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Just walked in thinking everyone thinks im shit (which they do). Its better then walkong in all happy, and excited thinking im just going to be nice and maby make some friends. But insted they are just fake to me and talk shit about me behind my back. This way they cant hurt me worse then i hurt myself. ? Is it bad that this makes me calm.
A good life – or – a peaceful death
A million dollars – or – for your life to end
The greatest love – or – an end to your life
Happiness – or – eternal peace in heaven
Just curious how badly does everyone wanna die?
If a genie came to you with one wish what would you choose?
To live life in the best possible way or to die in the best possible way
What would it take for you all to live more than you want to die?
I ask this question because honestly I cannot answer it myself
the last time i posted here my mom had just passed away. that was november 18. january 13 my dad died. to say i am overwhelmed would be an understatement. the monumental task of dealing with one unexpected death becomes herculean with two. at age 45 i am essentially an orphan. and i feel so alone. the busyness of making funeral arrangements, visitation, funeral etc etc gives way to the utter loneliness and despair of everyday life. everyone goes back to their lives. everyone just tries to go on like nothing ever happened. they forget. i wish i could. i got sent home from work […]
Hello, everyone.
I stumbled across this site the other day and have had the overwhelming urge to join. I guess it’s because I’m interested in suicide in a lot of ways – not just for myself but also the ethics of it in general. I know it’s a touchy subject, but I like reading various opinions on the matter. Personally, I think that we should have the right to do what we want to with our lives, whether we want to continue going on or not. I’m not trying to promote it, though. It’s just my view; I know it’s not the best thing for everyone.
I’m in […]
A few days i bought a whole lot of supplies for my exit & wrote on here that I would soon be leaving. For anyone following that post I am still here (obviously).
I decided to go and visit my mother for the night before I committed suicide. I was still convinced that now was the right time but during the night this really weird thing happened…..
I woke up during the night as i thought i heard my mum out in the hallway. I tried to sit up in bed and call out to my mum to ensure she was alright (she was […]
Today as I was leaving the grocery store, a complete stranger said “Goodbye, (*my name*)!”
I nodded politely, and nicely said goodbye, realizing I had absolutely no clue who this person was. I still don’t know.
One of the drawbacks to living in a tiny town in a mostly rural county is that almost everybody seems to know everybody else.
Some people might find this comforting and cheery; I find it unsettling and creepy.
One thing I relished during my brief stays in larger cities was that absolutely nobody had any clue who I was. I was a wonderfully anonymous face in amongst the equally-nameless hordes.
It was glorious.
Here […]
man, its been awhile. how is everyone today/night?? Its perfect weather out here: cloudy and raining.
I want to live in a world where I don’t have to talk, don’t have to explain, don’t have to figure out topics of conversation or be up-to-date on the latest bit of gossip at work or the latest media tidbit everybody’s talking about. I want to live in a world where I can do my own thing on my own time, for myself, and not worry about how strange it looks to any onlookers. I want to live in a world where professional sports, politics and religion don’t even have words to describe them. I want to live in a world where I don’t […]
I hope everyone is enjoying there evening a little song from seven lions especially the start of the drop at 2:16 the vibe I get from the drop keeps me happy hope it does same for you all.
i am trapped between suicide and survival. i want to die because i cannot live. but there are so many obstacles, and i am so tired… i don’t want to do anything substantial. i want to lay on the road and let someone else do all the work, but that would be incredibly selfish of me. (i know we’re not supposed to talk about methods, but that’s also a terrible method. don’t try it.) i want to fall asleep in the tub. sometimes i think about driving to the ocean and swimming until i can’t anymore, but i’m too afraid of the water. i feel […]
It just hit me why im here … I just want to be able to talk to people who can relate and not just be ignored .. Ive been thinking a lot lately of doing self harm but i never get enough guts to do it … I dont know if im depressed but i feel like i am… Its so hard to live a life where everyone you care about ignores you or simply breaks your heart .. I really want to talk to people and for once not be ignored?
what is life? A time voyage that only consists of people being alone, of people being forgotten, broken, left? I feel so alone and like theres no one there for me… I feel broken. Am i broken? Why does everyone leave my sight, my life ? Its like i put all this time into people and im the nicest person to everyone when they need something but right when you are broken they leave and tell you all these crazy shit. Do any of you guys just wonder what this life would be without you like if it would be better or not? Cause i […]
Plookamadooo.
I’ll be honest; that is the most absurd word I have ever come across. Of course only you would say such a thing, it wasn’t until I bumped into you over the bandwidth of the internet that I realised such things or words were even possible. You were full of surprises I s’pose, and it didn’t come as any such surprise that your life up until that point was one chapter short of a Pulitzer prize.
Heh…
…I remember quite vividly your imitation of that prank caller dude but with an Indian accent because *apparently* you sounded like an Indian. (Really?! I couldn’t get past that […]
Its the same old, same old really. I’m a pissed off misanthrope lacking more than a shy percentage of a will to live. I hate sounding like a melodramatic prick but honestly I can’t very well voice my mind without at least coming off to a few people that way. I try to stay honest, I try to stay logical and not let my inflated ego obstruct me…
But honestly… I’m just, ya know, tired. I’m sick of fighting only to look forward and see bigger and bigger battles. Its demoralizing. I’m 17, graduated highschool early, on to tech school to hopefully get a job with […]
does anyone else get the feeling when your walking everyone is judging you? that they are looking at you with eyes filled with sympathy. that you’ll never be good enough for them. or pretty enough? they feel sorry for your ass because they know that you’ll never be enough for anyone. and when you feel happy for a couple days and someone has to be a complete ***** and ruin it. yeah? because same.
Thanks to everyone here for listening to me opening up and encouraging me throughout my stay at S.P.! You have helped make my time in this world less miserable. Taking one last look through your kind comments on my posts so far… Why can’t everyone be like you guys?
Anyway… As the title says… This may be ”it”…
Wrote the letter, got the ”equipment” ready and all that other shit, heheh… Now I’m just waiting to get the motivation to do it, which will most likely come tomorrow when I’ll yet again be reminded how big of a failure I am. Whelp… Here goes nothing…
By the way, […]
So tonight I was bored and everyone on a forums I hang out on was logged of so I went down to our living room and sat with my parents; that was the mistake.
The result was my Dad being sexist and complaining and dissing people constantly, both parent complaining and looking down on me and my brother. They both started lecturing us and they never say anything good about anyone. My head ended up getting messed up and I started to panic so I left, trying to act casual. I felt so stuffed after that I ended up cutting myself and even more than usual, […]
I have things I want to do. I want to do so much. But I can’t. I have no money. No possible way to leave this place. I’m scared to talk to the one person I trust. I want to be loved. I want to be married. I want someone to like me enough to love me and to want to be with me the rest of my life. But that probably won’t happen. I need to leave this place. And I was going to try to move this year. But that won’t be possible. I don’t even have a fucking car. I’ve had so […]
I posted on here a while ago asking for help with therapy. I wanted to ask why do people feel the way they do when you tell the truth about how you feel. Yes everything that everyone is going threw is sad, but if you really want help with it you have to be honest and tell the truth right. But then when you tell the truth you get nothing but negative reactions or people just blow you off. I compleatly understend now why everyone never really tells people there true feelings. Well not to people like there families. One of the worst part about […]