The effects of suicide on family and friends.
Back in High School, there was this girl that i like, like A LOT or should i say I LOVE HER. She’s pretty good looking, athletic and the coolest girl that i know but she was out of my league, that’s the problem. I’m this skinny not good looking guy. Like I’m the complete definition of a NERD. But i didn’t care. I had to gather all this guts to prove to her that I can be the GUY for her. I want her to like me. I heard she had a boyfriend and then they broke up. I know it was a good opportunity for me but i don’t want to be that guy, you know what i mean. So i waited for months. Time come and i talked to her and told her what i felt. She told me that she ‘s not ready to have a boyfriend. So i told her that i can wait and i did my best for her to like me. What i did was I save some money even i have a lot of projects and school expenses but i didn’t give a fuck. I bought her chocolates, flowers, and shirts during valentines day and Christmas. I even come to her house to give her presents like cakes and stuff. I thought i’m doing good but i was wrong. I failed. I felt dead at that time. Like my life and world shattered.
Time passed, i get to realize that you cannot make someone love you. LOVE is not about giving or buying someone stuffs. Love is about telling someone you love her and if she doesn’t feel the same way, accept it. I get to the point where i realized that love cannot be rushed or forced. Love is about having someone who feels the same way like you do. I realized that i’d rather be alone for the right reasons than be with someone for the wrong ones. I really love her. I LOVE HER STILL but her happiness is what matters most to me. After that, we went to college and i never felt the same feeling like what i have for her. She has a boyfriend now and i heard they’re doing good. I don’t hate her for that. I guess i couldn’t, ever. And i don’t lose hope that there’s someone out there for me, who will love me back as i much as i love that person.