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For general topics related to the site.

0

see the candles

  January 12th, 2010 by Brokenshadows

For the most part of my life i was bullied and shut away from being allowed to express myself. From year 5 to year 10 i received constant emotional and sometimes physical torments from the people i believed to be friends, i stuck with them because they were the only people i knew. By the this point i had become very shy around anyone else but these people. Iwas so confused at why they were doing this that i believed them to be right. I began to act along to their games because it seemed to make them laugh. 

In this way, i don’t think i ever …

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2

So tired

  January 12th, 2010 by chaos

I just want to die, for years I’ve been thinking of suicide no one knows everyone sees me as care free and happy, my parents love me but i let them down I have a GF who loves me I’m not sure if shes it though I’ve messed up bad in school everytime I try it gets worse, I’m grade 12 but still doing grade 10 classes because I skip way to many days due to depression I say its because I’m sick, really all I want to do is die I’ve thought about ways to do it, easy quick ways but a part of …

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1

Making my reservation to ctb.

  January 12th, 2010 by readytoctb

I had originally planned to go the day before my birthday which is in a couple of weeks. However a certain event a week ago made me think that maybe I should wait and see if she would come back. I don’t think I can though, even if she would eventually return there is no way I can hold out the amount of time that it would take. Everyday is to hard, everyday is to painful, everyday I spiral further down into the abyss. So I feel today that I am back on the clock and there seems to be a sense of calm with …

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1

Taking my last breath.

  January 12th, 2010 by takemefaraway

I LOVED YOU…

YOU HURT ME!

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4

I want to die so bad.

  January 11th, 2010 by quicktomato

i hate life. it sucks so freakin bad. why do i need to live? i have nothing to live for. back to cutting again. it sucks. i wanna go to sleep and not wake up. never see the daylight again. my friends wouldnt care neither would my family. i hate my family my friends are pretty mean. i wanna get ran over by a train and have all my friends and family watch and see… watch how much pain they put me through. no one knows how im feeling but me. and i want to kill those fuckers who messed with me and stabbed me …

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5

this what i want…..

  January 11th, 2010 by abbygone

i am lost….i dont know where to go, there are a thousands paths, a thousand hands, a thousand words, a millions souls, Mirrors and mirrors they only show me what i am….what if i dont want to hear it? what if i want to hear lies? to hear that they are worried? that they want to help me, that they want to listen…….but they dont, they accuse, they point, they point to all does marks, mistakes, errors, sorrow, pain…..how can they help me like that? i dont want to hear that they are sorry….why hear apologies? they are not the ones to blame! I dont …

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6

its the worst feeling in the world

  January 11th, 2010 by wishicould

its bad when you go to sleep thinking “maybe i wont wake up tomorrow” its worse when you wake up and think “fuck, im still alive.”

life sucks and id like to convineiently die in my sleep. it would be lovely.

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2

I want to kill her and die

  January 11th, 2010 by punjabigujju

Yes….I feel what fun it would be to kill her and die….

Infact…i know her from 2006 and had really loved her…
It was love at first sight…We felt as if we knew each other from a past life…
A very very very strong telepathy was there between us…a very strange connection between the two of us.
I Never was able to meet her…and she got pissed off in 2007…yet kept loving me and I loving her…

In 2008 she admitted that she was getting these constant nightmares….
and thats when we figured out that I had killed her in the past life…

We continued our Journey to 2009, She left the …

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8

im about to

  January 11th, 2010 by wishicould

im about to kill myself. i dont wanna leave my dad with a bloody traumatic mess. can someone please tell me a good drug to overdose on? i just want him to find me in a non gorey way.

DO NOT LECTURE ME ABOUT GOD. GOD IS A LIE AND HE IS DEAD TO ME. DO NOT LECTURE ME ABOUT “LIVING A HAPPY LIFE” AND “GETTING BETTER” BECAUSE IT ISNT GOING TO HAPPEN. I WANT PEOPLE WHO SUPPORT MY DECISION TO DIE. THANK YOU!

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0

Gone and Forgotten

  January 11th, 2010 by PaintedCoon

Somewhere along the way I lost that thing that I said I would never lose. It disappeared from sight and mind never to return, without my even knowing, but beyond that, I forgot too what it was, a greater sin I think, than loosing it. They knew that it would disappear but I doubted and forgot and their prophecy came to realization. But for what I lost, I gained nothing, nothing to fill the void left by that hazy untouchable thing. It left me cold and alone grasping in the endless dark that became a part of me, for something, nothing, anything to not feel …

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0

honestly.

  January 11th, 2010 by silent

I really do like this thing. It feels like some sort of weight has been lifted. No one knowing who i am, not knowing anything about me. It doesn’t give you any reason to judge me, other than what i am typing. But if you judge me for that, you’re placing yourself in the same category. It seems, when you’re like this, that everything good comes crashing down around you. The only people you’ve ever loved, get taken away from you. You end up being un-masked, seen for who you really are. Too many people are afraid to see something different, different emotions that they’ve …

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1

2 Seconds.

  January 11th, 2010 by brad90210

My death is going to be fast. I’m 25 now and I know that I’m not gonna live past 45.

gonna take a gun…go sailing, and blow my brains out.

i am so fucking lonely.

i hate life more than anything.

lately i’ve been thinkin that maybe i should do it sooner rather than later. why stick around? i don’t wanna hurt my family, but honestly, they would get over it.

i hate the world. i hate people. i hate everyone i’ve ever met.

everyone is a fucking back stabber.

i’d like to kill a few people before i go – but that would take too much planning and too much energy.

yea, …

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0

I just want 2 die and go 2 hell

  January 11th, 2010 by Daniel21

well…this is my fourth post on here. and i am now feelin worse than i have in my entire life. i have started cuttin again, it is the begining of the 7 year of my depression, and my anti depressants were workin 4 a while….and now they arent doin shit. im just so fuckin tired of feelin this way. and most of my friends just tell me to cheer up and to snap out of it…and they just dont understand that “snappin outta it” isnt possible. if i could snap outta it i would. i dont want 2 feel like shit all the time…i want …

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6

Used to it.

  January 11th, 2010 by silent

I just feel the need to vent. Yeah, i could just write it down but having people read it feels like i can kinda make my point. I’ve had this knack of hiding what i truly feel for years. Since i was 3 years old, when i first saw someone hang themselves, I’ve thought about dying. Everyone i meet, assumes that i have a fantastic family life, Mum and Dad, all my siblings. Sooo far from the truth. People often say “you’re so lucky, i wish i was you, you’re stunning” What you look like, has nothing to do with how you feel, and trust …

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2

Blahh

  January 10th, 2010 by whiteylover

I’m not all that sure what I’m going to write, I just know that I NEED to write. Blahh I’m not all that sure what’s going on with me but I know I want to die and I know I need to die. Death is all that will cure me of the things going on in my life. I need to die, and if your planning on giving me a bunch of, “You have so much potential and there is so much in your future,” crap stop reading now. I don’t want your pity I just want to write.  I’ve been having constant suicidal thoughts

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1

My Story

  January 10th, 2010 by 7timesurvivor

between being really Really frustrated about starting school, having some self esteem issues, and my parents screaming at me and eachother i had lost it. I tried to overdose on tylonol extra strength. I was in the hospital for two weeks it was torture not to mention the horrible mental hospital they sent me to. Well i lived and i am glad i did. If anyone reading tis is suicidal dont do it its so dumb and you will regret it later!!!!

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0

Saved by the bell?maybe, not sure – part4

  January 10th, 2010 by readytoctb

We met for dinner tonight, first time it was just me and her in over a month. I begged, prayed, hoped and feared all week leading up tonight that something would be revealed, good or bad, positive or negative, something from which I could either hang my hopes on or give them up completely. Nothing however was what I got, no hopes that she was coming back and nothing saying she was planning on leaving completely. So again tonight I will go to bed knowing that tomorrow and the next day and the one after that …I will be all alone.  I am so tired …

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2

THE WORST FEELINGS

  January 10th, 2010 by emoscars

  She wakes up in the the morning asking, why her, why not anyone else.She knows there are some people in the world with the same feelings, still she feels alone.Like everyone in the world thinks they know that one girl more than she knows herself,well she thinks of if she knows they’re wrong.

In her mind she wants to be alone crying on the inside hoping for someone to save her,hoping for a better life,and hoping that she can have someone to talk to just like her.Wanting to run from everything just cant get away running through darkness,crying at night feeling

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5

America is dead and I want to be too

  January 10th, 2010 by Nopoint1968

I am 41 years old and no longer want to live. I’m in America and have watched my country change and move in a direction I no longer feel is safe for artists, thinkers, creative people or intellectuals. In fact it reminds me of Germany. Nazi Germany.

Here are the things you might think are normal if you are under age 40.

News on TV around the clock 24 hours a day every day

News reporters telling you on television a celebrity should accept Jesus Christ as their savior

“Free Speech Zones”

Being herded and made to wait for security to check you and your …

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3

i am sick

  January 10th, 2010 by bruisedandbroken16

i, i am very sick. i lay in my bed and cry myself to sleep every night, i stare at the blank walls that surround me and wonder if i’m ever gonna be somebody, i look at my wrists and ask myself what have i done??, i look in the mirror and tremble, i dont eat and whenever i do eat i puke it up afterwards, i want to end my life but dont have the balls to do it, im bruised and i am broken inside, i have a gaping hole in my heart that constantly screams and reminds me of its presence, …

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