Home Stories of Hope Enough
Report Post


by bchrisst

Why is it so hard to be happy with your life?

People always say you should be happy and blessed that you’re even alive. Really?

I find my life to be so stressful and horrible. I find it so hard to be happy. I always worry about my future. Then I consider suicide and it makes me feel better. Like I don’t have to deal with anything or anyone anymore. I would go into my life details, but there’s no point really.

I guess I can say the only reason I want to live is for other people, but is that how it should be?

How can I make myself happy even with the thought of suicide in my head? Seems so impossible. Sometimes I just want to end it all. Fuck it all.

19, m, FL


Related posts


The Mad Hatter 10/13/2014 - 7:58 pm

As far as I see it, there is no ‘how it should be’, there’s just how it is for each person. I’m living for other people – my boyfriend, my friends and family are the only reason I’m still here, and that’s not to say I haven’t tried to end it before.
As for living with suicidal thoughts, finding a good councillor can help a lot, its helped me. Finding a good councillor can be a ***** and working things out with them is slow and tough but dont give up.
All the best dude.

sere 10/16/2014 - 3:30 am

i relate to how you feel for sure. how oddly comforting researching suicide methods can feel. i am really ptsd triggered today due to unexpected money crisis and have spent the evening finding ways to be dead. i wish the way i want to die was more effective….ah well.

anyway i too have hesitations about what the impact might be on people i know, although i can’t say i feel close enough to anyone for me to feel it would be a huge deal, i still would rather it not be a thing to them….been wondering if i stopped taking my thyroid meds would my heart stop or would i become hypothermic…

but really i dont; want to be dead just feel not so terrible. hell i can live without being happy, just not trapped in hell please. just not so overwhelmingly tired and poor and sick and ptsd triggered.

i hope you found a way to feel less terrible.

Leave a Comment