Why do I still try? Everything I do is wrong, nothing is right! I hate my life, everyday I think god why am I still here! I would rather give my life to someone who deserves it, not me! I try following what my heart wants, I try thinking happy thoughts! That doesnt work :/ Why should I keep trying, no one cares about me! I think to my self, why was I ever born, why must I live the life I live! where I am depressed! Only one person makes me feel like I am special! He loves me and I love him! Sometimes […]

I feel as though i just drift threw life no feelings no nothing.I dont even thimk im me anymore.i dont feel as though im here i feel like like nothing is real.theres no point in being here if i cant feel anything anymore.gosh i just want to say f it and kill myself.thres nothing to live for anyway

I cant put into words how much i hate living.life really suck.nobody likes me,me friends dont get me and i feel so alone in this world i always wake.and wonder whats the point in life.I ask everyday why do god wake me why must i suffer eberyday.i blame myself for this deep depression if i had just ended my life the first time i wouldnt feel this way.its hard living this life

sometimes I wish I wasn’t here.. I wonder why I was even born or why I haven’t bothered to die yet.. why have I stayed even though sometimes in life I’m so close to being gone? everyone says you look so tough and that you have no issues your life is perfect. you get everything you want. well no. my life isn’t perfect. I strive to be perfect I strive to be what everyone wants me to be and I fail. deep inside I’m weak. I’m not strong. I wanna run up to people and curse them out for all the mean and hurtful things […]

Me, when are you going to realize, no-one is coming to save you. I want to love you so badly; and when I try to you say you don’t deserve it. Why won’t you let me love you? I want to so badly, you need it. Accept it, don’t turn away-please. I think I can love you, just let me in. It’s okay. I know you stay for them. You love them.

Every second I’m awake I wish I was asleep, but the cruelest joke this life plays on me is to not let me experience sleep. I fall asleep and immediately wake up 8 hours later (like everyone else). My worst fear is that when sweet sweet death finally comes, it will be exactly like sleep, and I’ll simply wake up seemingly immediately and be forced to be alive once more. I’m 25, and havnt learned a damned thing my entire life. All I did was play sports throughout my life until college where I picked up drinking and smoking weed. My life is horrible. I […]

Death is upon me. Goodbye Cruel World.

I cant take this anymore. I’m so sick of everything. I cant handle Anything and it seems like everyone around me cant stand anything I do. I cant be that bad. I cant be the one that ruins everything. But I am.
I’m a horrible person and I don’t deserve the life I have. I hate myself. Why cant people decide if they are going to live? Why does it have to be so hard to flip the switch?

Some people don’t get that. They say I over react, particularly him. The one person I cant let go of. Hes always there, always telling me […]

I cant do anything right. i Cant even commit suicide. Ive tried. ive done everything i could. He doesnt love me. I will never be able to cope with that. Im not good enough for him. im a failure. I tried cutting. I tried not eating. Ive tried everything. I cant do it. i feel like shit, and my only option is to feel it. i dont know what to do anymore. I’m just gonna cut everyone out. until i die. because i have no purpose anymore.

let me start by saying, i tried to kill myself in 2003 by slitting my wrists, i made a mistake of doing it outside and i made such a scene that i was found before i could end what i had started (pity).I have never spoken to any of my friends about that night.The only person who knows what happened is me so i hope i press publish (Which will be a big moment for me ).Roll forward to 2012 and the battle inside is in full flow.I havent had a job since 2003 either which hasnt helped me (i have something wrong with me which makes it nearly impossible for anyone to […]

I have thrown so many signs out for years now that i want to committ suicide and the people around me are so self consumed that they dont realize how badly i am hurting inside. I just want someone to recognize a sign anything and just say that i care in person not someone from the internet. my family and friends are so selfish. i hate this and i hate my life. my parents are too concerned about their divorce and my friends are too busy with their boyfriends.. where the fuck does that leave me? stupid idiot cunts!

Okay so i just cant stop watchng cyberbulpy i just wish i could stand up to the bullys at my school the way they. But if i did id just get bullyed more

Sonetimes i wonder why i still have to be here.you know my therapist tell me im lucky to have people who love me.but sometimes i wish i didnt so that i wouldnt feel so bad about trying to get out of here.

All wrong-doing arises because of mind. If mind is transformed (by thoughts) can wrong-doing remain?

Where you go, there you shall be.

Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.

Buddha

Its just another year of lonliness.
Just another year of pain.
Another year of me wishing I was somewhere else.

But at least its a new year. 2011 was the year when things went wrong. Horribly, terribly wrong. So wrong that i wanted to kill myself. 2012 could be better. But it could be worse. Hopefully it will be better. I doubt it though

-End

For as long as I can remember, I always thought that I’d live a shorter life than most people.  I’m not sure why.  But, it’s generally been a thought that has sit with me for many years.  I even had a particular age that would  come to mind.  Well, I’m that age this year.

So, I look at my life now and realize that I have several circumstances that are rather distressing.  Certainly, many people would say that “life for you is not over” and that I have many options, many good qualities, things will work out, etc.  True, people would also realize that I have […]

I hope doomsday is coming this year, as many think.
Then you do not need commiting suicide.

Any felling the same way??

I am just depressed extremely depressed severely depressed…….. and unloved. I hate myself, I really really really want to die. But most of all I want something to love and to be loved……

Here is a bit about me.  I am an adult soul trapped inside a teenage body.  I have OCD, but few know and nobody cares.  I have depression, but few know and nobody cares.  I live a life.  I hate it.

People say, I have so much to live for.  What?  Family – like they care.  Friends – who?  I’m going to be a successful person, blah blah blah – who the f*ck cares?  My dad once asked what would have happened if Albert Einstein wasn’t born.  The answer was someone else would have come along and done what he did.  So who cares if I’m […]

so its a new year, another year of my stupid and meaningless life.
my own family did not wish me a new year. they celebrated and wished on their own and i could hear their celebration but no one thought that i was there too. My best friend messaged me and called me but what a luck i got, he is in england and its impossible for me to judt go there and meet him.
I don’t know who am i writing to or talking to with this post. but i have a feeling that atleast someone around this world cares for me. I […]