I hate it .. so much

Only human…bipolar robs you of your humanity, strips you of all pride and joy. It drives a wedge between you, friends and even family. It destroys your world and forces it’s own onto you…

Lucky are those who find long lasting relief, but don’t get me wrong, there is allways hope. There will be days that feels darker than night and there will be nights that feel like it’s day because your mind is wide awake but those happy few hours that you can dream the most amazing of dreams and think up the most elaborate of schemes can be, at times, pure delight.

Most conditions brings good and bad…you have to find the good and use it against what makes you sad. That doesn’t mean I have found the answer…doesn’t mean I am not suffering…but I maintain and try to stay on a even keel. Read my recent post as an example. I am in a slump, but haven’t given up because around the corner things will seem better again…true they will allways turn sour again but follow the path back to the sunshine. Everything has a cycle…up and down…dark and light…night and day.

I hate the saying of “There are people worse off than you…” There is no such thing, we carry only as much as we are able to. If the people “worse off than you” could not take it, they wouldn’t have been given that cross to bear. You are the one who needs to be in your thoughts and prayers. Selfish as it might seem, reality is a complex thing and so is the mind… We can not soften our reality by trying to think our selves into that of another. Reality is as harsh wether you have misplaced your cellphone when expecting an important phone-call or lying in a cold hospital bed waiting for a life saving operation.

Hmm…I’m ranting…hope something I said meant something. Maybe I just needed someone to listen as much as you did…sorry if I went around the bend, can’t tell right now