This is my first post on this site so I am not used to this type of thing. Getting to the initial point, I was always the outcast in my home town, by both my family and in high school. Everyone else at school was happy and I never was able to make any friends through my 4 years. I told my family about this and they told me that it was me, I was called antisocial and a loser and all that. I believed them, I still do to this day. I don’t want to go into all the details of what went down […]
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Hi, i’ve never really posted on anywhere like this before but i don’t really know what else to do.
I’ve contemplated suicide so many times throughout my life and recently everyone feels like it’s finally coming to a climax, as if ive already accepted that i’m going to die soon, and i want to go out on my own terms.
I’ve been struggling with multiple health issues which make everyday life horrendous, i’m constantly spaced out and in pain almost every waking minute, it’s too much to take.
I’m also incredibly lonely, not even my family speaks to me unless it’s to start an argument or take out […]
I live a life that feels like a lie…. I smile and fake happiness because I feel like it is expected. My husband says “I don’t get it? Why are you always sad?” House, kids, job, family…. I should be happy right. What’s wrong with me that I live everyday wishing I had the guts to end it. To look at my “life” from the outside you would see a happy mother who always smiles, does activities with family, friends etc but it is all BS. I’m so tired. Tired of faking the smiles, tired of acting like everything […]
Irony right? I’m in this one. I’ve been here for the past 4 years, but naturally people won’t even notice me (different account i’m using now so you can’t find me). It’s like that even with real life support groups or other online ones I’ve been to. People just don’t care. I’ve been in one for 1 1/2 years and the other for 3 years. And whilst I’ve made many friends, they’ve stopped caring about me. They don’t even notice me anymore. When we’re alone, they either make an excuse and leave or just sit there awkwardly with headphones and work/read. I try to talk with them, […]
Just have to quickly rant about this. So I go through twitter for my job to find stuff to copy and tweet out for clients and I came across this bullshit story of how you can be a billionaire if you just work hard enough at it and want it bad enough. Of course it’s cis het white guy who got rich because he married rich. Yeah, that was his big break. He was born poor but he married a woman who’s family owned a big company. So he made something more out of that company. See, there’s the lie. You can work your ass […]
The sensation that deprive your mind of any kind of goal oriented thinking and at the same time produce a will for getting rid of itself. The way it is felt is immense and it takes over other feelings much like an orgasm. Although momentarily but lasts its mark on your body, soul or your heart. Whenever you get reminded of your pain, of any time, you immediately know what is the feeling and how you would feel if to endure that pain again….But pain unfortunately has a habit of being recurrent. Normally brain would push the pain of the past to the farthest corners […]
I think most people like to think themselves essentially good. They’ve made mistakes. Maybe seriously hurt others along the way. But deep down inside, they mean well.
Suppose you come to realize that what really motivates you is rotten – that it comes from a place of hatred, resentment, fear and selfishness. And as a result you do awful, unforgivable things. Acts that mean others would no longer see you as human, if they knew. What then?
I’m fairly sure that most would feel compelled to end their lives, if they found themselves acting as I have. But then most would never do such things in the first place. When you […]
and it is depressing the hell out of me.
the last few days it has been cloudy, chilly, and raining off and on. i actually really like fall, but i’m light sensitive, and a lack of it can make me more depressed & lethargic. no, i don’t own a light box and i can’t get one unfortunately.
i really want to enjoy this fall, but so far i can’t. i’m just really down. it’s coming up on the one-year anniversary of when my family broke apart, and i’m not taking it well. though it’s better having some distance between now and when it happened, and though that […]
I’m so fucking fed up with everything right now. My parents are driving me fucking crazy by being goddamn indecisive and they won’t tell me what the fuck is going on. Why do you have to play this stupid game?! Why can’t you tell me what’s going on? Why can’t you try to help me instead of putting such pointless weight on me that I can’t do anything about. Stop it. JUST STOP IT!
I’m fucking depressed enough. I’m already batshit crazy and this doesn’t fucking help. It doesn’t help that I don’t have anybody to talk to. It doesn’t help that all of this makes […]
Hello, I’m M22.
I think I was a good kid in childhood. Studied well, played sports etc. But I was always sad. I never really had friends when I was young. I lived out of city and there were no other people except for my family. I hated the woods and I always thought I missed a lot in my life. The loneliness stayed with me. Also my parent were (and still are) fighting each other, a lot of violence stays in memories. At one point I started to hate my family.
The first time I had suicidal thoughts I think I was 16 or 17. I don’t even […]
I’m really confused I’m not even sure why I’m depressed I wake up everyday feeling so sad I feel lonely all the time I feel like no one cares about me or how I feel I get anxiety and I tried killing myself with pills last week I cut and I want to smoke or drink to take the pain away some of my family members say I look thinner I’m always tired and I sleep a lot this week I’m eating more food than usual what is wrong with me can you guys help me out here I’m confused
I am, though. I can’t help it. I can’t help the fact that Im a failure. It’s not like I’ve not tried to put myself out there. I’ve done everything you wanted, Mom, Dad- I just… Nobody wants someone who’s nobody. And they don’t want any bullshit art that this shitty ass fucking 16 year old made. They don’t want dumbass masks I put my hard work into. They don’t even want my paintings! You tell me to put myself out there and then I’ll get people to buy my things. You tell me not to get a real job and just rely on art. […]
I know no one one is really listening, but I have no where else to go…………
Well I fucked up again, for the 3 millionth time. I posted something on facebook and I was in my head if you know what I mean. I said something about my family (well my moms side) and it was about money. I said ” november, but being nice enough anymore people are going to treat you like shit no matter what you do especially if you dont have a job even your brothes treat you like shit no matter what you do when it comes to people liking you […]
I’m still getting through my depression. It’s almost a daily battle here at college, but I’m surviving somehow. I heard this music one day with my therapist, and I couldn’t stop crying.
This song has kept me through some of the hard days. I play it when I fall asleep. I wake up better.
No matter how long ago something happened, it always find a way to cross your mind days, weeks, months or even years after it was passed.
Its been 6 and a half years since I was taken away from my mother, when my whole family and home life came crashing down on me. Today something managed to spark those memories without a second thought, and only now do I realise how much that impacted me. How different my life would be if it hadn’t crashed and burned all those years ago. I don’t believe my family realise how much that effected me and to this day […]
Thank you all so much. Even if we never commented towards each other, I have read all. I will make it. I have made it 30 years of depressed, I can make it a little longer for my family. I am chronically ill and will probably only make it another 20-30 years. I don’t want to come repeat life because I didn’t learn my lessons the first time. Or end up in some purgatory with guides and counselors. (i have been reading NDEs). Even if I just wink out, it is not fair to my daughter, she did not ask to be here either (as […]
it’s my birthday and I’m as sad as ever. I’m hiding from everyone, ignoring calls and texts. I don’t think my family even knows I’m home right now. 20 years and I have nothing to show for it. Being anything but sad an empty is a foreign feeling for me. I just want to hang myself tomorrow. I doubt I’ll go through with it but I want to. All I want to do is cry. but I’ve cried too much, and I can’t in front of my family. I don’t want to talk about it with them. there’s nothing they can do and they just […]
Im new to this forum. I recently found it and Ive been searching for something like this for a while. Im sad. Very sad. I mean, I see a few good days but overall Im sad. I dont want to be sad, no one does, but I dont know what to do anymore. I know that these past few weeks Ive been contemplating something I never thought Id want. Suicide. I always thought that would never be an option for me due to family things that Id rather not discuss here but It seems to be on my mind a lot.
Maybe I need a friend […]
love is just a word for some and a meaning for some…i feel that if their is no love there is no life…everyone needs love…some from family,some from friends,and some from their special one’s…at times you have all that love-family,friends,lover…but what if the family and friends betray you and the lover stands by your side???
In India…love is just a taboo…if a girl loves someone then she is said to be a characterless person…and if her parents doesn’t accept the guy she loves she has no rights to make her own choice to choose her life partner…
I mean why..??? God has given us […]