Tag:

exist

That sound, that feeling.

by dismalfated 10/30/2015

written by dismalfated

Well-qualified and unwanted.

No one needs me to exist.

Why do I exist?

I let the days go by.

Sometimes I am hopeful.

Sometimes I give up.

The result is the same.

I let the days go by.

Until one of these days…

How is it going to end? I do not know.

When I reminisce,

And measure out my past,

I see that I am unwanted.

That no one needs me.

No one wants to need me.

I am avoidable and avoided.

I count the number of years,

How long this misery has resounded.

And the one clarity arises:

I do not want this to continue.

It is the most awful and sad sound.

10/30/2015 1 comment

It’s funny looking at my older posts. Such illusion yet such passion. I can now pretty clearly see the illusions I was in. Of course at that time I couldn’t see them, but that’s how life has always been with me – a game of hide-n-seek where the thing you’re looking for is right inside you. What amazes me is the passion with which I was seeking. I no longer suffer from the things I was so terribly suffering from then. But that passion is also gone.

This letting go thing is pretty heavy with me these days. I am recalling that conversation from Matrix when […]

10/30/2015 1 comment

Maybe I’m not alone.

by Silence HD 10/29/2015

written by Silence HD

-i need help. i don’t know if i want it. i don’t know if i’m ready for it. i don’t know the right way to get it. i just know i need it. i don’t know who i am. i don’t feel like a living person. my mind doesn’t exist inside my body now. i live in an illusion. i feel connected to the world, but i’m alone in a box with nobody else. my best friends don’t exist. they’re maybe out there somewhere but i haven’t met them. i won’t meet them. i’d give anything to meet them and have them in my life. […]

10/29/2015 1 comment

I need to go!

by MissDysphoria 10/25/2015

written by MissDysphoria

If you’ve ever watched Rick and Morty there’s an episode about these Meeseeks which are kind of like a genie. they exist long enough to complete their task, and once they have completed it they just POOF! However, in this episode they are faced with a task to hard to complete meaning they are existing longer than normal and its very painful for them. they want to complete it as soon as possible so that they can “poof” and stop existing. Well I feel like a Meeseeks, I have existed too long and just want to vanish. living hurts, I don’t feel like I was […]

10/25/2015 37 comments

Painted into a corner

by SiLlYrAbBit 10/13/2015

written by SiLlYrAbBit

Now what am i to do? Ive had depression and suffered for so long. i’m nearly 50 and w/o all hope. what am i to do? the best i can do is sleep as much as i can to just isolate b/c when i am around others i am always getting hurt. its a pathetic merry-go-round that i can get off of. i can even explain how i fee; and i certainly dont know what to do. sorry i have to exist. just sorry.

10/13/2015 2 comments

Why do we have to do all this? Why do we have to go through all the shit? Why does life even exist? There’s no point to anything and I want out.

by meg3323 9/21/2015

written by meg3323

9/21/2015 11 comments

Need help

by eamylime 9/16/2015

written by eamylime

i don’t know how to tell someone I need help. How can I tell someone I care about that I don’t want to exist anymore? How will they take me seriously

9/16/2015 4 comments

Im so alone

by disgusting 9/10/2015

written by disgusting

So I found a place to live, in an LGBT household and I know I’ll have support here but I feel so empty and painfully alone because I lost my best and closest friend in the sense that he truly doesn’t give a fuck how I feel, refuses to listen to how I feel and will cut me out of his life if I say how I feel, shits all over my feelings and acts like I don’t exist and we were never as close as we were and constantly pushes me away and trivialize my feelings and barely says anything to me […]

9/10/2015 4 comments

A total failure

by invisibleman 9/8/2015

written by invisibleman

I have a total failure life…
I dont get along well with anyone…

I was so different from all my family members since i was born…

I feel that no one understands how i feel…

I also have a failure marriage

A failure relationship life…

I lost all my dreams and goals…

I dont know how i can get myself happy and smile again…

I feel like every moment i m living in this world is a suffer…i can hardly breath…

I wish i have no exist in this world at all…

I m just a total failure…thats all…

9/8/2015 0 comment

It doesn’t matter..

by umbra17 9/5/2015

written by umbra17

I woke up today,lonely than ever and I realized it didn’t matter..
As I opened my eyes I realized that even my dreams are becoming a darker version of my obscured reality.
I’ve lost my purpose in this existence,as I’ve lost the need to care.
Sometimes when it gets too hard,like all the other pathetic living beings I seek for love, forgetting one essential fact,that love per se is a romantic version of people’s selfishness and I’m so tired from all this selfishness as I seek refuge paradoxically at myself.
The funny thing about myself,my only true friend,my only “true love”,my all is that it’s undeniably my […]

9/5/2015 35 comments

i lost my mind before I even had one

by munckin 8/29/2015

written by munckin

I will start with writing about my life and will start with sharing information about a period slighty before that I came to exist in this world. In this period of life my my father-to-be and mother-to-be were going through a rough period of their relationship and which was not stable and while most people with common sense would work on the relationship or choose to go seperateways I had a mother who had a very different plan and apparantly wanted to keep my father with her for reasons unknown to me and in order to achieve this she made a hole in the condom […]

8/29/2015 1 comment

Where Labels Go To Die

by ifuckedthequeen 8/22/2015

written by ifuckedthequeen

They die or metastasize in the soul. It all depends. We either foster these gender roles that are completely and utterly wrong and bullshit and hold to ideals that were past down from lesser ideologies. I think that goes for suicide as well. If someone really and truly wants to die then who is somebody to tell them otherwise. We may offer an alternate choice and our personal salvation but it is totally up to that soul to accept or reject and continue following their own path. We have such deep belief systems either rooted in religion or even the general societal attitude towards death […]

8/22/2015 4 comments

Most people hope there’s an afterlife

by donewithlife 8/11/2015

written by donewithlife

I hope there isn’t. After I die, whether it happens tomorrow or in 60 years, I don’t want to exist in any way, shape, or form.

8/11/2015 11 comments

I seek real online friends

by heartofazombie. 8/2/2015

written by heartofazombie.

Hi everyone,

I signed up today because it is time that I seek support. I’m going through a lot of pain because of my past and present, and it is not going in the right direction. That is very hard for me to admit. Every day is a fight. I’m trying to be strong and build a life for myself, but I feel very alone and the hope and motivation is fading. I used to make friends easily, but this past year took all life out of me, and I’m now too tired to go out and meet people. My family never calls anymore, and I […]

8/2/2015 24 comments

Goggles

by Bisban 7/27/2015

written by Bisban

A peasant from a thousands of years ago

I’m falling in a south-west

Somewhere, with fast speed internet

And then you’ll be, alright

I want to, maybe an Argonian

For so long ago

Shooting lighting and breathing fire

I’m so quick but doesn’t exist

Autumn is coming and farewell to you

7/27/2015 1 comment

Underwhelmed

by coconut 7/19/2015

written by coconut

I’m not suicidal, but I don’t want to live. If something naturally happened to end my life I would be relieved. I feel like my entire life has been one disappointment after the other. I feel like people shouldn’t have kids if they can’t look after them. I feel like my parents shouldn’t have had me, it was irresponsible. I feel like as a general rule, people are selfish, and through that I have been abused and irreparably damaged. I used to be so excited about things and life and was such a happy kid, but I’ve been through too much now. There is millions […]

7/19/2015 3 comments

The Race Between Suicide and A Cure

by PenroseKate 7/7/2015

written by PenroseKate

I’ve been suffering for a long time now. I spend 80% of the time I’m not at work locked away wishing the days would end and that I would never wake up.
I have a good life. Better than most probably. If I was to write a list of pros and cons the pros column would be at least five times longer.
BUT. It doesn’t seem to matter. Every stress and every pressure I feel so extremely. I struggle to shower and get out of bed of my days off, spending at least two days a week in my room. I cry when a stranger […]

7/7/2015 0 comment

Bored with Life

by cuky 7/6/2015

written by cuky

Not sure how to go back.
To the time and place of contentment.
Always looking forward to something.
Sanguine.
Fastforward. Decades pass.
Alone and disconnected.
Betrayed by God
Not having the common decency to exist.
Just as well. Turns out, he’s a dick.
Betrayed by life partner.
A wound that will never heal.
Powerless to trust or forgive.
The cyclops has no will to live.

7/6/2015 0 comment

Leaving tonight

by almp 6/19/2015

written by almp

I’m ending my life tonight. I don’t want to talk about my story or leave anything behind. I just want to go since there’s no hope of getting better. As an atheist I don’t want to cease to exist, but there’s no other option if I want to escape a lifetime of chronic pain. Despite the fear I have I’m also feeling relieved knowing that it’s almost over.

6/19/2015 2 comments

Its ok

by xm8lover 6/10/2015

written by xm8lover

I want you guys to know its ok to want to kill yourself and that its also ok if you want to not ‘give up’ (more like give in). I know there are many various spiritual beliefs so i won’t get into that but i want you to know that the only person who can judge you is you. The opinions of your family, friends, the state or ‘God’ don’t matter. You are what matters. If you feel like it is your time to leave Earth then leave, cleanly, without regret. For those worrying about hurting their loved ones. Imagine if you moved to some […]

6/10/2015 7 comments

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