It’s hard to breathe when I serve no purpose.
I have nothing keeping me here.
I’m like a balloon on string connected to a rock, earth is the rock.
My string is coming loose and I’m bound to float away soon.
Ha, 16 and thoughts like this. Kinda sad, but I would help it if I could, I just can’t.
Living, breathing, laughing, smiling, it all seems so difficult and out of reach.
I’m unable to handle it all.
Have mercy on what’s left of my soul.
Depression is taking over and I’m trying to escape.
One option.
One solution.
One blade, a big […]

I suppose my story is still waiting to happen. I’m a cutter, I’ve felt suicidal for so long now, but I’ve always been too weak to do ‘enough’ to finish the job. I’ve tried twice, I woke up both times. I don’t really know why I can’t bring myself to do it. I feel to alone, so worthless, so useless, so fucked up I don’t know why I’m here anymore. I’ve been going thorough this alone for 5 years, I’ve tried confiding and trusting others to help, but I just end up with a knife in my back. My own mother called me messed-up when […]

I would love to take my life today. Just like I would love to take my life everyday. But I have a a fiance and a little sister to take care of. And I love them more than my desire to disappear.

Hmmm… What about getting a police officer to shoot me instead of me shooting myself? No one would get hurt except for me AND it would be recognized as a suicide attempt.

So either way, I win.

And then of course, with the recent spike of shootings, cops are sure to not take a second chance. So I figure that I just bring a gun–it wouldn’t even need the clip–and just pull it out and aim. Then the rest is their doing. In my suicide essay, I would make sure to clearly state that the cops aren’t at fault and that the whole thing was a suicide attempt. That way, […]

I thought i would ask if anyone knows of pro-suicide or pro-life communities for me to check out.

These are my little brothers words.  And he really meant it.

He used to look up to me so much when he was younger, I was always there for him whenever he needed me. But after finding out I am gay and atheist, he completely ignores + hates me.

It was his birthday today, and I just wished him a happy birthday and wanted to give him a brotherly hug and he said “Fuck off fag, no one likes you. Why don’t you just kill yourself please” and I was just like “…….”

He doesn’t know how depressed I am, he doesn’t know that for the past year I have […]

It’s been a while since I been here. I’m sorry that I disappeared, friends.

Of course everyone here is inundated with their own grave problems, so the absence of an internet stranger is hardly even worth noticing.

Anyway, I went AWOL for a bit because I was convinced I could change my life – maybe even fix it.

You can only imagine my I’m back.

*****, whore, slut that’s all I ever hear now. I found a guy I thought it was going  to turn my life around. Then the ex gets involved I’m not apparently the new school whore. I’m so lonely I have almost no one. People say they care but you know they really couldn’t give a shit. I just want to be loved have someone there for me someone that I know they love me. Everyone hates me I’m such a freak I screw everything up. I don’t know what to do. I hate things so much I wanna just walk away from my life sometimes.

He called my name

I walked away

Now im wishing i would have stayed

We walk around

Both looking at the ground

Scared to catch the other staring

But we both move on with out a sound

Remember the first night we kissed

I hope im not the only one who misses it..

I’m stupid for still loving you

My hopes are childish like i am

1 year younger, worlds apart

Here i sit with a broken heart

You said you wanted to ask me somthing..

Now im wondering what

But i lost my chance to hear it

By my own stubborness

Forgive me

For loving you

More then you could ever love […]

my manager is a **** where the fuck idid mypes go th ‘nice’ obe fuckeb ignorant people there are  no soci skills or feeligs to others sensitivitu only i can feel how it os fuckig **** i am am takig my anger out i dont owe no apology fuvken botch god fuck ji feel.eachday yes im slightly exaduratig  u i gorant cunts yet im overreacting but this is me getting.my anger out. try decodeig that .us christ his torture that he supsosedly endured wasmaybe half of whaany

So some time ago i took a whole bottle of Prozac and some muscle relaxers so i wouldnt wake up, well as you can tell i did, but im just curious what damage i couldve done to my body. Received a phone call to prevent me from doing it, woke up, threw up a tiny bit and fell back asleep, next morning i woke up my entire body was shaking. Anyone care to explain what the damage is?

I was only trying to help! I just wanted to resolve a conflict, or help it. Im sorry! I didnt mean to upset anyone, I just hate seeing people argue! Im so sorry!

In the pitch of the darkness, can’t differentiate between the good and the bad. Only know pain.

unlike  the majority of people i actually feel sorry for adam as i can relate. i think i could have saved his brainwashed mind by the healing power of relation. i am just like him and it hurts me so much i can only imagine his pain .  adam youre not alobe. you have saved me in many ways . thankyou sincerely

i realised something the other day. i usually cut whenever my old cuts heal. like, when the cut gets all shiny and pink and fresh skinned… that’s when i need to cut again. i realised this the other day after a little incident at school the other day. i cut after that. the urge, no need, to cut was really bad. i looked at my thumb, near the end of november i tore my skin – the spot between the middle joints in my thumb - open with a pen lid i put tiny ridges in with my teeth. that cut was fresh skinned and pink and shiny. then […]

So i am back guys

it has bee a year since i had last been on

here saying i was quiting cutting & pills…

that wish is long fucking gone.  My cuts are worse than ever

i almost died & had to go to the hospital for a week cause of pills.

I have to say job well done to life ; you really made me live in

fucking Hell…..

//

Yo, pops. Whats up? Working again? Pops, you are getting old. You ARE old. Don’t overdo it ok? I miss you. I… I don’t want to come back. But it looks like i will have to. Pops i didn’t want this either, im sorry. I don’t want to see that expression on your face again… I don’t want to cause you any more pain. You must be tired right? Its okay pops, you can rest now. Im sorry, i really am…. But it looks like i dont know how to express it. Doesn’t matter anymore does it? Good bye dad,forgive me, and forget me. Let […]

Ive have procrastinated wrting this paper and i cant seem to get started so i just just keep cutting myself instead of writing it!! Writing always has made me want to die and i cant kill myself now and fianls are tomorrow so i cant skip!! im in 11th grade.
I really need a Macbeth paper that compares and contrasts any of the following things:
the degree to which Macbeth and Lady Macbeth are responsible for the out come of the play.
the possible reasons behind lady macbeth and macbeths hallucinations
macbeth at the beginning of the play and at the end of the […]

When your parents raise you one way, but act another. I was raised to never beg anyone to stay. And be optimistic. Things can always get worse. I was raised to love and forgive but always know what you deserve and my dad is doing the complete opposite and asking me to do the same. Im over this shit. Im not begging, Im not saying sorry, mostly because Im not wrong. He wants to say oh “You and her ruined my life” Like are you fucking kidding me, Ive sacrificed my pride for you to fucking be with your wife but its my fault?  God! And you know what….I […]

So this past week my ex has been texting me? Strange right. Am i just his back up for his sex addiction? Like after him & Meg broke up he went to me while he was talking to Brook, Yet he tells me Brook cheated tf? Im not your sex toy… your 16 stop having sex..