My “friends” have been cut from my life because they always believed it was fair that they could get mad at each other, but I couldn’t get mad at either of them without severe punishment. My family is starting to act the same way. My sister will confront me and threaten me if I get mad at my mother or grandmother, and my mother will do the same if I get mad at my sisters. It’s not reciprocated though. If someone gets mad at me, nobody fucking cares. These people who are supposed to love me and care about me don’t listen when I try to explain this to them. They’ll tell me to just “get over it”, but I can’t live constantly battling people literally every single day of my life. I’ve cut a multitude of people out of my life already for things like this. I often wonder what makes people treat me this way and how come I can’t seem to express it enough to people that I have to kill myself if they don’t treat me differently. I’m in so much pain and I already have many, MANY battles to deal with. Today I’m hurting so bad physically. I have medical conditions and I don’t need this stress every day. I’ve dealt with it for at least 15 years now. I’m 25. I cannot do this anymore. I can’t mend my life and society seems to think of me as a child. I have tried to change myself for them. I’ve tried to just not get mad at people, but I can’t live with everyone taking advantage of me either. I have said this often on here, that I have to kill myself. January 5th, I will. Before my birthday, and after Christmas. I will kill myself then.
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2 comments
Believe me, I can relate to feeling as if you are constantly battling others. Family strife can be Hell and unfortunately, many people seem to believe that they are entitled to treat others however they wish while expecting care and understanding in return. It’s unfair and quite honestly, if you feel that cutting such people out of your life was the right thing to do, it may very well have been.
With that said, loneliness aside, you do have the power to make the decision not to allow others to take advantage of you so much. It’s not easy (I know that firsthand), but it can be done and perhaps you will then see an improvement in your life by adding these elements of self-confidence and self-respect.
L4Y
(L4Y@cogeco.ca)
Hey, I also know the feeling. Seriously. I currently live with my Grandmother who treats me like a child and wishes to control me all she can. I cannot drive or live anywhere else and society also thinks I am a child. Funny thing though, I am 26 years old. I am disabled by various dibilitating Mental Illnesses and I too have a problem with people taking advantage of me. I am a people pleaser by nature which doesn’t help and perhaps one day I will learn to take a stand. Just here to say I understand totally where you are coming from with this and I wish I could help you. But then, if that was true I could also help myself. I did want to say my thoughts are with you though and to hang in there as this isn’t easy. I know first hand. But there has got to be a way out. And whatever that is for you I wish you peace and a freedom from your pain!!!!