the blood is still rushing through my veins, my hands are still moving. From the outside, everything seems to be okay. I seem like a normal high school girl, with a bubbly personality, always smiling, always happy. If only they would take the time to look beneath that mask I put on everyday. If only they would go that extra step to notice that the countless scars on my arm are not from my rabbits, but from my Swiss knife. If only they would realize that their words kick me over the edge every time.
I could probably spend ages going through each […]
So I’ve struggled with depression for years now. I’d say since I was about 13-14. Middle school was when I first contemplated suicide & it was after my very first boyfriend broke up with me. We didn’t date very long & things never got past first base. I’ve always been an emotional person, letting things get to me that shouldn’t.
Well over the years I’ve had my fair share of boyfriends (back to back really), and I wear my heart on my sleeve. I’ve realized I may have developed some co-dependency issues from the lack of knowing how to be alone. And to this day, guys […]
My mind has a never ending cry for help. I suffer in silence and when I speak people think its just a phase. I hope they’re right, I hope I’m wrong. I always say there’s always a limit for everything, it’s come to the point where the most important people in my life have turned their back on me. It feels nasty, I have disgust in my heart and tears want to flow through my eyes, I want to scream through the walls, yet I keep myself from doing this, I don’t want people seeing my pain, my suffering. So I keep that anger, that […]
Sometimes it is like there is nothing inside of me. Â Like I can’t move an inch or budge my eyes. Â Like I can’t twitch my mouth into a smile or raise my voice from a whisper. Â There is nothing. Â I am nothing. Â And there is nothing to live for.
Other times, like right now, it is like I am screaming in pain. Â No one hears it because it is stuck tight in my veins. Â Never exuding to the surface to see the light of day. Â But I see it. Â And I feel it. Â And it hurts.
Hey, so i’m here sitting on my chair… barely moved all day, I smell, I’m hungry but i don’t want to eat. I don’t deserve that. Food. Life. I am sitting here imagining grabbing the blade from my room, or a knife. yes a knife would cut better. Cuttung my veins, letting my blood spurt around me. I know what i’d think then. “Finally, this is it” then a breathe of relief and nothingness. Such a heavy feeling, hard to move. Hard to think Of anything but that. The end.
Oh my lovely alcohol, oh how you do please me
Fill my heart with sadness, and electrifying glee.
A sweet yet bitter liquid, that seeps into my veins
You dull my mind, you free my spirit, and take away the chains.
Sloshing in your frigid flask, you ask and tease for more
With jest and greed I indulge thee, and pass out on the floor.
No memory of prior things, convulsing laughs and tears
Ups and downs, a roller-coaster, yearning for more beer.
Dancing jigs to country music, strange and quite erratic
Thank god nobody’s watching, it must be quite traumatic.
Spread out on the cold concrete, bottle in one […]
well…i guess i can say it started when i was only a few years old….my parents were both drug addicts…i was in the bars with my mom and dad till my dad met my step mom when i was almost 4…for me it was normal….but then again so was buying my own food at the store, stealing money from my mom while she slept of the drugs and alcohol for the food, being used as collateral when she didnt have drug money, and being molested by her many boyfriends. then id go home to my dads, he and my mom worked alot…and did drugs so they werent always […]
The anger boils within my blood, run through, my veins and pumps through my heart. I have reached my max i will not take anymore am not five and i will not be treated as such . I have done everything i was asked to do, i am obedient and kind ,but yet they keep me trapped here like a dog in a cage. I dont go out and lime with friends because they dont wish it i only try to a good child but not anymore i have my own life and i will fight for my rights as long as there is breath […]
I’ve been taking antidepressants for years and they work for a while but then the black moods always come back. I switched my meds again but I just don’t feel right. I wish I had the money to see a psychotherapist on a weekly basis but I don’t. I just really need some one to talk to. If I thought that shooting heroin into my veins would help me I would try it. I feel so desperate and alone. I love my daughter so much and I know that if I killed myself it would really mess up […]
So yeah yesterday the 21th was my brothers birthday. He turned 6 this year. He was really happy, we had pizza, hotdogs, and a soccer cake. It was going really well… until dad came home from work. Like always he was drunk. So when it was time to eat the cake my dad started crying. Do you know how hard that was for ME, seeing my only father cry. I started crying as well… I was scared! My grandpa told him to calm down and eat. But then my dad got up went to the kitchen and grabes a knife. He then […]
The idea of killing myself is becoming more and more frequent, the plans, the ideas, the notes.. I have written so many of them.
If only she could see that I am suffering without her.. That I am lost, hopeless.. alone. Life seems so meaningless, so insignificant. My mind has sunk deep into an abyss of sadness and sorrow. I don’t know how much more I can take.
She was my world. Yet she left me.. Left me with no explanation. As time passed I worked it out. She left me for someone else. Someone I have know since I was a kid, initially I […]
Rusted veins..
Shallow pain..
So much shame..
Regret..
Feelings of loss
Feelings of change..
Am i to blame..
My thoughts and desires..
Burn in this fire..
Never again will i love..
Your face..
Your embrace..
My heart stops..
Bloods gone..
My hands are red..
Is she dead?
No..
Not her..
Shes… not here..
I am weak..
My life is bleak.
Tonight she died..
Not in reality..
In her head.
She died in mine
Hi My name is Nikki… I am 15 years old and I have been cutting for a very long time.. I know what it is like to hurt and feel nothing but pain and misery. I have lost so many people to death and You know it is not fun.. I am not that skinny pretty girl at all. I lost a guy I was in love with to a person who felt the need to shoot and kill him. I felt the pain of loosing my best friend to a person who hit him with a car. I felt the pain to my grandmother […]
they say knowledge is power
I say it’s a curse
To not know the truth is my desire
For ignorance is heaven on earth
To not know how cruel this world can be
To not know what is going to happen to me
Because my destiny is known by none but fate
They know the event but not the date
On which I’ll die, without a tear in my eye
Because I will have prayed for it all to end
To not know how far gone humanity has become
To not know how much love has stung my heart
And torn apart
My life from my soul
Anger rising, rushing through my veins
Thoughts racing, running through my brain.
I can’t take this, all this hate.
I don’t want failure to be my fate.
I am unable to give a f*ck anymore,
So please go walk out that f*cking door!
He and she is no longer we
And I don’t want it to be!
Just let me go, say goodbye.
Let me go and watch me fly.
Hopefully I’ll soar up to God,
Or maybe just get beaten by a metal rod.
F*ck this life, I give up.
No more strife, put my ashes in a cup.
Spread them in a forest in the fall
Or maybe dress me […]
You see the heart symbolizes so much in both our society and various veins of creative writing. The human heart symbolizes; life, love, emotional anguish, and even endurance (e.g. the durability of the human heart is notoriously difficult to burn/destroy completely).
So an individual that has gone through a lot of emotional and or romantic pain would naturally choose to injure their chest/heart area of the body in order to send a message to the people they left behind, perhaps only one person in particular. […]