I think I may have shifted my seat to the passenger while I let my best friends suicide take the driver seat off a cliff that dragging us both down now. Go dhow I wish I could have spoken to him better before ghe went. I’ve tried to kill myself a few times since then, but they weren’t actual attempts. just drunken cries for help, spoke to know one who would listen. I was a drunk man alone and desperate looking for answers that weren’t there. I want to just fin ish this fake race right now.. but friends and family hold me back. If […]
Looked out at the stars tonight. how they shined so bright… makes me remiss on our past. and how childhood could feel so blind. I wish you were still here. and not a day goes by where I don’t think of our last day. I miss you my brother, my friend, my teacher and hopefully my guardian.
Tonight was the final deathblow. The last few weeks I have been very distant, and I haven’t really kept in contact with anyone, as everytime I go to call someone, a feeling/suspicion that they don’t want to talk to me prevents me from calling. Anyway tonight I was in town and I got blown off by someone I was going to meet. So I tried calling a few friends, and it seems my feeling/suspicion was correct. Not one person who I thought I still had a shred of a connection with picked up their phone. Many more failed attempts at getting through and a few […]
I’ve been using her, i know. The only true friend i have who knows. I shouldn’t confide in her anymore. It hurts her. I feel like i’ve lost something… I should never have told her in the first place.
I cant take thing any more. I used to be a strong, lively person. I never used to get disheartened over any problems coming in my life. I fell in love with a girl 3 yrs ago. We used to have little fights now and then and everytime it was me who used to go to her and make it up, even when there was no mistake from my end. I have always been kind with her. I have introduced her to my family too. These days what ever i do she has problems with it. I try to find out whats the matter, she […]
I have been wanting to do it for years yet I have noticed that if i am to go through with it focus is whats needed. Focus and keeping everything locked up inside and not release any of it. I used to talk it out, then afterwords feel kind of better but regrettfull that I talked it out because I released that energy. When I used to talk out my issues I still felt suicide was the only option aferwards but did not have enough energy to do so. Often now even when I am happy (not often) I still know what I must do. Helium […]
I have mixed feelings about suicide. Part of me is so ready to be done with this life. And then there is a part of me that wonders if things will get better if I just give it more time. I have attempted suicide in the past – my first attempt was almost five years ago. I had two more attempts after that. But I was always found and treated. I spent the next few years in mental hospitals and treatment programs, trying to find a way to get better from the crippling depression that […]
This is just a little message to all of you who think your friends dont care.
A lot of my friends are suicidal and/or depressed. It’s rather torturous I gotta tell you. When you’re trying to help a friend your first thought of the day is never whats for breakfast, I should take a shower, etc. It’s “God I sure hope none of my friends killed themselves last night.” At the end of the day you worry if this will be the last time you ever see your friend. You lay in bed at night thinking “Fuck I sure hope I convinced them lifes worth living” […]
I have wanted to end my life for the past two years and the scariest part about it is I know i could very easily walk into my bathroom grab some pills or a razor and kill myself, I think that is the worst part. I have no one to stay behind for, I keep thinking oh well one day i will wake up and be happy. Its been awhile since i cried my self to sleep every night, eventually the crying subsided, i didnt need to cut myself anymore i did not care if i felt alive i didnt want to give myself piercings […]
I have been cut-free for 2 months. A week until it’s been 3 months. I keep having severe breakdowns and I can feel my depression coming back. Badly. I want to cut so badly. I miss the blade. I need it. But I want help. I want someone that I can talk to so I don’t relapse. The blade is 4 feet away from me. Someone, anyone, please help.
I swallowed 6 aspirins
Not much right ?
Getting a hell of a reaction
The only rule in this world
Is that we have to die
With enough naivety
We could enjoy the present
No, I’m not one of those
Who can live without any answers
Show me the end
Tell me what is our purpose
Are we stuck in this forever
I need to know
Cause what I feel is beyond anger
How could I possibly forgive the maker
Century of pain
Who put this blood into my veins
Useless puppets
Incomplete being
We are!
Corrupted angels
Useless puppets
We are living and dying
All playing the game
Of some entities’ gambling
Evolving for nothing
The result will be the same
life, you live, you dream, you die.
but no matter what, it goes on. unless you end it. life isn’t fair i’ve learned.
you tend to have regrets, i live in regret everyday.
but at that time it’s what you really wanted.
life can be hard and it never seems to end.
but someday it’ll get better, just stick around.
you save the best for last..
I know that the immediate impact on people around the person who suicides might be pretty intense for a short while, especially if they are someone who cared about the departed. But soon enough life goes back to normal and people move on and find other people, so aside from the grieving emotions which are short-lived I wonder if affects the evolution of our species. Does it strengthen the species by having less weak individuals to pass on genes, does it mess up the balance in favour of the rich (and poor) arrogant assholes, does it perhaps weaken the species as the bereaved individuals are […]
I attempted suicide the very first time when I was 10 years old in 5th grade. I lit my basement on fire. As I walked down into the basement after the smoke had filled it I blacked out. I cam back to awareness on the phone with 911.
Next when I was 12 I slit my wrists. I did it in the bath tub so there would be a more contained mess. I remember waiting and then suddenly I was all bandaged up. I have no scars.
When I was 13 I tried to overdose. I took all the pills I could get and went to sleep […]
Ive had contained a whole lot of suicide thoughts since I was only twelve. First time I cut myself was at the age of eleven. Everyone puts to much pressure on me and it’s hard to control the pain I have inside. My sister is a ***** and my mom always takes her side. I’ve attempted suicide once but gave in. I wish god could just make my life easier by just killing me. Maybe then all the pain would go away.
Been thinking about just ending it all for a while now. It seems like things would be so much easier. I just have all these problems, all I do is make mistakes. I often say things without thinking, or am misunderstood… this just leads to people not liking me. I always have somebody mad at me, usually my closest friends. I don’t have the best relationships with my friends. I’ve never really hung out with anybody, but have always wished to. I came close to going out with a girl last year for the first time, but she all of a sudden said she didn’t […]
I really can’t even find a reason to live anymore..
For the first time in my life, I’m seriously considering ending it all.
We all have these periodic feelings after something bad happens, but this feels real.
I don’t see a half-decent future in my life, immediate and long-term. Not career-wise and not socially-wise.
I feel like if there is a god, he is doing his mighty best to fuck me over, and I’m not sure I’ve done anything to deserve that.
I’m writing this now because a couple of hours ago I received news that basically shut the door on what I considered my only escape route out of this life while still staying alive. It’s […]
Im 13, i live in britian in a country called scotland. A few years ago everything was amazing, i had my family and my friends i loved live. In 2007 is where everything started to get worse, one of my grandfathers passed away and three months later my other grandfather took a sudden heart attack and died. Then i started losing constantrition at school, i couldnt think, i didnt want to have friends. A few boys bullied me, id get called lots of names, when i started high school, everything was okay, i was poplaur, everyone seemed to really like me it was good i […]