The Early Intervention team called my therapist to say they’re not bothering with me again. She said they told her I’m not psychotic. I could’ve told her that.
If it were psychosis then this wouldn’t be real. The voices wouldn’t be real, the Angels wouldn’t be real, the others wouldn’t be real, the demons and shadow people wouldn’t be real. But they are real.
They said it might just be down to my depression and anxiety. Okay. They can say that, but it’s not. They’re just real, and that’s not down to anything.
I see my therapist next Friday now, so I’ll tell her it was a waste of time and I wouldn’t have saw them if they were trying to figure out if it were psychosis or anything similar. I’m not psychotic. They’ve just said I’m not. It’s all real.
I told them it was all real. I told them the Angels are real and the others are trying to hurt me. I told them the demons try to get me. I told them about the shadow people following me. They have to believe me now. They have to try and help me now. I need them to help me. It’s bad enough trying to stay away from the Others in my college, and now I’m being dragged about outside. They’re all real, and no one believed me. They have to believe me now.
I need to see my doctor still, it hasn’t been safe around there recently. But I’ll see him next week. I need to. I need him to help me stay safe. I need him to tell me what to do. He’s supposed to help me when I see him, so I need to see him soon.
4 comments
Did the invention team tell you they were real?? Maybe you need to talk to different mental health specialists, and BE HONEST with them about what you see and hear. If you lie convincingly enough, or say it’s not a big deal, of course they’ll tell you that you’re fine, but if you really go into detail on everything, they might change their tune.
When was it that you first started seeing these creatures?
I told them it’s all real. They asked if I believe it was real, and of course I said I do. I was as honest I can be right now – I can’t say certain things. I told them it interferes with college and such, but they’ve still said I’m fine. So I’m okay.
The people I saw specialise in psychosis – so obviously I didn’t need to see them. I know I’m fine. I already knew I wasn’t psychotic.
I can’t remember exactly when it all started, but I think it’s been about 3 1/2 years. Though the Angels and stuff are more recent – since October/November last year. These specific voices have been persisting for almost a year, though.
Do you think there some kind of event that triggered these appearances/voices?
So did they mean that you’re not in danger of harming anyone else? Yet, if you believe you might harm yourself, or that others may harm you… I mean, that can’t be fun. It might be a good idea to ask a psychiatrist about that.
If you had the choice today to no longer hear these voices, etc., and have nothing to do with any of what you described, would you take it? Would you be able to go on and try to forget about everything the voices said, and live a normal life?
I used to have many delusions about the universe choosing me for some grand secret and that i was the reincarnation of a wolf, etc.. Many years later I realize they were just lies my mind created to protect itself.
It’s very strange now living as a somewhat normal human and knowing how deeply lost in my web of lies I was.