Last week I went on vacation with my siblings, and there were some fun parts definitely. But overall it just made me realize once again how high the tensions between me and the rest of my family are. My brother thinks I’m weird and (possibly) a freak, but he usually doesn’t show it intentionally. My one sister tries to be as nice as possible towards me, cause she is a kind soul. My other sister was annoyed the whole trip for some reason, and when she’s like that she usually lets her anger out on other people, i.e. me. It’s basically just because she’s mad, […]
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its not an easy life i live its far from it, the fact that i hear voices telling me i’m going to die and they are going to come after me till i die is extremely petrifying and that is just the tip of the ice berg i live in constant fear that someone is trying to kill , that someone is in the house trying to get me, i always hear foot steps as if they are right behind me, im scared to sleep of even shutting my eyes for that matter i don’t sleep for 3-4 days at a time till i pass […]
im going to see my doctor soon that’s specifically for my anti-depressants. I started at 50mg then 75mg and I don’t think I can keep going on in life with out more. Yes I’m depending on medicine to help me but it hurts so much without it. it helps for a while then I just have to up the dosage. What am I suppose to do? I keep getting urges to cut and sometimes I fall in to them. How am I supposed to fight self hate and self harm at the same time??
I can not keep doing this anymore and I know that I have tried and tried to keep fighting, yet when I do fight it’s never enough. I hate being shit on by teachers and by my own mother. The one who “loves you the most” doesn’t and well.. If people continue to do this to me (the making me feel terrible and the shit on) I am and WILL give up. I am going to cut and try to soothe the pain. The fact is, I do not know how to cope anymore.. I am done thinking that I can keep doing this because […]
I want to hurt myself. I want to cut and watch myself bleed. I want to take the pills and slowly die. I have had it with the suffering and sadness I put myself through everyday. Its all over for me now.. I don’t know when or how but it will happen and when that time comes I will let you all know <3 I am sorry that I am just another lost cause…
Do you have permanent scars? Self inflicted or not?
I’ve got a few scars on my body but you can’t notice them. Worst is on my right foot when I ran through a glass door. One on my right palm when I fell on some wet wood and sliced my hand on some metal shit. Another on my right wrist (off to the side) from last year I accidentally cut myself trying to put the lawn mower in the car. One on my left elbow from a sporting accident.
I’ve got one across my cheek but I don’t think it’s deep enough to cause permanent scarring, […]
Because it’s something that we wanna do, and when we’ve finally done it, it’s like an Achievement Unlocked so yay we feel satisfied.
Yayyyyyyyy
must resist…do…not..cut…must…not…cut…
Feeling so alone right now. Been a deeper funk than usual the past couple of days and can’t get out of it. I want to be alone but I’m also lonely. I’m just drowning in my thoughts. I can’t shut my brain off. All i want to do is cut.
let me first say hello to those who know me and know that I am well..
I know that I haven’t posted here in a while but I feel it is in need for me to post.. I am here because well I have not found that reason yet and well I do not plan on it. My story is complex and no one seems to understand that it will never get better for me. I know that it had been a long road for me and I have been fighting for so long to keep on going and well I think that my fight is […]
You did say that if my right hand caused me to sin, then I should cut it off than to have my whole body thrown in hell. But the thing is, I never said I want to be a part of any of your divine agenda–I never agreed to be born, and to put someone in this nightmare they cant wake up from, is an act of pure evil.
You caused me great pain from the day that I was born, and all I am worth is hell. WHat other unthinkable ways of torture have you thought of throwing at me in the future and in my life […]
BEFORE CONTINUING ON MAJOR TRIGGER WARNING AND I’M NOT RECOMMENDING ANYONE TO RESORT TO THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have been over consumed with death and suicide. I have been dealing with big upcoming decisions and stress. Also I have been suffering with a huge increase of panic and anxiety attacks. I do goto counseling and take meds daily. I am diagnosed with borderline personality disorder along with both mood and anxiety disorders.
I have been using my coping skills and yes they work, however it wasn’t enough. I have been exhibiting manic symptoms even though I’m not bipolar.
As a teenager I used to dabble in cutting and self mutilating, […]
If you saw me at school you would think that I was a typical 16 year old girl. I like my starbucks and uggs. I am nice to everyone and pretty much always have a smile on my face. Yes, I am bullied very regularly at school but I don’t let that effect me during the school day. If you asked anyone who new me just on a school level they would probably say that I am a very happy person but they would be wrong. I am not a happy person. I am actually very depressed, as is most on this site. I cut […]
My previous post was about my saving up but, due to recent events… I’m just going to do what I had in mind quite a few months ago… I am going to go out to the woods, take some pain killers, cut myself up(if that doesn’t work) I’m just going to climb up a tree and hang myself… No one will find my body, no one will care, no one will notice…
My life is just a nightmare that will never stop hurting me…
I have to end my pain… once and for all! :'(
Just any1. Any1 at all. I need to talk to anyone. I don’t want 2 feel like this I need to let it out. Im tired of holding it inside. I dont want to cut. I need a friend. I feel alone and scared. Im tired. Just someone 2 listen and not judge. please.
I cannot take it anymore .Whenever i close my eyes, at any time of day/night ,i see all these horrifying pictures of blood and violence on myself.Im haunted by monstrous bloody images of flesh and death.It lasts for approximately week or two, non-stop ,i hardly sleep more than 4 hours a night then.When it passes ,i always get painfully numb.It goes round and round. I cannot do this anymore,i need to cut,i need to die,i don’t deserve to be here i shouldn’t be here.Sorry im so weak i need to write it here instead of just finishing with that agony.I can’t kill myself because it […]
Hi, this is my first writing that I have done on here so please don’t be afraid to comment. I’m always here to talk in the comments and help people if needed. There will be a couple parts to this so that it doesn’t get to long. Thank you.
My life has always been easy most of the time. As I grew up I had an amazing family that cared so much but then I started elementary school. Elementary school was very easy till I got into Fourth grade. At this point in time I didn’t give a damn about my appearance and just was the happiest girl or so I was […]
I am trying to find the guts to cut myself tonight. I have never done it but thought about it often. I am scared of the pain but feel like I need a release.
Well….here i am again staring at this page not really knowing what to do anymore. I chickened out on telling my parents about my depression and the cutting has become more and more, when I first started it took me a few minutes before i could actually gain the “courage” to cut but now its become really easy an effortless for me. I know that I really need help because its come to the point that I’ve actually convinced myself that being bulimic is okay, not that any of my other friends have told me otherwise, all I ever get from them now if I […]
Im depressed. I told my mom that, and she made me start therapy. but i hate to say this, but its to late. She has no clue i cut, or have suicidal thoughts. I havent cut in about a month. And today is Christmas, so i should be happy right? Wrong. My new sister got more than i did, and im starting to just feel very down again. Everything would be so much easier for everyone if i was just dead. Im always in the way, and i can never be happy. I have no friends. All of them turned on me and i cant […]
I want to end up my pain not my life but to end up this horrible pain I need to die. I want to cut my hand’s arteries so I would die quickly in 15 minutes so even if they took me to the emergency there will be no time to save my life . I think this is the best solution for everyone and to make everyone happy . I don’t know when will I cut because I want to say bye to some people . thank you everyone in this website yes you were strangers but you helped me more than […]