No one Will ever love me. Why am I wasting my time living for nothing. Without love I have no reason to exist.
exist
It’s always the people that want to live that end up getting terminal cancer or hit by a bus or stranded in a house fire. Those of us that want to die, if we never commit suicide, we will be the ones living miserably into our late 90s. We’ll be the ones to outlive our friends, our spouses, even our children. It doesn’t make sense. We should get to have our misery cut short if we don’t want to live anymore. Cancer on demand… nobody would blame us for our deaths. Those that are happy and capable of dealing with this stupid world should live […]
I can’t go through this anymore, being lied to, betrayed, and hurt by.I’m tired of wanting to not be myself of hurting myself. I contemplate if I ceased to exist how long it would take anyone to notice, well if anyone ever did. When you are alone and don’t have anyone who truly loves you its hard. I can’t be strong anymore because I know its not worth it. No one actually wants to be with me for something other than their personal gain.
These past few days I’ve been so different. I’ve been getting really irritated. I can just snap easily. Whenever I’m like this I feel like I have no control and that the person I used to be is long gone. It feels like the voices took over and I’m long gone. It’s so hard to explain. I’m a totally different person.
The other night, as I laid in bed, I started saying some prayers and I started talking to mom and while I spoke I felt evil. I felt like I was gone. Like the girl that I used to be didn’t exist anymore. I don’t know […]
I found this place whilst looking for a website similar to those I’ve read about in books. You know, those shitty YA novels with suicidal teens who find their suicide partners on some website called ‘smooth passages’ or whatever. Do they really exist? This it the closest thing i’ve found.. and I’m not even sure why I’m here.
Lost everything, lost my heart, lost every interest. I wish I never exist.
If you ever loved me, my life would worth it. But you never did, yet I love you like everything, I love you with all my life.
If I was not 14 years old when I fell in love with you, it would less hurt.
I’m so unhappy. I feel there must be something wrong with me in that I don’t have any friends or relationships, I have no one to talk to and I’m desperately in love with a person who does not give a shit about me. I feel worthless and guilty all the time and it’s devouring me. I can’t accomplish anything without being moderately intoxicated. I hate myself and feel like I don’t deserve to be alive. I try to change my thinking and I can’t seem to stop it, but I want to feel better so badly. I just want to feel okay with myself but […]
”…1, 2, 3 1, 2, 3 drink
Throw ’em back, till I lose count
I’m gonna swing from the chandelier, from the chandelier.
I’m gonna live like tomorrow doesn’t exist
Like it doesn’t exist.
I’m gonna fly like a bird through the night, feel my tears as they dry.
I’m gonna swing from the chandelier, from the chandelier.
But I’m holding on for dear life, won’t look down won’t open my eyes.
Keep my glass full until morning light, ’cause I’m just holding on for tonight.
Help me, I’m holding on for dear life, won’t look down won’t open my eyes.
Keep my glass full until morning light, […]
I had to change the music, but it’s already all too late. If I were in it’s stability, it would be like writing a book status as I sit. I’ve already said every words. The dungeon that I am battling. But no-one will ever know. The destination . . . isn’t coming back. Attacked, from every which way . . . The name of a dark one makes his name and view down deeper and clearer. The ten-year cycle that my mom told me about, it isn’t over. The hardest thing, it exist now . . . But what is it. This night shall disappear, […]
I apologize for my rambling. It probably goes from rambling thought to another.
I don’t remember being happy or a least happy for long. Although, I remember when I fell in love with someone, I was very ecstatic. However as time moved one, this romantic interest I have with a friend I loved dearly proved to be unfruitful. It turns out, it was a pretty much a lie. I watched her flirt with me while she would officially have relationship another guy (a boyfriend). I was like her dirty desire she would talk to on the phone. We would plan non-existent dates and vacations. She’s married […]
I can’t stand this silence. Even when music is on, even when somebody is screaming. There’s so much silence. The world is silent. My world.
There’s nothing in it. Music doesn’t exist anymore.
I thought last night would be the end, but I still find myself here. I’m so tired of feeling this way but I can’t change it. I still love her every second of every day. Without her there is no point to life. It hurts to breathe knowing I will never see her again. At the same time I can’t get over her leaving me and treating me like I’m nonexistant. She erased me like our 5 1/2 years together didn’t even happen. Or mean anything at all. And her kids did the same. Yet despite all that, I still love them and long to […]
I’m a teenage drop out, nobody cares about me. I feel horrible and trapped and I’ve been here before, it gets better for awhile, but will always get worse. I’m sick of it, I just rather not exist.
My seasonal job will open soon, I’ll get my money for my method, and I will be good to go.
Evil comes in many forms, in abuse, emotional neglect, psychological torture and many others – all instigated by a minority of individuals – there are some people who are the embodiment of evil because they are the medium in which evil propagates. I have a strong inclination towards physical justice, I would gladly and genuinely inflict pain and suffering on those that have committed evil acts, ironic? I suppose on some levels, but I distinctly think that those that injure the innocent are subhuman and therefore are not allowed the benefits of human morality.
Coming in contact with these individuals breeds such vehement and unrelenting hatred in […]
I find it so difficult to exist, to be.
Am I the only one that feels existence is horrible? That to exist is too much. That the possibility of being trapped in eternity existing is so overwhelming that I can’t breath.
I can’t run away from existence, I am even petrified that when I kill myself I will still be trapped in existence. One is so powerless and out of control. Just trapped for all eternity if eternity exists. Unable to get away from being. Unable to not be. I wish it could all stop. I can stop. Just an end. Nothing more, nothing less. Just stop
“You’re a piece of shit. Put that gun to your head.” My thought processes throughout the day rarely changes.
(Disclaimer I’ve never had the ability to eloquently convey in words my thoughts and opinions. So I’m sorry if this doesn’t make sense, I tend to jump around a lot. I just need an outlet)
I might focus on work or whatever but like a background noise it’s consistently making it’s way ever present. The only reason I don’t kill myself is because of my family, I have the most incredible family in the world. Yet, I’m barely apart of it.
My siblings are all so close but […]
I’m just to tired to go on. I’ve been fighting depression for about 5 years now, and seen tons of shrinks and been on every kind of anti-depressant
there is…and nothing has worked. Hell has be to better than this. It’s hard being alone with these dark thoughts, but even harder to be around
people and have to fake it. I actually get angry now when I hear people say that there is help out there, bullshit! If I could even see a tiny tiny glimmer of light at the end of this tunnel, I might have some hope, but nothing but blackness for five long years […]
I sink into worlds of fantasy, faraway lands where I don’t even exist. Because in these stories the hero is never afflicted, never has any mental ailment, they just persevere and eventually they get the girl, defeat the villain and live happily ever after. This isn’t one of those stories. I’d never get the girl even if I tried. There is no happily ever after. And I’m the villain of this story. Sure you can fight yourself, you can even destroy yourself, but there is no scenario where I come out on top. No version of this where I win. Ultimately I will keep suffering, […]
I have a friend, that I consider as bestfriend. But I don’t think she thinks the same way. She’s such a popular person that everybody wanna be friend with her. We are teammates in soccer team. Yesterday she played awfully. I scolded her in front of other teammates. She cried because she played awfully, not because I scolded her. But the other teammates thought it’s because of me. Everybody thinks I am such a arrogant and bad person. She told me she didn’t cry because of me. But she never told the other teammates the reason she cried and she left me with that bad […]
I can’t do this by myself anymore……someone please help. Not literally, I know nobody can help, but I want someone or something to exist that can make my problems dissapear. Downward spiral of self destruction, drugs will destroy your soul.