Tag:

body

This pain in my stomach, won’t go away…

by thehusk 3/17/2016

written by thehusk

…That is a lie. There are times when I can go whole hours without noticing it.

But any time I have to do something involving conscious thought, up it pops. My body is hard-wired to react negatively to encounters with reality. Everything is just another sign that I’m inferior. That I will never live up to my own expectations. That I’m a failure as a human-being.

I’m trying to accept these feelings. This despair that smothers me. But it’s exhausting. I get a few hours a day when I feel strong enough to function, but the rest of the time I just want to curl up and […]

3/17/2016 1 comment

so…

by Alan Ominous 3/16/2016

written by Alan Ominous

Well, I’m facing some hurdles. Hurdles I expected. I anticipated. Yet, they’re still pulling me under.

My dream, is fair and reasonable, yet seemingly unattainable.

I laid everything flat out for my wife. That I’m giving it a couple months. I’ll either be moved out of the house, or moved out of this body.

It’s not taken seriously. She just kicks me anyhow. My date is set. I intend to send a selfie as I begin my departure. Hopefully, that will be an everlong painful image printed in her head. Vindictive, eh, paybacks a mother fucker.

Really, I just feel bad for encouraging anyone here. I mean, […]

3/16/2016 9 comments

I Dye My Hair!

by PrincessX_xPoptart 3/15/2016

written by PrincessX_xPoptart

Hiya
I called this I Dye My Hair! Because when I was 13 yrs old I started cutting myself aka self harm. I have plenty scars on my body. And I know they will be there forever. So I learned to love each scar and shows me who I am and where I came from. I will always have memories part of me. I’ve. Stopped cutting about like September 2015 so I was just turning 17 and I haven’t really done it since then. But allot I think about it. So I have a technique I used on myself. I started dying my hair a […]

3/15/2016 11 comments

Starving Myself

by PrincessX_xPoptart 3/14/2016

written by PrincessX_xPoptart

Hiya guys I’ve just made this account and lately I want to grab a hold of my weight I started gaining weight in like 6th grade and it stopped. Then I lost some because I had struggles with eating and I would go weeks and Months without eating nothing and if I did it was like a bite of something. Well this year I started eating again and adding weight to myself but I was never actually skinny. But now I am un comfortable with my body and my looks. And I pls on starving myself again or only maybe one thing a day idk […]

3/14/2016 13 comments

My Life

by Ylem 3/13/2016

written by Ylem

Is this thing I’m living even worth calling a life?

Where the fuck is this thing going?

Where do I see myself 10 years?

I see myself a depressed fucked up doctor slaving it out for my family that I love so very much, and still floating around in this world not even connected with my own body, just to keep them happy.

When the fuck am I going to do something for me?

What do I want for me?

I WANT TO DIE!!

That’s what I want for myself. I don’t want this thing called life anymore. It serves no purpose for me. I find no joy whatsoever in being alive. […]

3/13/2016 11 comments

Protected: I tried everything I could to not post today, but I did anyway.

by whiskered-fish 3/11/2016

written by whiskered-fish

There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.

3/11/2016 12 comments

Info

by Drowning 3/11/2016

written by Drowning

has anyone on here got borderline personality disorder ?

And dose depersonalisation come under that ?

I think that’s what I might have like I don’t feel attached to my body my surroundings or people like for instance I love my mum but don’t feel a connected feel alienated and alone

3/11/2016 2 comments

Broken phone

by beyondthepines 3/10/2016

written by beyondthepines

Broken phone. Broken body. Broken life. Broken relationship. He was the one thing that was good in my life, however deep his problems were too. I didn’t want to say goodbye, but my fate won’t allow it. My body is so broken, there’s not much time.

3/10/2016 5 comments

Being brutally honest.

by Bri 3/9/2016

written by Bri

So, one thing that pissed off my (ex boy) friend that I still have feelings for… I’m never honest. Of course for some reason he always knows exactly how I feel. He knew that I was crying, he knew I was panicking, he knew when I was lying. That made getting away with saying “I’m okay” and “it’s okay” religiously when I was at my worst a nightmare. I’m not used to being honest with people in my life. I post my darker thoughts here and allow everyone in person to believe that I’m just great. Happy go lucky Brittany so confident and full of life…

I […]

3/9/2016 2 comments

I Feel Like a Ridiculous Clown

by filmg1rl 3/7/2016

written by filmg1rl

I have an event to go to on Tuesday and it’s kind of a big deal. I’m getting an award. But my producing partner just had her marriage of 10 years blow up and instantly started jumping into rebound sex with some actor who she plans to take to the red carpet event.

I should mention that she’s pretty damn attractive. Tall, thin, blonde, straight… she’s going to look great.

And here I am now not wanting to go because I’m going to be stag, and I’ve never hated my body more than I do right now.

So here I am genuinely looking online to find a non-sexual […]

3/7/2016 1 comment

I’m Already Dead

by Counting The Days Until I'm gone 3/6/2016

written by Counting The Days Until I'm gone

Rather than equivocating death, I have conceded that death has already bestowed its unrequited love upon me. Simply so, because though I still breathe, and whilst my heart still thumps, the mere essence which makes each of us has perished within me.

It is as if though I’m only being kept alive by a hypothetical respirator and though this hypothetical mechanisations is working tirelessly, what sense is the life that its saving. For that individual can no longer be happy, can no longer assimilate to usual locomotion, all that is left is his bodily mechanisations and, in actuality life has already left his body.

My body, however is […]

3/6/2016 11 comments

My mother killed herself and I found her body.

by Goldie 3/2/2016

written by Goldie

My mum had always romanticized death. I suppose she thought she’d pass away, be found, and after some tears and a funeral, people would get over it. To say she was wrong is a vast understatement. I know my mum, and if she knew things would have turned out the way they did, she never would have done it.

Being that this is posted in what the effects of suicide has on friends and family, let me dump it all out.

I last saw my mum on a Friday and told her I’d pop by on the upcoming Monday or Tuesday. She seemed totally fine. I woke […]

3/2/2016 23 comments

I’m so tired

by disgusting 2/25/2016

written by disgusting

I hate to feel sick of working already when it’s my first year. But I feel useless and like I can’t ever be up to the level everyone else is on, and I’ll always be such a no good underperformer. I used to think I was smart but it’s not book smarts you need. It’s being normal, knowing how everyone else thinks, and creating systems that follow the normal thinking patterns that I’m clueless on. I’m sick of not having any energy, being so short of breath, coughing & gagging like a smoker when I’ve never smoked, being tired all the time and overall physically […]

2/25/2016 3 comments

Quintuple My Quentapine Please

by EtiLamb 2/23/2016

written by EtiLamb

Ah yes, another junky clean. I honestly want to stay off of shit this time around; I have no interest in being dependent on chems or people. I make enough money, and function well enough to maintain an addiction for years, but the problem is I know I would end up just dropping dead. Well, drugs normally drive me out of control with depression, and on an almost cyclical clock I make an attempt at suicide. Playing with your brain chemistry like I do results in incredible unpredictable mood swings. That being said, honestly drugs always helped me control my anxiety and anger levels, but […]

2/23/2016 2 comments

Depression is living in a body that fights to survive, with a mind that tries to die.

by Luke2015 2/23/2016

written by Luke2015

2/23/2016 6 comments

There are wounds that never show on the body that are deeper and more hurtful than anything that bleeds.

by Luke2015 2/23/2016

written by Luke2015

2/23/2016 0 comment

Light

by thelost 2/23/2016

written by thelost

Her head rises and falls with each breath I take, and perhaps it’s fitting considering the fact that without her I might never have taken those breaths. Her long, dirty blonde hair is pulled back in a simple braid, and I’m eternally grateful. It allows me an uninterrupted view of her beautiful face, which I have grown to so adore. I feel I am unworthy of having this beauty at such close hand, and to have it all to myself is incomprehensible. Her lips draw my eyes and I remember the feeling of pressing mine against them. The way that it felt as though the […]

2/23/2016 0 comment

Life at 360°

by noleafclover 2/22/2016

written by noleafclover

I discovered this site (thankfully) after a dear friend committed suicide. He was a godly man with a beautiful family and an extremely profitable business. I was looking for some kind of clarity and understanding. I have been throughout my life suicidal, but never acted on it; probably because I fear hell and at first, I had to spare my grandparents. Now, I do not wish for my 3 daughters to suffer.

I was prompted tonight to type this post, because my mom will be called upon this week to decide if Pop, my stepdad, should have all forms of sustenance withheld. He suffers from vascular […]

2/22/2016 4 comments

Late Night Thoughts

by sun prince 2/19/2016

written by sun prince

I’ve been having more suicidal thoughts than usual lately, and I’ve actually been thinking of ways I would want to go if I ever decide to off myself. Cutting isn’t an option; I’m too scared to harm myself, plus that would be extremely painful and messy. Hanging myself is off the table too, since I’d probably never work up enough nerve. My thoughts have been drifting towards drowning more often than not. I think that would be the best way to go for me. Although, I am terrified of the ocean/any body of water, I think I could make an exception. It would be easier […]

2/19/2016 0 comment

I am obsessed about my appearance

by agonisedvacillation 2/19/2016

written by agonisedvacillation

I can’t help it. I’ve always been short for a guy but it never bothered me until a couple of years ago when my hair started shedding. I don’t want to be short and bald. Plus, I’m convinced that my hair loss isn’t normal – I think I’ve developed some kind of food allergy because after eating certain foods my face looks like it’s retaining water and the circles under my eyes get darker.

My parents won’t let me get tested because they say it’s too expensive and they claim they don’t notice any of the issues I’m talking about. It makes me feel like I’m […]

2/19/2016 5 comments

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