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About 5 months ago , I had a horrible night . My moms drunk boyfriend was fucking her in the living room and made me sit next to them and kept yelling “Your next little one!” ( it keeps replaying in my head still this day ) and I sat there crying. Obviously he wanted to have sexual intercourse with me. When he went to bathroom to use it , I ran out of the house. I hide in the dark underneath cars hiding from my moms boyfriend ( lets call him H ) , he was yelling my name like a concerned father. I hide there as quite as can be and when I didn’t hear him I ran. I did not know anyone in this neighborhood. I was running to no where. I was scared. I went on to a main street and ran towards these abandoned apartments and sat on the cement cry for a hour or two. I didn’t know where I was . I always have a razor with me , I had it in my bra i took it out and found a bag to lay my arm on . I sat there cutting my arm up. I heard a car drive into the parking lot. It was H I pulled up my my sleeve and started to run . My arm was burning and it was dripping with blood. I ran and ran. Until I came to this park. It was barley around 3 am I was cold and scared
I lied down on the grass. I fell asleep and I just remember waking up to a little girl screaming and I guess it was her sister dialing 9-1-1 and I stood up. My arm was numb and I was nervous. I heard a ambulance and police sirens . In a matter of minutes they pulled up. They took me to the hospital. My mom came and picked me up shortly after they asked me questions and cleaned up my arm. Once I got home my mom started to slap me and yell at me. I remember her exact words “Your are the worst daughter in the world you should’ve just cut deep enough so I wouldn’t have to live with you anymore you little ****!” I sat in my room crying , and finally I had the guts to get up and go to the garage. I grabbed a extension cord and a chair. I quietly took them to my room. I had a walk in closet so I tied the rope on to wear I would put my hangers I texted my bestfruend good bye and I jumped off the chair and kicked it away. I felt helpless and then my sister came running and got me down about two minutes later . She called 9-1-1 and again I was at the hospital. I felt as if I should’ve gone through with it and did it when everyone was asleep. I cried and cried to the doctors to not let me go back home with them. Child protection services came and I was pit in a foster home. Not the best but better than my last. I still do cut to this day. But I have been getting better everyday . Now you know my story.