Quiet
In the silence
There’s a riot going on
Slowly
Going down
There’s a storm
In the mind
Of the wild one
It’s blackout
Or charge up
There’s an energy crisis
In his heart
Tearing him apart
Tag:
crisis
I left the house at 3:45 pm when I remembered I wanted to visit a few of the local thrift stores. I got to four out of five I wanted to. I found two pillows- a body on and a bed pillow. Just 30 minutes before I was unable to make a move towards anything. I was so down, I called my crisis line and just spoke for a ten minutes or so. Just enough to get myself going.
So, as I dash from one side of town to the other I am feeling- this is life! Yes! Just an hour ago I was going to […]
I guess that my mum’s depression and the suicide of his boyfriend made me learn a lot this past two years.
I know that everyone always say it, but you know it’s true: you need to look for help. Just tell someone what you are going through, call somebody when you have a crisis. They won’t make everything disappear, they won’t be there forever and they won’t probably fix anything, but having someone holding you in the worse moments does help a lot.
Depression tends to take us away from other people. We disappear of their lives and then we feel afraid or ashamed to call […]
I found this site the other night and from reading many of the posts and responses I can honestly say that I’ve never before been so moved as I have by the overwhelming level of support and consideration that the members of this community repeatedly give to one another.
The personal stories on here are some of the most heartbreaking things that I have ever read and it amazes me how people can open their heart to others even in the midst of personal crisis and turmoil.
I spent time in hospital with some of the most incredible human beings that I’ve ever had the chance to […]
I’m sorry you are going through a really hard time right now. I read what you say about your father and then, about how you are a bad guy. Can you see how your dad started that feeling and it is not your true self? We all do things that make us a “bad guy” of life. But in reality those bad things mean we were behaving badly and NOT that we are a bad guy. Please hear me when I say the fact you don’t like how you’ve acted is the start of a better Alek.
I hear your sorrow for being so sad and […]
I have been feeling severely depressed for the last week & a half. I think it’s a combination of things…been keeping a secret about getting back together w/ my on again off again boyfriend. Finally came out to my friends about it. They all hate him because of what he has done to me in the past. Severe betrayal that I won’t go into. One of my best friends is no longer talking to me. My other good friends dad recently died. He was like a second father to me growing up. That’s been tough. She didn’t even call me. Then I had my birthday […]
dear sp, i want to thank you, all of you, for saving my life. this episode has been a rough one, with closer calls than i care to think of. yea, life is still shit, and still not sure what all to do to fix it. however, i found a group of like minded people, with the same problems. how refreshing. all of your words touch the fabric of my being. i carry your pain and anguish as my own, as they are the same as mine. what amazing people i have found here. such talent. such wit.(kumbuyya moment folks, woo hoo) will we survive? […]
well, folks, made it one more day.went to appointments with whitecoats. they actually let me leave. i was pretty amazed. dont know what kind, if any, help they will be,but hey, a little effort is better than none right? i dont trust these people,and old bad memories are evrywhere. i would prefer a more holistic approach, as that path has proved the most successful FOR ME, the physical effects of this past crisis still abound. weak, tired, feel like i have been hit in chest with sledgehammer,cant breathe, thoughts slow and sluggish, but that nagging desire to end it has finally subsided. once again. for […]
Just sad. Thats all I am.
This is terminal, isn’t it? As in my time is pretty limited now. If suicide doesn’t get me in the end then anorexia sure will. I guess i’m pleased only im growing impatient. I know of very peaceful ways i can die. And yet i still sit here crying from the pain. I’m on the verge of making an official plan when i’ve only ever gone by spontaneous crisis moments before.
I’ve been in an endless suicidal episode recently. This just has got to stop. Am just trying to make it through this night without resorting to an overdose. Please make […]
In the midst of …crisis? drama? melt down…I don’t konw whwat. I just think that i’m not doing well. I am thinking about checking into a hopsital. But I’m so scared. I have ajob….what happens when you do that and you are suppose to wokr the nxt day? Will everyone find out? I don’t even want my boss to know. I kind of want to go in the hospital and never come out or just quit my job. I don’t wnat to give up but I dodn’t feel I have the brain for this job…which is to say I don’t have a brain for much […]
I haven’t been on this site in almost 2 years.. I thought abt it a lot but never had an opportunity to get on. I’ll fill yu guys in on Wats happened since last time I been here… I was in a foster home in merrillville where I started doing heroin. I got caught and tried to run away but the cops picked me up I was brought to this place called the crisis center (the A house or alternative home) it wasn’t so bad there I actually kind of miss it but of course at the time I hated it but I meet some […]
It’s been a few weeks since I have posted, and have come to the conclusion that it’s everyone else that’s screwed up and not me.
I’m convinced that whilst I may have my failings (needy and insecure) I’m actually a nice person.
Intervention by my doctor and local crisis team have helped a great deal, and my meds have been increased significantly. Got a testing few weeks ahead of me but that light at the end of the tunnel is now a lot bigger than a pinhole.
Have discovered an amazing singer recently too (Blossom Dearie) and would recommend that anyone in crisis should youtube her and just […]
Went to see my GP today for a repeat prescription. I was totally honest and told him everything. He immediately referred me time to the “crisis team” wtf is that all about?
I tried on Tuesday. Failed. Will not fail this weekend. No energy right now. Waiting for SO to go out so i can go out alone and do what has to be done. My therapist gave me a crisis line, lol. Like I would call. I don’t think so. I’ve done so in the past, jsut feel silly. I’m done .
I’ve wondered so many times why I must feel the way Ifeel? I still have not found an answer. Every now and then I used to break down, to live in crisis, cutting myself, drinking alcohol until i passed out, taking pills to lose myself, damaging every part of me for not to feel. I understand that i may never get this feeling “out of me”, I understand that no matter what I do, what I try, I keep falling far away, pushing everyone else, and theres only one thing else to do, not to try, because trying implies that I could fail, i will […]
It feels like the only way to get people to care is if your dead or in critical condition man I swear if I had a gun id blow myself away.i just got out out of the er for trying to kill myself twice in one day. They let me in the morning and by night time I was back and they let me go again.the reason im upset though is cause the psychiatrist said my problems are not considered a crisis. I dont usually speak up for myself but I wish I had told him to go fuck himself.i have put off suicide attempts […]
Hi, I’ve been in pain my whole life. I’ve been treated for depression since I was 11 (I’m in my early 40’s). I’ve tried every antidepressant and combinations (don’t tell me I haven’t, I’ve been a nurse for over 20 years, I understand the pharmaceutical interventions available) as well as behavioral and cognitive therapy, nothing works. In October of 2012 I injured my back severely because my wife asked me to lift her. I was on opanna, dilaudid, Percocet, etc. Nothing helped. I saw multiple surgeons, physical therapy, epidural blocks, and a chiropractor but nothing helped. The opiates affected my sexual performance.
My wife of 15 […]
Despite watching everything in my life crumble and dissintigrate into nothing around me, my best friend from home decides to text me out of the blue. After handling her crisis, she says to me, ” You have always been the strongest and most grounded person I have ever known and will ever know.” What she doesn’t know is her text stopped me from inhaling a rather large handful of assorted pills. Her comment…I don’t know if I feel more ashamed for wanted to take my life or if I feel better for knowing that I can keep my fading life under control for other people.
I […]
don’ take the things I say personally. I’m just creative writing, in general.
wat up. wat up. wat up. it took a bomb to crack the wall open.
on the other side, do you know? I wish that I could………..
ponder. I need to heal, my sinuses. God, I know you’re there.
in the story of the forgotten, and the forsaken.
the refuge of the messiah, was a dying morlock child. but why.
what does it mean. the ultimate crisis. salvation. mankind.
heal my stricken illness, let me become, the professor.
open my mind. I have done my time.
Xorn and the Genesis. Let me evolve. We can do it. Seraphim.
stop.
why can’t I stop playing this in-between. I’m not getting any better, I CAN’T get any better until certain things happen that just aren’t happening, that are out of my reach. And I can’t end it either. Why the fuck can’t I just do one or the other?
NO it’s not a matter of positive thinking. NO it’s not like I don’t know what I need. I know what I need and I can’t fucking GET it. That’s the problem. Why don’t I just MAKE the attempt so that they HAVE to listen?
No, I’m not making it up. No, doing fucking yoga isn’t going to help. […]