https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DYatfNZ20wY
😀 Enjoy
It really sucks when you attempt to kill yourself, or talk about killing yourself, you have to go stay in a psychiatric hospital for however long. I know that there are some facilities that are awesome and are really helpful, but it seems that most of them don’t do any good.
There you are at the lowest point in your life and absolutely miserable, and then you are forced to go stay at a hospital with all of your rights stripped away when really the best thing is for you to be in your home where you are comfortable and can go about your life.
When you’re […]
I have what’s known as a Floating Support Worker, who I love dearly. He’s an Oxford graduate (Classics) in his early twenties, he’s doing a Masters in ‘Early Intervention in Psychosis’ at King’s College, London. He’s quite posh – he’s from Wales but has no trace of a Welsh accent. Super intelligent.
I told him I come here, and I told him that I was recently sent a free sample of (supposedly) ******** after an exchange of emails with some guy in India. I took a little just to test it. It tasted foul, but did make me a little groggy. Without a tester kit (you […]
Things are a little shaky in life.
All thanks to one person. It’s interesting, what one person can do in your life.
*sigh* Well, here’s another video of mine. I hope you like it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2TPZIr0PUZ4
Sincerely,
Nobody915
i dont think i should even feel so bad. but im deppresed. i feel like im falling falling or rolling downhill painfully and it sucks. i can barely avoid the thoughts of suicide, when im eating, with friends, trying to sleep or any other moment at all. i just cant keep them out. im so afraid ill start to like them and eventually ACTUALLY love the thought of death. whats barely holding me in place is a caring girlfriend, the knowledge that i CAN get better and the mere thought that im human and i can BE.
so basically. today. i went shopping with my mom. she started yelling at me and telling mw how negative i am and how that’s why no one wants to be around me. i plugged in my music and blasted it ignoring her and left the store. I walked to where the second floor has a hole looking way down to the first floor. for a moment i was overcome with the urge to just jump off. it would have been so easy guys. but my mom tapped me on the shoulder and i pulled out my earplugs as she started to yell again and we […]
Edit: Wow… No comments, and my post is buried on page 3 (currently). It’s time for death I believe.
Well, seems I cannot escape suicidal feelings. I was sure I’d go through with killing myself the last time I was here… but… I hung-on. Things got better. Now everything is downhill again. (Or uphill, depending on your view.)
I was jobless, and felt unloved. I met some people, re-connected with old friends. It seemed like things were improving. As usual, it was an illusion. I always end-up back where I started. Having nothing, and being alone.
My dog is getting put down next week. He’s old, and he’s […]
what would you do ?
So the only reason that I didn’t cut is because of 3 things. My guy friend who I really like, my mom and because I lost the blades that I cut with. Each day I would go rummaging through my room to find the box that I keep my blades in, because I needed my fix of seeing that blood flow down my wrist, and because I needed to feel the pain. If you’re a cutter, you know what I’m talking about. I finally found them on Thursday last week and I was so happy. 3 weeks of not cutting was kinda hard.
that the only way to maintain my sanity is by going insane
“I felt the Lord begin
to peel off all my skin,
and I felt the weight within,
reveal the bigger mess… that you can’t fix.”
What is your definition of social introvert and socially awkward?
Have looked up on this but would appreciate individual inputs.
I try to conceal my misanthropy by claiming to be an introvert. Presumably that is less off-putting to others and makes myself feel better. But after a handful of backpacking travels and interacting with people from and in other countries, I have come to conclude that the human heart STINKS just the same no matter where you’re from. What color or gender.
I used to think it is because I live in a third world country (save for the capital city), surrounded by low intellectual and […]
No matter how I try to be positive and make things better, there’s always an anvil waiting to fall on my head. There’s just so much crap one can endure. My perfect day is Friday. Sayonara.
I’m a human . No other specifications needed . But I’m a bit different , then again I’m not. I’m classified as well, bipolar, suicidal and I tend to have hallucinated like things which im not sure if it’s the isolation. Any who , I just wanna know how you guys do it . How you “power through” for so long . It’s really amazing , I know a lot of my friends with similar issues but . Is it really just switching off the sadness because I never quite understood that . And I don’t tell people my problems right now my best […]
I’ve suddenly found myself in a situation where my life is about to come to a full stop. I’m 29 years old, hold a Master’s degree, and was previously living a very good life. After graduate school I got a job working in a niche consulting firm. I was there for a little less than two years and decided to quit because I was unhappy on a daily basis. Instead of finding a new job before quitting, I impulsively decided to travel the world for three months and come back without any plan. After coming back from my trip, I was offered a great consulting […]
I’m 25 and currently 19 weeks pregnant for the first time. I have been depressed all through this ordeal. In the past I’ve had a bad habit of cutting, there are 3 scars on my arm where I cut very deep on 3 different occasions. I also cut my wrist which left a scar. I have not cut while pregnant but am still very depressed. I guess I’ve been depressed for a while now. I’m stuck at the house most of the time. I worked as a barber for 1 yr but had to leave due to being harassed and have had no luck finding […]
I can be used as a bad example
Every night, sleep is difficult. I feel so alone, which is probably the most ironic thing I’ve ever said, considering my brother is my roommate. But yeah, it’s just…impossible. It’s probably when I feel my most depressed, which is completely inexplicable, because during the day it’s pretty bad too. Bad enough to where I’m just…incapable of doing work, which somehow seems pretty nonsensical. I’m just like, “fuck this,” which is just about the ultimate recipe for failure.
I’d hang myself with a bed sheet if I knew how to properly tie a noose, and if I knew how to properly secure […]
I know we shouldn’t go around feeling like our life is a failure, or that we are a failure. Â And I never felt that way until these last couple of years where I’ve been pretty useless, I suppose that’s the word. Â I got badly injured 5 years ago and haven’t been able to accomplish anything; even getting out of my house to get to the store to feed myself when I can do it is like the biggest victory I can muster up. Â I guess I feel so hopeless and so futile and like a complete failure because I don’t quite see myself improving physically, […]
Getting better is a long journey. I woke up and the first thing I told myself is that I wouldn’t die today. I decided to set daily goals. Small things, baby steps.
I’m scared, I feel like if anyone got close they could actually smell the sadness emanating from my pores. I’m anxious and insecure. But I will fight this. I will not let my emotions take control over me.
I went for my weekly doctor’s yesterday as I mentioned in my previous post  http://suicideproject.org/2014/02/anywhere-but-not-there/. She was very weary of letting me stay home as I had put myself in a […]