Category:

Rants

What’s on my mind

by TheImmortalYoshi 1/13/2014

written by TheImmortalYoshi

Facebook status update box:
“What’s on your mind?”

What’s on my mind? Well here I’ll tell ya..I have so many things on my mind it hurts, it makes me stressed. Plus stress and depression don’t mix. I have been trying not to cry all day so instead I ripped open my skin where it was healing from me cutting myself last week because the main person I talk to to cheer me up was either, busy, playing games, sleeping or his internet was acting up. So I broke almost a year of not cutting because of all this shit. Plus! I have had panic attacks worse […]

1/13/2014 2 comments

the naivety of childhood

by derityllaermai 1/13/2014

written by derityllaermai

When I was a child, I used to think that life was just a temporary nightmare. So every night I thought my last day was over and that I would not wake up next morning. How fool I was: it turns out you have to make yourself to sleep forever.

1/13/2014 1 comment

“Everything ends”

by Malifax 1/13/2014

written by Malifax

My eleven year relationship ended 15 months ago and in an effort to find new people to connect with, I joined a social networking site. Â I made friends and had a pretty decent support network for well over a year, but in December I deleted my profile from Google Plus. Â I had been seeing more and more of my friends posting about their happy relationships and the wonderful parts of their lives… and I was starting to hate them for it. Â Watching others enjoy their lives while mine was so miserable seemed to be self-torture. Â My posts were steadily getting darker and darker and fewer […]

1/13/2014 10 comments

Someone who was MORE shit out of luck

by HealingInHisWings 1/13/2014

written by HealingInHisWings

You know what makes me feel better sometimes when I’m feeling down?

Reading a true story about someone who is up shit creek farther than me. Â At least I have a paddle.

Adrift is a great true story about Mr Callahan, who was trapped on a rubber ducky life raft in the ocean for 76 days. Â Here is a link to the eBook download (mods, I believe the author made the book public domain at one time)

Callahan_Steven-Adrift.epub:

http://easyfilesharing.info/file/1550/callahan-steven-adrift.epub

Here is a link to the authors website. Â He worked on the […]

1/13/2014 3 comments

I can’t do this anymore.

by crimsonangel 1/12/2014

written by crimsonangel

I just can’t do this anymore and no one in my life understands. Â They don’t understand that I don’t want to live. I see no purpose in life. You go through so many hard things to just die in the end. Â I hate living and telling me things like “At least you have it better than people in Africa” doesn’t help. It makes it worse. If I could, I would give them my life, if that would mean I wouldn’t have to live it anymore. People keep telling me that God put me here for a reason, but I don’t believe that we go to […]

1/12/2014 2 comments

Tired

by LNR 1/12/2014

written by LNR

I’m not expecting much from posting this. I’ve posted things on online forums before and never had a response from anybody. I think I’m just hoping that if I get some of this out I’ll feel a little relief. I don’t even know where to start. I don’t have a problem relating to other people’s stories but I have yet to find anybody that feels they can relate to me. My whole life I have felt out of sync, like I don’t belong in this world. Sometimes I honestly believe I wasn’t supposed to exist, and that’s why everything always goes wrong in my life, […]

1/12/2014 5 comments

It’s Time

by toxicluminoth 1/12/2014

written by toxicluminoth

Everything is wrapped up. Letters are sealed. Things are organized. The method tested. My ocd is almost satisfied.

I was hoping that tonight will be the night but I’m thinking tomorrow night works better. I’ve been tooling around on this site a bit and I feel like I have more left to offer. “Leave things better than what you found them and don’t step on anyone’s toes if you can help it.”-Me.

That and I’ve got a big mess to take care of to save others the trouble (I’ve got two ferts that deserve a fresh setup).

A few people here have hit the nail on the head […]

1/12/2014 20 comments

by broken.soul 1/12/2014

written by broken.soul

I feel so alone. Everyday I go through the motions. I have no purpose in life. No meaning. Â Â I just want to be with my wife but she is so far away. She isn’t like me. She’s not alone. She’s happy. Much stronger than I am. I treat her like a queen. I do all that I can but it isn’t enough. I just want her attention. Her love. Why did I choose this life? I am so lost and alone. My wife is deploying so I will be even more distant from her. I don’t want to die but what else can I […]

1/12/2014 0 comment

What to do next?

by Kinnaree 1/12/2014

written by Kinnaree

I’m a girl of 21 who’s not interested in life anymore. I’ve tried so SO much to fit to society but couldn’t. I’m becoming messed up and put on the most fake front in order for people to believe I’m fine. I’m not.

I can’t say I’ve been through the worse, but no matter who you are, you always end up having problems, big or not. Well, I’ve always had a good family background, except on my mother’s side (my maternal grandparents) that didn’t like my father for religious reasons. Until the age of 10 or so, I had never met them. And when I did, […]

1/12/2014 4 comments

I Don’t Ask For Much

by Anisotropic 1/12/2014

written by Anisotropic

I really don’t ask for a lot out of life.Â I mean I’ve wished for a lot of things, sure, and who hasn’t? I know that I don’t need a lot of luxuries in life.Â Â But is it really too much to ask for a little stability in my life?Â All I want to be able to do is go to sleep at night without being anxious about where I’ll end up sleeping and if I’ll eat tomorrow.Â It’s the reason I ended up suicidal in the first place.Â Not the self-esteem issues, not the loneliness, not any failed relationship, not school, not work.Â Hell, […]

1/12/2014 5 comments

In the depths of anorexia… I am now choosing to die by dehydration.

by disappearinggirl 1/12/2014

written by disappearinggirl

I feel as though I need to express my final words somewhere. I clearly cannot reach out to loved ones about my decision, but I feel the need to write a final “goodbye” so to speak. I have been suffering from anorexia for 7 years. It has truly been a coping mechanism for the deep depression I feel and being unable to process my emotions in a healthy way. Without it, I cannot function. With it, I cannot function. There seems to be no winning for me. I have tried treatments and therapy and medicines, it doesn’t work. I am scheduled to be admitted to […]

1/12/2014 19 comments

I’m so confused

by lonelyyforever 1/11/2014

written by lonelyyforever

I feel like ending my life. I feel like I don’t deserve to live because I’m not a good person I’m always unhappy even when things are good. I’m 19 and I recently won a scholarship to go to
School & at first I was super happy but now Â I’m about to start in 2 days but I’m not excited anymore (btw it’s my first semester) but it’s like there was so many problems with getting the scholarship in my funds and I had so many issues understanding the the whole process of what was going on with my enrollment and all that stuff. Ugh […]

1/11/2014 6 comments

Second to Last Post

by kurdt kobian 1/11/2014

written by kurdt kobian

I can’t help but hurt people and isolate myself from them. There aren’t enough people who understand what I’m going through in my life. Just one really and she’s alienated from me too. I’m alienated from just about everyone emotionally at this point. I had a really positive and engaging relationship with someone but when my depression came out, she couldn’t understand and moved on. I tore into her because of it and that makes me feel guilty. And it hurt so fucking bad when it was done.

I know there’s a lot of people who have it worse than I do. Today I was […]

1/11/2014 4 comments

no more…

by bye_bye 1/10/2014

written by bye_bye

i come and go.

here and there.

i make mistakes.

i go home, and there it is.

the guilt, the pain, the shame.

i can’t please her.

make her happy.

everything i do, i just mess up.

and now we’re broken.

non existent.

we tried – i tried.

it just doesn’t work.

i can’t be who you want.

call me all the names you want.

tell me i’m crazy and stupid.

that i need to get myself together.

but it won’t change anything.

i don’t care if you say.

go head, kill yourself.

“i’m so depressed”.

you’re unworthy.

i don’t think you really love me.

cause it’s ok.

i’l be gone soon enough.

the responsibilities will be over.

no more fights.

no more tears.

no more lies.

no more us. […]

1/10/2014 2 comments

re-opening old wounds

by pillarofsalt 1/9/2014

written by pillarofsalt

cut myself again today..purposely over the scar and the feeling of the blade going through my skin, see all that blood flow…. it was pretty amazing! the pain was such a sudden rush for me! definitely made me feel better than not cutting

1/9/2014 5 comments

I am in hell

by minky5 1/8/2014

written by minky5

My foster mother keep bribing me to tell her what’s wrong. But for some reason, I keep refusing. She kicked my leg and said, “Come on dear, please tell me!” I just got up and walked into my room, having a good hard cry. I never hurt so bad since I’ve been in foster care for a month and a half. Just fuck it all. Fuck life. I’m fucking over it. Kill me now. I’m done.

And to make matters worse, I found out my boyfriend was cheating on me, so I broke up with him. Now I’m alone because I had nobody else to talk […]

1/8/2014 4 comments

It doesn’t seem like anything has gotten better

by jacklee 1/8/2014

written by jacklee

I tried to kill myself about a month and a half ago. As a result, I was forced on a medical leave from my school, had to go back home where my parents make my condition a lot worse, and forced to speak to what feels like an endless amount of therapists and psychiatrists that neither know what they’re doing or care about me. I was promised a second chance after it happened, that I would get help, in my mind I thought maybe if I finally talked to my friends and family about it, things would get better. Instead, I’ve spiraled, I feel more […]

1/8/2014 3 comments

Hi im new, and this is my first time telling anyone ever about the real me.

by Stanger 1/8/2014

written by Stanger

Hi, My name is Christian and im broken, but i cant help but look the opposite.Â I’m 18 years old and am not entirely happy. I’ve Â tossed myself through the past two years of life without any consideration that maybe I’ve been hiding that I am miserable. I really dont know why, I have a good family an incredible girl and enough friends. Why am i so depressed? Am i just bored? Am i really that shallow? I can almost pinpoint when life hit and theÂ faÃ§adeÂ that my youthful mind had created Â fell through. It was after i started using drugs, i was like eleven or twelve […]

1/8/2014 6 comments

The perfect suicide method

by Engeltje 1/8/2014

written by Engeltje

Everyday I feel worse, but there are days that I feel really really bad. Like today. I constantly think about suicide, which is driving me crazy, because somewhere I know I’m not able to die, no matter how badly I’ll try. But still I’m searching all over the web to find ‘the perfect suicide method’, but I know somewhere that ‘the perfect suicide method’ doesn’t exist. But still I’m searching for it (man, i feel like an idiot now). No, my suicideplan isn’t completed yet, but in days like these, my suicideplan gets completer and completer, which actually gives me rest.

I haven’t found ‘the […]

1/8/2014 11 comments

A solution… With side effects

by RogueShadow1281 1/8/2014

written by RogueShadow1281

It must not be a good thing necessarily that I’m cured and yet I’m wanting the thoughts. The dark ones back. I love talking about depression and suicide it was my life only months ago. Somehow I was cured. A sense of pride in myself alien to me fills me with self-confidence. Where the confidence came from would be completing basic training for the military.

I came in hoping that during the shooting range i could pull the trigger on myself and if not then then j would be able to shoot myself during my military career. The thought of having a rifle by my side […]

1/8/2014 3 comments

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