so unsure..

so my name is courtney im 16.  i dont really no where to start. i live with my dad and stepmom, yet i always hadnt.  my mom hade at a youn age she had 4 kids. growing up she was more worried about drigs and partying so i was left there to raise the other children while i was mearly a child. my mother went from man to man, we never stayed abywee long. so i deacided to move in with my dad. lottle did i realize that this would be such a bad choice. when my dad gets mad at me he grrabs me up like a man and will “pinish” me for it. my dad us the cause of me having panic attacks and they are only getting  worse. then a couple weeks ago my stepmoms little brother who is about 15 spent the weekend with us. i woke up to him sexually assaltting me. i dont no wat to do. i constantly have panic attacks, my body constantly shakes, im depressed,i cut, i do drugs to try and not think about anything. when at home i sit in constant silance. when i see my dad i often have panic attacks. i could care less of i die. people may be better off without me. i feel emotionally drained. i often dont even feel like eating. i often cone home and go straight to sleep to avoid confrintation. i cry for no reason. im a waist of a life, perhaps i should do everyone a favor. what should i do