I have been tired of breathing recently as I don’t feel the same anymore. My entire life has been going downhill and I am falling apart. People around my school notice how depressed and lonely I really am but they obviously don’t give a fuck, they end up making fun of me because im always depressed and they also gave me a new nickname which is “depression”. So instead of trying to help me get better they just make fun of me because I always seem down and depressed. I honestly wouldn’t mind dying sooner or later because nobody gives a flying fuck about me […]
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It’s been a long time since I was last here. About a year and half, to be exact. I thought I was really getting better but in the last few months, everything seems to be spiraling down again. I’ve read that it’s therapeutic to write about it, so hopefully this will help me.
In July, my boyfriend of seven months, Alex, broke up with me. He was everything I had wanted in a person and I woke up everyday with an overwhelming amount of happiness that I thought the years of suicidal thoughts and depression were finally leaving my mind.
If only I knew how wrong I […]
If all goes well this may be my last post here. I think I finally found someone, we’re talking about a plan of action.
I’m writing this to thank everyone here and give some constructive criticism. You are all good people from what I can tell, helping random anonymous strangers through there roughest times while going through rough times yourselves in some cases. I see this as a place that welcomes the strange, and the lonely, and the scared, with open arms. My only criticism for this community would be the people who only offer support that encourages survival. I will admit that in most cases […]
I’m sitting in my bathroom floor half crying half laughing. plus I drank vodka and i feel really sick.
So today is my birthday. And i used to love birthdays. As a kid i had a lot of friends. Now i have like 2 best friends. They suckkkkkkk
I decided for my 15th birthday to invite friends for a party. I found where mom hides her alcohol and i stole some of the drinks. Plus moms out of town so i have the house all to myself.
Everyone should have come in 9pm. It’s almost midnight. No one showed up. Not even my best friends. So i’m just […]
I live with my mum. I don’t speak to my dad much. He ruined my life, quite literally. I wont go in to detail, but he destroyed my childhood, which still seems to be effecting me now, at 15 years old.
He turned up at my house the other week, dragging so much of my past back up. I haven’t spoken to him properly for over a year now, and he had the cheek to tell me, his daughter that he doesn’t know and hasn’t known for over 6 years, that I’m depressed.
I mean, I personally think there’s something along the lines of that there, but he […]
Just wanted to let everyone know that I’m really thankful I found this place. I feel I can relate to a lot of other people here and it makes me feel a lot less alone. This is the one place where I don’t have to keep my secret and I can really be myself and no one will try to change that. I’m just appreciated and excepted. Thanks all!
In short i have a crazy mother no one can get to her when shes angry…
my mother doesnt care about anything else other than numbers….
i want to talk to her but i never could….
she doesnt care….
so why should i?….
i dont know what to do i am literally in a life or death limbo right now…
i will admit i really want attention but not from everyone but maybe just one friend?
ive always felt ugly. i am fat and ugly. i recently lost a lot of weight. i went from weighing 180lbs to weighing 145lbs but now i weigh 160lbs and i am just so ugly and weak. food is my weakness. i love food but i hate it at the same time. this happens all the time. i lose the weight but then i gain a lot of weight, i dont know why. i hate the way i look. it depresses me, it really really depresses me. i cry about it all the time. my body is a big issue of mine. i just cant […]
I just left home. I wish I had the strength to finish myself. I cannot see the next minute. I’m paralyzed. I’m by myself. I want to be. I’ve lived everyday of my life for everyone around me. I have big responsibilities. I would be ashamed to say what I’ve left behind. I don’t know what to do. I’m in my car. I’ve never NOT been depressed and I’ve grown tired. Weary. But here’s the thing…the outside world would be shocked. I’m that person that motivates and inspires. I’m a light of positivity. The energy it has taken me to smile everyday and try to […]
It’s hard feeling so alone sometimes. The nights are cold and long. My body is pretty tired and my mind is worn down from all the overthinking both positively and negatively.
I constantly feel like I’m losing everyone important to me. I have a lot of friends, it’s true, but I long for companionship. I need somebody to console me. I have lost a lot but I’ve thrown away more. I realise that.
It’s hard wanting love but not accepting it. The one thing I want most, is the one thing that I’m terrified of
Feeling unwanted is the sole reason I hurt inside. Yet letting someone in […]
So this is what I said:
Why do you ask?
Every week either gets progressively worse, or, it’s just the same droll, hermetic, life I don’t enjoy. I’ve lost everything but half my job. How could life be anything other than bad? I’m the loser that everyone laughs at. There’s no reprieve from the pain, so, I cover my costs and I shoot my dope (don’t get me started on all the precautions I take, I’m not trying to leave XXX yet). Thankfully, I haven’t been to jail or overdosed this week, which is good – considering my family doesn’t talk to me anymore since I refused […]
If I am weak or selfish shouldn’t I take responsibility for that?
Shouldnt I just get out of everyone’s way?
A hindrance is still an issue even if it only effects a few, it won’t get better til some sort of action is taken right…
The majority of posts on here seem like a cry for help, if I’m being honest with myself I’m just here to vent.
I don’t plan on committing suicide tonight, but one day soon I will. I’ve been depressed for 8 years which is a third of my life and all of my adult life.
I’ll never understand why some people are challenged in life more than others, why some people can live long happy lives while others suffer every waking moment.
I’ll willingly admit there are people out there who have it far worse than I do, but I am at a constant struggle to find a real […]
i didnt know what to title this so heres the song that im listening to right now.
its interesting how we all attempt to comfort each other when we all know how the other person feels. when someone wants to kill their self people say no, because its wrong, a sin, selfish, or simply “not worth it to end a beautiful life”, and thus try to prevent a suicide. but if you truly understood how they felt ten why force that person to live in misery?
now im not saying that everyone should go commit suicide but when a person is at their worst and wakes up every […]
So I just got my first job and I don’t know. I want to be happy about it but I feel like I’m just going to fuck it up bad. I feel like I’m going to do or say something stupid and everyone is going to remember it and I’m terrified I’ll be humiliated and I just want to cry even thinking about starting my first shift is making me want to burst in tears I don’t know if it’s just jitters or what but I feel like I’m going to simultaneously vomit and cry I don’t know what to do. I’m panicing so bad […]
I have no purpose. I have never contributed to anybody’s life. Everyone abandons me over time. Can’t blame them really.
Everyday I find myself hating my own life over and over again. He.. They just don’t get it. He.. They never will. I try to live my life as much as I can and I seem to not want it more and more as I go on. I have wanted to die for awhile now. It has been so hard to go on and I can’t seem to do it anymore. Every time I get close to doing so, there seems to be hope and I lose it. I lose it instantly and I am not happy. I haven’t been truly happy in a long time. I […]
Im sorry. I’m not the son my father wishes I could be, or the daughter my mother deserves. I have been, and always will be the second choice because I AM NOT GOOD ENOUGH. I’m not kind enough, not smart enough for my boyfriend, not strong enough for every one and their hardships, not popular enough, not worth enough. I’m not worthy of you guys- all of you are so courageous and talented and intelligent and thoughtful. I don’t deserve you- and besides, you all have each other. You don’t need me- You all have each other. No one ever has, and I just need […]
I’m not afraid to die. Actually I prefered if someone would kill me now. Remove the burden I place on everyone’s hearts. I cut and I feel better. Everyone says I’m sick but am I really? I’ve found release. Please let me die already
So here I am at 19, on a page for releasing thoughts of suicide or just flat out depression. Manic, major, whatever it is that gets to you.
I have had an awesome life so far, I’ve done so many things, and I have seen so many things. But these past few weeks I’ve just gotten hit hard with depression. The past couple days I have contemplated suicide. So tonight I tried it, I tried hard, but i can’t bring myself to do it. I had a belt pulled around my neck as hard as I could possibly have it, and I’m glad I couldn’t, because […]