These days it seems you guys are the only ones who do. Thank you.
Tag:
caring
I’ve been with my girlfriend for 4 years. I’ve lied and hurt her before, she’s lied and cheated before. We’ve separated for extended periods with no communication but always ended up together again. More than once, we’ve promised each other that we’d never leave, promised we’d always fight to stay together, promised we’d always be together. We have an 18 month old daughter together. Things have been rocky the past year because I’ve struggled with employment. Actually, the entire relationship, I’ve struggled with employment. I am a felon, so that complicates things for me but it’s not a violent or drug related offense. I’ve been […]
i write this to you as the only means of getting in touch with you. i would like you to know that i saw your posts, and that your words, caring and concern for a depressed, lonley, old man, touched me deeply. yes, it was my plan, and i was determined to carry it out. as is usually the case, the universe stepped in with a bunch of annoying distractions that prevented the follow through. i did end up in the cold for about two hours. i went to our towns christmas parade with my ex-wife. it was difficult because of my social anxiety,but pushed […]
Happiness. A word. I feel it at times, I feel a lack of it at others. I’m not always sure which one defines the word. I have been feeling as though happiness is making me feel empty lately. Maybe this isn’t happiness then. But why do I long for the hopelessness I fought so hard to escape from? Perhaps I never truly escaped. Perhaps this is just a masquerade of emotions to trick myself into living to fight another day.
Do I know who I am? Does anyone? Am I anyone? These are real questions for me. I have four distinct versions of myself. Family, girlfriend, […]
Just in case if I actually go through with it. This is my chance to say Goodbye to all SP members, have a great life ahead of you. You’re loving and caring people, you’re there for people when nobody else might not be there for him\her
I don’t know what to do anymore. It’s all so standard. I’m not giving up, mom. Lying in bed every day, not caring about anyone who never cared about me. I’m not giving up, dad. Sleeping until 5pm, popping the pills they gave me to relax. I’m not giving up. I just don’t know what to do since you’ve left. If you left, what’s keeping me here? I’m not giving up.
I have been cutting for about three months now. I cut my wrists, legs and stomach. I have been very good at hiding them, at least I thinks so, but now I have a problem. I’m sick therefore not going to school and left alone at home for the day. My mom’s friend is a doctor and my mom asked her to come over and check upon me, find out why I’m sick and how to recover. I’m so scared that the doctor is going to make me undress, because I’ve been to doctors loads of times before I started self harming and many times […]
I seriously do not know what I want anymore. There have been many times when I have a dream for my future and I have no support or confidence so I end up giving up on the dream and changing it. My mom wants me to do stuff that I do not want to do, I do not want to disappoint her, but FUCK! I want to do what I want to do! I have nothing! Now with all the stress my mom has brought down on me, and the stress of not knowing what to do with my future. I don’t want this, I’d […]
Im laying here in my bed. Wondering what kind of man i really am? I adore my children. I have a great job. My wife is good to me sometimes. Life shoukd be all dandy but its not!! My wife and i have been together for 7 almost 8 yrs. We fight alot and have grown distant, we differ on alot of things one being raising our kids theres her way(spoiling) then theres my way(stearn). Im blamed for being to hard on them because im the only one who is? Im the only one convinced im not a bad father. I fear my kids hate […]
I am lonely.
Mostly on days like today. I feel so completely alone though I am surrounded by so many people. So many people who might care, if I told them that is. But the thing is, even though I am surrounded by caring people, none of them notice.
Some days I get asked a simple question, “Are you okay?” and I know that I should quit lying. I should stop pasting on a smile and giving them some bullshit answer such as “I’m fine,” or on days I can barely muster that smile, “I’m just tired,”. As if lying to everyone around me will […]
Because I can’t care
If I cared,
I would already be destroyed
But by not caring,
I am destroying
…
….
I’m stuck.
Being 17 is such a crap age, so full of anger and hate towards everyone. People always ask me why i’m so angry, i can never explain why because i don’t know where all my anger came from. I blame my parents!
I’m have no idea what i want to say here, all i know is that i wanna write stuff down because i’m sick of making the most important person in my life feel like he has to help me deal with my past and problems, it’s not fair on him!
Anyway, I think i’m just going to list a bunch of things from my past […]
I want to cry, I keep going from feeling pain and hurt to feeling numb. I get really annoyed with certain people and I don’t know why, just them txting me will just annoy me. It sucks all of it the whole concept of life, of living. No matter how hard I try to care to want things for myself I can’t. I’m working and going to school and putting in all my time and efforts to being the best I can be, but at the end of the day I don’t care it doesn’t mean anything to me. My life is empty and I […]
We fought last night and the harsh truth came out. My deepest fears swam to the surface drawn out by his mouth. I begged and told him my fears and troubles and they were confirmed by telling me they were uncared for and deserved. My being, dignity, pride and any settlement in self were mashed all by his sewer. My place and image in the workplace shifted to the bad plain because of him and his embarrassing mouth trying all too hard to gain masculinity. I am uncomfortable in my skin, squirming with shame to get out because of him. Him,him him. I am apparently […]
You just stood there screaming
Fearing no one was listening to you
They say the empty can rattles the most
The sound of your voice must soothe you
Hearing only what you want to hear
And knowing only what you’ve heard
You you’re smothered in tragedy
You’re out to save the world
You still stood there screaming
No one caring about these words you tell
My friend before your voice is gone
One man’s fun is another’s hell
These times are sent to try men’s souls
But something’s wrong with all you see
You you’ll take it on all yourself
Remember, misery loves company
So I am new here, I’ve read some of your stories and from what I’ve read you all seem like such strong, kind, loving caring people.
I know people have this attitude towards suicide and the word strong does not come up very often.
However yes you are strong!
You have made it this far and I hope with all my heart something will come to you to help you through your dark times and help you towards a light (not particularly a religious one, but something that will give you hope to carry on).
I guess my story is a survival story, I am […]
Daaamn, I like him so much! Why can’t he see how much though?
He’s so sweet, kind, caring and nice! Ever since I met him my depression hasn’t been as bad, he makes me so happy.. Even when he’s being annoying or being a ****. He’s my annoying ****! He never fails to make me smile.. We can ourselves around eachother. He has such beautiful eyes, actually everything about him is amazing!
Damn age gap! I wish I had the balls to tell him, but knowing my luck he’ll tell me to get to fuck! Stupid feelings.
Is exactly how I envisioned it would be as a child. Fun things suddenly become boring.. days go by slower with less to do, people get angrier and stop caring about you. More and more of my day is devoted to being sad. I’m forced to do things I don’t want to with people I don’t like. Life chooses winners and losers. I’ve spend so much time trying to find a sense of meaning in anything, anywhere. Hope is a crutch for children  – bowing and bending until it shatters under the weight of your grief and pity fucking sadness. I don’t know how any of you find your way out […]
God, I don’t even know anymore. It started a couple of months ago and it was a song that triggered it.. I now seem to be a ***** to people now.. I get so angry over such little things such a someone not putting a lid on a pen.. I treat all my friends like shit, the ones that have been there for me for so long, the ones that know me inside out.. my best friends ): I push all my friends away and now I only hang out wiith people that use me for sex or whatnot.. I don’t know why because thdy […]
I was born with a loving, caring, and forgiving family. To most people, that’s a blessing. But to me, it only makes it harder for me to make them pleased, or even tolerant of anything. It only makes my life worse. I already hate me, so does everyone else, so my own family were like the only people who I could trust at all, and now they are like people I never even knew. It just sickens me to see what I have done to these great people, and what I can do to all those with a pure heart, unlike mine.