General

Something weirds been happening ive changed this year ALOT in 5th grade i went through my depression stage then came 6th grade and i became all happy and stuff but now its 7th grade and im starting to remember i mean i guess ive always remembered i mean ive pratically tortured myself  with the memories even though it happened like 4 yrs ago i guess cant really remember but this year its really hitting me with a BANG!!! so with the memories and my parents fighting things arent looking so good for me but im trying to hang on and all you other people here should […]

This real world is just bland, dull, dry, and boring,
not to mention the successful criteria and type of people to succeed are often the bland, dull, and obnoxious type too.
This all just fucking depressing me all the times.

What a great coincidence this thread is,
as I was just re-watching again the movie “Inception”
Damn it..how I wish I could really live in a cool dream worlds like in the movie.
I wish I could just sleep forever

Fuck real world. It’s boring and full of boring humans.

The beginning of my brief childhood is very simple…Abandoned and thrown in to the so justifying adoption system.All i ever wanted was to fit in it seemed but that thought manifested into something much more gratifying.Observation.I spend most of my teenage days watching and recording others actions and responses.If dying were easy i’d already dead.Life is so confusing and not the least bit enjoyable.

I don’t know how did I end up writing this and I don’t know if I’m gonna be bullying because of this, everything seems to be out of control in my life and no one seems to understand it, at least not my friends or family they say “You’re  just crazy” “Grow up” or for some reason everyone has a Phd in psychology and try to “help”… sometimes you just need to be listened instead of listen how great life is and how stupid suicide can be, they call me coward they think I’m just overreacting. I don’t want them to feel my pain, I […]

“Oh, feel better WINK WINK. I’m probably one of those obnoxious preppy whores you see every day at school, yeah, the one with the low cut shirt and horribly annoying voice that taunts you even when I’m not around!”

Fuck. Off.

And you too Mr. “This site isn’t like it used to be!” NO DUH. NOTHING is like it used to be. Get the fuck off  if you don’t like the fact that sometimes, you can’t just focus on the suicidal kids/people. For once in my life I actually feel at ease. The stuff I tell you here is stuff that only you know- A secret.

If my […]

Hi, my name is Xavier. I am a 14 year old boy. I suffer from depression, suicidal thoughts, and social anxiety disorder. If your wondering why I bothered to include my social anxiety disorder,  it’s because of school. As some of you may be aware, social anxiety disorder is when you get freaked out about being near other people. Some people have normal social anxiety which is just getting a little nervous when they are near new people. Some people get it mild when they take longer to get to know people before getting comfortable around them. Some people ( like me ) have severe […]

Dose anybody know if theirs a mental disorter where your mind is running at 100 miles per hour?

When I’m alone my thoughts seem to speed up.I don’t hear “voices” but I’m ussuly cought up in “Fame” if I ever became famious or on certion people in my life.For example,Comic book writeing,how my mother’s job working out for her,Playing the guitar,(or at least a poor exicuse of doing so),work,upcoming jury duity,w2 forms,back to work.I don’t want to be self-centered of anything becouse my psyc said their wasen’t anythink wrong with me but I wanna be sure.I can understad if no body wants to talk.

I really cant go on anymore !
 

child of mine, when i die
let then, be me, the infant
when i die, as the light ,
from my eyes cease to shine
let then, be me, the child.
pick me in your arms
and take me into your home.
Undress all anguish from my being
lay me in your bed
but don`t leave me alone,
and if I wake up,
child of mine,
please; sing me a song
and give me some of your dreams
so i can fall asleep at your tone
until another morning has dawn
and by then i will be gone.
 

i want to live in a fantasy world. not like w/ mythical creatures. i want to basically live in a movie, because i will know what’s going to happen in the end.

i’ve been living in reality for way too long. i don’t belong here. i belong in dream land.

I hate myself… god I hate myself.  It still is not okay

I know a lot of people go through suicidal phases. I know a lot of people spend most of their lives fighting varying levels of depression. I also know that many people erroneously believe that nobody cares about them/everybody hates them/there is no point in trying anymore. I have come to the conclusion that I may very well be one of the rare cases where these conclusions are actually correct.

I have a long history of depression, like many people here. I even have a few suicide attempts under my belt ( admittedly half-assed and primarily for attention, though I didn’t realize it at the time […]

ssup guys ! why all the gloom and sorrow ey ? put it this way. just live your life as it is. if you die along the process, then you die. if you don’t, then you don’t.

i know i know. easier said than done. blach –

depression got me all impervious to life much i guess. but ey, the world isn’t TOTALLY boring. why whine about dying and such. embrace it you self loathing suicide junkies. like say, i have narrowed so far the best way i’d feel like going about it is by jumping of a plane naked (or like, take off the parachute suit […]

I need some information on how to make the device that connects to the helium tank and the tube which apparently  isn’t the device that comes with the one from the store. how to i make that device that will allow me to connect the tube to the helium canister and for air to come out ?

February 1 2011

I can’t keep on being this way; it’s hurting my mother, and family, and even myself. But I can’t stop, I can’t control this feeling, when it comes it takes over me, and when it lives, it lives me confused, with no explanation to give. I don’t know what to do anymore, I want it to stop! I tried leaving it in my life, but it don’t fit, is too powerful and my body is still weak from all those other fights. Please help me, I need this to stop. Every time I see my mom I feel like crying, because I can’t […]

People keep asking questions i dont want to answer…

They keep saying i will find the answer.

But when, when will i ever find

the answer in my mind

they tell me im beautiful and i have an amazing life ahead of me

well screw them i have nothing to look foward too

because the one for me has left me life

and he will never come back

i tell him i love him and he says it back

i just want to know what he says behind my back.

I love him with all my heart and everything more

but im not willing to stay here if he is not mine

my heart is black

my world […]

i wish everyone around me realized i wasn’t happy. they all think i’m acting out or being dramatic, but they’ll realize how wrong they were once i’m gone. i’m seriously depressed. i have no real friends, my boyfriend isn’t there like he should be, my mom ignores me, and i never see my dad or sister. so i’m always alone. no one realizes the seriousness of this. I’M DEPRESSED AND SUICIDAL! and they cant see it. no one wants to care. i don’t know what to do. i’m worthless. i have nothing to be proud of, everyone thinks i’m a joke, theres no positive perks […]

Hi, I’m back. Not sure why, why not just go ahead and leave.  IDK… maybe because I don’t WANT to die, I just don’t want to live.

I can’t help but to think that life would be better without me in it, it kills me to see everyone so happy and me having to put on a fake smile so no one asks questions.Iv just started grade10 2011,and I’m doing my best at school that I can.But how can I continue doing my best when my best is never good enough. Not only in school but everything I do feels so unappreciated. My heart breaks everyday. I’m not taken seriously iv tried to speak to my friends and no one understands so I just tell then nevermind. I cry myself to sleep […]