i hate me so much right now
I have tried just about everything. I started trying when I was seven years old and have not been successful this far. I am 42 and am in chronic pain. My health is failing which as you could imagine makes one very depressed. As for the gun shot I didn’t try it myself my brother did it for me. At seven I received a gun shot directly into the eye and spent six months in the hospital. I lost an eye over it and a lifetime of pain. Today my health is failing because of the damage that gun did to me all those years […]
i was never happy. how could i be? i am colorblind. i can see colors…but they have no meaning. no feelings, no happiness. there are 7 billion people in this world. i am only one. one. just one. small and useless i waste away. my past haunts me, nagging at my every thought. happiness is only short and temporary but i soak it in while it lasts. im sorry. ok im not fuking perfet, get over it. i might not text back right away. i might not always smell ilke rainbows and unicorns. my hair might not be amazingly lush and flowing, i might have […]
WHY SHOULDN’T I GIVE UP NO ONE CARES
NO ONE HAS EVER TRIED TO HELP ME
THE ONLY FRIEND I EVER HAD KILLED HERSELF ;~;
C
Will someone just kill me I beg you
Ive tryed several times, and im very setiois aboit ending my life, itz just my survival instinct wont let me..but i will find a way to over come that and die.
So I’m kind of hooked on the idea of starting an ask blog. Sort of like SP but with anon and advice, daily inspirational posts, stuff like that…
What do you guys think? Â Hit, or miss?
i have been feeling very tierd for the past few days…..memories are haunting me…..they are killing me slowly….and making me feel like i am an ignored piece of dried shit sitting at the side of the street……..i feel so tired to even cry…..im remembering everyone who let me down  and gave up on me……i dont know what i have done to deserve this….i am 19 my birthday is next month and ill be 20….im not yet in college i feel like a failure….no body listens…..nobody cares and no body asks…..dad said im cheap….and he also said he doesnt have money for me…..but he does for […]
don’t take this seriously, but i literally cannot smile
it’s not tht im some sort of gloomy person that im so non-emotional all the time. but its so hard for me to smile. no, i’m rly serious, i cannot even move my mouth that wide. my cheeks are so puffy when i try to smile. it’s just all tighten up for me. is there anyone who’s reading this can’t smile like me? like, it’s just hard for them to move their mouth into a smile?
/\ […]
Soo  my mom had me stay home wiTh my sister so she could have someone to go to the dentice with her. Well I let her work onn my hair and she started to push down on my neck I was telling her to stop cause she was hurting my neck. Well she got pissed and told my mom and they started to biych at me. Another hard day.
Truth is this is jus an outlet. I need my input… The correct input. Put me to sleep n leave forever ion care. Just put me to sleep.
Hi,
I’m new here. I guess I came across this site trying to find the best way to end everything. I’ve spent the last two days just reading everyone’s stories and it makes me feel guilty for even feeling this way. Some of the stories I’ve read are so sad and I feel like in comparison, what do I have to be depressed about. From the outside looking in, it probably seems like my life is great. I’m that girl that is always smiling, always trying to make things better and always laughing. People don’t seem to understand that you can fake it all, I go home […]
Riley,
Our journey continues in my mind. We converse, we laugh, we dance, we engage in battle with zombies, we awaken the Harbinger in the ones who are lost and suffering. I know you’re suffering right now and it’s torture for me. If there’s anything I can do, let me know. I begin school in the spring (I hope) to obtain an associate’s degree in Physical Education. The Vampire Order grows and it seems as if my friends with Anonymous have the same intentions. I have discussed joining Anonymous with the Order. We feel at this time, we will remain separate, as we draw inspiration through […]
I was having a brilliant dream.
I want to go back. I want to be dream me. :/
It was the weirdest dream I’ve had in a while, but it was great because the reason it was so weird was that it was so vivid and realistic. The kind of thing where you wake up and go, “wait…” Ha.
But then you realize none of it is real.
My heart hurts.
I went to school today. I waited for a few minutes before getting out of the car because i saw someone who might be my friend and I wanted to avoid talking to him. I got into school and in one way had all these thoughts rush into my head but also felt numb. I almost stared hyperventilating. When I saw my “group of friends” none of them even got up to hug me. I hate how I feel inadequate to the people who are supposed to be my close friends. i can’t even talk to them about anything even a little negative because it […]
I knew this would happen, I fucking knew it. Promises don’t count once the relationship ends, do they?
I promised Luis then when this time came I wouldn’t kill myself. But I really can’t take this anymore, Today was the first day back to school and the first thing to happen was one of my really bad headaches. :I Then during second lesson and break I felt a mental breakdown coming. What pushed it over the edge was an email from a ‘Friend’ saying that he didn’t want to deal with a suicidal friend. Which is nice. And now.. Well, I’m fucking suicidal. I just don’t […]
So school starts tomorrow. I’m so not happy about it. I’m losing my best friend to someone who’s just like her, and apparently is so much better than me. Clearly, everyone’s better than me. Last night, I was alone. I could barely breath, I just felt like a huge weight was on my chest. I cut my leg with a razor blade that I’m going to take to school just in case. The past couple days I’ve been numb. I can’t feel a thing. I’m so depressed recently. I’ve stopped eating as much as I used to, and I rarely laugh. I was […]
the first cut is always the deepest…
I just want to quit.Give me 5 good reasons to stick around…
For Christ’s sake!
If God really loved me, why would He do this to me?
I cant ever be happy,like truly happy.
Am I really that easy to betray because I put myself out there and give everybody every ounce of my being?
then they see I give them everything and just betray me…What did I ever do?
Am I really that bad?
It is really frustrating to put myself out there only to be betrayed and backstabbed….
This might be my last post……
No one would care so why stick around?