Positive thinking / radical self love
I saw this linked on facebook yesterday and agree with it 100%. Even my friend that I’m in love with, who has a real bad deal in life, believes this think positive crap. I’ve always said I’m living proof you can work as hard as possible, give all of yourself, put out 1000% and still not get shit in return. Seriously, go read the article because I can’t put it any better.
Hi. This is my first post being on here and I am sort of scared to share my story with everyone. But I will try my best to tell it in the least amount of words possible.
Well, I am 16 and I have bad thoughts almost everyday. I have hated myself for the past few years and I would say it really start when I was turning 13. I started to have feelings for my best friend, who is a girl, and I thought that I was some disgusting freak of nature. My mom was okay with it when I came out to her but […]
Hi, i’m guy from finland and i’m 17 years old. I wanted to tell someone about how i feel, but i dont have any good friends to tell about them and then i find this page. I hope this will help me keep going on because i have no idea what i’ll do with my suicidial thoughts.
I have lied to all of my closest friends and my family and now i think i should tell them about it but if i tell i dont know what will happend between me and them. I Think that telling about it will make my life harder and i’m […]
I have been depressed since I was very young. I’ve had bad and better periods, but it has always been there. I have accepted for awhile now that I will commit suicide at some point. The only thing that has ever held me back is the few people in my life who I care about, who care about me. I feel like a ticking time bomb, and that the longer I wait the more it will hurt others when I do it. I try pushing them away, but they see what I’m doing and try to comfort me by saying they care. They don’t realize […]
I’m confused on what’s going on, my dad gets mad at me for wearing makeup, my mom gets mad at me for the clothes I wear (skinny jeans and sweaters) she gets mad at me for the way I do my hair (straighten or curl) I do these things Becuase it makes me feel confident on who I am but to my parents, they put me down about it, they say my hair looks gross and that my makeup sucks and that I would be prettier if I wore dresses…is pleasing myself bad for them??
I have one more piece of paperwork to get done, my Medical and Financial Power of Attorney. The Will and Advance Directive are all done. The three documents need to be witnessed and notarized.
I’ve stopped taking my heart meds. My sleep pattern has become so erratic that I wake up and have no idea what time it is. I may have slept for only a few minutes or up to 15 hours. I cry constantly. If things continue this downward spiral, I will go to the Bridge. I feel like I am going mad.
I called a hotline for the first time tonight. I told the […]
I just booked a motel room in the Marina District of SF for a few nights. Gonna go visit my home away from home, the Golden Gate Bridge. Just a visit. We haven’t seen each other in a while and have a few things to talk about. I decided to drive over from Phoenix. I’ll be there in two days.
A clue about me…if I swear in a post…I’m in a reeeeeeally bad place.
I FUCKING hate this life! Why can’t I be a gun nut like so many in this country? It would all be over and done with.
I hate It when your doing so good then all of sudden something happens & then your like okay no problem but then bad things just keep stacking up & the next thing you know your driving & you start closing your eyes just wanting everything to be over.Like when your so down but you gotta pick yourself up cause your about to see family.Just when I’m starting to see a future for myself I always gotta do something to screw things up.I’ve had 8 jobs this year on my 9 & If this doesn’t work out then I don’t know anymore.
To be Honest- i don’t think I’m suicidal but I can tend to surprise myself. I’ve always been okay with my body till I hurt myself and started weighing more than I should. It started to make me more conscious when family would make a general comment.”you’ve gone big haven’t you?” it’s been a few years and since last year I made new friends and they would boost my confidence. My current partner boosts my confidence. My family bring me down and it’s worst because it hurts so bad and I try to change and make a difference but I’m so private about my feelings and […]
I get unnecessarily blamed for everything by my EX best friend for the last year. She’s a fucked up little girl who walks all over people and uses them, then twists it on you making you feel like you’re at fault and that you’re a piece of shit. For real, this time, I don’t think we’ll talk again. This time she’s gone too far, showing up at my house and laying her hands on me trying to fight me. All because her friend got in a fight with her ex over some stupid shit and was upset, therefore I’m a bad friend for hanging out […]
if your ptsd ever got to the point where you constantly heard his voice
or compulsively checked email and fb hoping someone cared enough to say hello
no one had your back, no family
bad memories only self hatred hating everything about yourself and your life
nothing did the trick
and all you saw was terror and homelessness around the corner
if even walking you had panic attacks and felt paranoid
if you felt they would soon come and “take you away”
if you felt you didnt deserve to live
if you had night terrors and heard actual voices, if you couldnt have a real partner
if everything you did was futile and left you […]
Was nice felt so light physically and mentally. A nice break. But be warned… had i a gun nearby i wouldnt be here i dont think. I conceptualized and pictured that and there was no hesitation mentally. Almost a feeling like it wouldnt be quite real or i could try it and then undo it. Hard to explain not a bad experience but maybe a bit dangerous.
The goods: Sleeping patterns and grogginess in the morning significantly improved even with my Xanax, Restoril and Seroquel taken right before bedtime and those usually leave me feeling pretty sluggish the morning after. Energy levels have improved somewhat, slight restless feeling mirrored with a slight feeling of being content. Less flashbacks and bad memories so far.
The bads: Dry mouth/throat, some hotflashes, some heart palpitations, impotence, content feeling but at the same time not happy and still feel like I have even more motivation to kill myself. I guess it’s like a trade, my body feels energetic and my mind feels a bit clearer but at […]
Hey
To be honest I don’t even know what I’m doing here or why. I think I just need to vent and maybe, just maybe, be “understood”. I don’t mean to sound like a childish teenager who no one understands and no one ever would, I just don’t know how else to phrase it.
I used to be really depressed, for 3 years actually, although that is mostly blown over now. Some things though never seem to go away, how I act and behave is still highly influenced by those defining 3 years leading up to my late teens. I get annoyed by people, and push people away, […]
I messed up really bad. I left my friend out of an activity that I planned. At the time, I didn’t do it because I dislike her but because I forgot. I have always prided myself on being kind. But I keep forgetting to invite her to stuff. I do not know why. I swear it is not intentional. I have apologized but it isn’t enough. I know she hates me now and it is all my fault. She is mean to me sometimes and now I can see why. I do not deserve to be her friend when I am always hurting her. And […]
I was already suicidal and then I found this girl online, an old flame. We started talking and seemed to have a strong connection. Then she started talking to me less and less! When I asked her what is up and to be honest, she said that she tried to look past it, but can’t stand people who are on SSI and welfare without working or goals! I was absolutely floored! Another rejection? She was all into me and then dumped me like I was a piece of trash and claimed that we wasn’t together in the first place.
I immediately got a 12 pack of […]
I go to a restaurant. They pee on my food and put buggers on it. I go to take a shower and pee is in my shampoo and conditioner. My dad calls to tell me to kill myself. Why do u wanna kill yourself?
sooo…, I guess I’m saying my story now. Mainly I’m saying it because a lot of people that share their stories feel better about themselves but really I don’t think I will. I just felt like I should so here it starts. So I’m in year 8, I go to a pretty crap school and to add to that coming home isn’t that fun either. I first started my school last year and I was soo weird in person and so very unpopular but when I got home I’d be this little lonely sad kid. Things got better, I still got bad mood swings but […]
Today is a day I don’t want to live
I don’t want to breath
I don’t want to smile
Thinking is out of the question
I want to cry and scream
I go through so many days just doing life
When I sit down and think about life
I drop
My mental thoughts decline
my smile fades to tears
I lose it
spending time on my own is bad
i decline to suicide
Death is pending
life is lengthy
I feel i have done my amount of time containing all the hurt i need
the broken hearts are unbearable
My life needs to stop
But i breath through another day
I just slapped my 5 year old brother. Before you jump to conclusions let me explain. Me and my older sister just got kittens, they were abandoned buy their mothers and they are only 5 and 6 weeks old. My brother, we’ll call him Mike, keeps grabbing them and squeezing their tummy’s and basically being really rough with them.
We’ll about half an hour ago, he decided that he was the kittens…. father, I got really annoyed because he was being really mean and loud. So, eventually I told him that he needs to let them be (he was also holding the hostage), and he started […]
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