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May 6th, 2005by Sandra

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12

can’t go on

May 6th, 2005by Sandra

My husband of fifteen years left me without warning on November 4th, 2004, we had both just celebrated our 50th birthdays . No sign, I saw nothing coming, neither did his or my family. We have no kids.

He assured me no other woman was involved. In the weeks that followed I discovered on the internet that he had been registered since June on a web dating service and had found someone.

We have a company together to which I no longer have access. Many things had been hidden from me there too.

In the last four years, I have had …

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Everything is different behind a smile….

April 4th, 2005by Jraffles07

People think happiness is just found behind a smile, but behind a smile is alot more than happiness. For the past 15 and a half years I have hidden behind my smile. I have hidden my tears, my thoughts, and my fear of death. The habit of hidding my feelings began at a young age. As a young kid, I never really thought there was a need to express an opinion. Suicide was just a joke to me and thought nothing of it. When I was just five years old my mother filed for a divorce. By the time I …

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Real Loss

March 22nd, 2005by justin

I sit here tonight as I do every night, wishing that I had the answers to this tragedy that seems to be consuming so many people every day. I didn’t realize that there were some many suicides each day. Now that I do know, I know that we are losing really beautiful people at an alarming rate! My son died by suicide six months ago. Everyone thought that his life was perfect! He was 19 years old, in college, had his own place, handsome, so many friends and no one knew the pain that he must have been hiding. He left …

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dark days of surviving a suicide

March 22nd, 2005by justin

My beautiful, wonderful, healthy, happy, loved, intelegent step son killed himself this past Sept. by a gunshot to the head. He was 19. The days since then have been filled with nothing but agony. I find it hard to work, to sleep, to do anything I ever enjoyed. It’s hard to laugh anymore. I’ve got a 10 year boy that I’ve got to help get thru his hero’s suicide. If he would have known the horrible tragedy that his death would cause, he’s still be here. His girlfriend just wanted to move on and didn’t, the end. There is always someone out there to talk …

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Tired of Living and ready to Die

March 5th, 2005by Essb

I dont know why I am writing here, it feels like waste of time. Pretty much how my life is anyway, a big waste of time. I ussually keep things inside because I believe people dont really care about much anyway other than to feel superior when someone else has problems. I never trusted people much anyway, lets face it people have instincts as much as animals, they will cut your throat to save there hide in most cases. Anyway I will share a little bit for what its worth. I hope you all believe in curses because its obvious to me that …

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So much pain

February 24th, 2005by kerria

Today i said goodbye formally to my therapist, he knows as well as i do that i’m not ever getting better. We lived divided too long. my life is a terrible mess. i can’t live with my family anymore- they’re too frustrated by my parts , all the forgetting , the crazy sobbing of kids inside.

My dog died this week. i never knew how important that dog was to my little ones inside. All there is is a deafening crying and “Where’s Chelsea.”? All day.
No one in my family understands how hard it is being a multiple- they think that i have demons and if …

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6

Sooo Tired

November 27th, 2004by geramie

Soooo tired. Sooo tired of living. Sooo tired of existing. Sooo tired of being suicidal. Sooo tired of being me. Sooo tired of living situation. Sooo tired of trying.

Before I was hit by a car, I had dreams. I had a bright future. After the accident, I have nothing. My life plans dissolved and I am in a quagmire of misery. This quagmire has no ending and no beginning. It seems as if it has always been. I have existed longer after the accident than I’d existed before.

Was in the hospital, …

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Living or dying

November 4th, 2004by angel22601

I spend most my days thinking about suicide. I want the pain to stop but it never does. I continue to do things to screw up my life more all the time. I lose job after job because I can’t cope. I can’t sleep or I can’t stay awake.I have been to cousling on always a short term because I can’t seem to keep the appoinments and they will no longer see me anymore.I just don’t know what to do anymore. I don’t know where to turn anymore. I feel loss all the time.

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suicidal, again

October 12th, 2004by maryx

After four great years on Seraquel I pooped out on it five months ago. Since then my doc has tried three medicines and none have worked. I had almost forgotten what this was like (almost!). Four years of peace after a lifetime of hell. Now, back in hell again. Sixteen suicide attemps in five months. Today, I’m out of the hospital again, at least for a few days. It always takes a few days until I’m ready for the next one. I feel so hopeless again; there’s such terrible mental pain; I’m crying. I’m here alone again, and I want to die.

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About Suicidal Survivors

August 7th, 2004by SP Administrator

Use this category when you post your story if it’s related to your survival of a suicidal attempt (or someone you know’s survival).

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About Stories of Loss

August 7th, 2004by SP Administrator

Use this category when you post your story if it’s related to a story of loss due to suicide by someone you know, an acquaintence, friend or family member.

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About Family and Friends Effects

August 7th, 2004by SP Administrator

Use this category when you post your story if it’s related to the effects of somebody’s suicide on their family or friends.

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Welcome to the suicide project.

August 7th, 2004by SP Administrator

Welcome to the suicide project. This site is a safe place where you may post about your experiences or your experiences with a family member or a friend who dealt with suicide (either successfully or unsuccessfully).

There is no judgment here and all stories related to suicide are accepted.

To submit your story, simply sign up for a free user account and then choose to Write a new entry. Also choose an appropriate category for the entry before publishing it.

If you are actively suicidal, this is probably not the place for you. Choose the suicidal resources link from the right or call a local …

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