Still dealing with anxiety, schizophrenia, depression..I met someone. Who promised fight until I get better. Who promised to stay with me even on my worst days. It’s been 5 months and surprisingly he still with me.. but I’m scared of losing him. He’ll get tired of me, my breakdowns are because of him. Because I just think of the day he’ll leave me, I feel so stupid but I just can’t help it.. how am I supposed to deal with this without hurting him? It’s been hard for me. I think about him day and night, but, I also think about killing myself day and night. […]
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Plookamadooo.
I’ll be honest; that is the most absurd word I have ever come across. Of course only you would say such a thing, it wasn’t until I bumped into you over the bandwidth of the internet that I realised such things or words were even possible. You were full of surprises I s’pose, and it didn’t come as any such surprise that your life up until that point was one chapter short of a Pulitzer prize.
Heh…
…I remember quite vividly your imitation of that prank caller dude but with an Indian accent because *apparently* you sounded like an Indian. (Really?! I couldn’t get past that […]
Today I wanna talk about suicide. I don’t mean to offend anyone when I say this, but most of you are looking for the easy way out. Now I know you’re thinking ‘You think this is the easy way out?’ When really it is the easy way out. You don’t want to stay and fight through the pain like most of us have. You can’t handle the pain so you want to end it all. The point of this post is to tell you all that are contemplating suicide that you don’t have to end it and you’re not alone. Look at all these people […]
I have to end it now I cant stand breathing anymore. I’m going to make all my notes and from now on am going to spend my time making notes and looking for ways on how to end it. I’m sorry I just can’t fight anymore, I’m done….
Struggling to fight my morbid side, that’s what I call it. Still holding strong or so I hear. I feel like I’m flailing all the time. Barely in control but maybe that’s what I want to think.
Death comes slowly but surely. All I have to do is wait. Till then I’ll give it somewhere between 60 and 80 percent.
Take care all.
Woke up this morning with that knot in my stomach again. That basically means today’s gonna be utter crap. Been thinking more and more about my end of life, starting to become a more attractive option. Part of me wants to just sleep and not have to wake up again, and another part wants to try and fight these feelings. The latter part is fading more and more each day.
Hello my fellow survivors of deepression 🙂
If you were a superhero, or super sexy not so villain villain, who’s one purpose was to combat suicide and depression
What would be your super power and how would you use it?
Interpret this according to your current mood. I think it fits quite well whether you’re ready to give up or want to fight on. I believe the speech is from the film ‘Network’.
i find some days my desire to fight for life is almost nonexistent. Like today, I really just want it to be over. I know I have to now because I feel like it’s to close to the holidays. It’s like I’m committed till at least the first of the year now. 🙁 I just really hate everything
Keep fighting the good fight and never give up hope everyone. You are all loved and such amazing human beings. 🙂
Lately I’ve been depressed, three weeks ago me and my girlfriend broke up. We’ve been together for about 2 years, in August my mother passed away, and well she kind filled with hope and happiness, and lately I lost all fo that hope, the joy and happiness, I turned to drugs, I’ve been in bed, not motivated to goto school, to ashamed of myself. I know what I’ve done wrong, Me and her had a pretty heated fight, and I said she didn’t care what I was going through, cause she didn’t really acted like it, that’s hwo our breakup started, the next day we […]
I’ve been here before.
Broken, alone, my heart so sore.
The sadness runs deep
My hill to steep.
My dreams a rumbling nightmare.
And All I can wonder is,
Why should I care.
I’m not in despair.
I just can’t figure out,
If this is fair.
They claim they’re is karma.
The good and the bad.
I should be glad.
You know?
I’ve done many good deeds.
And I should be freed.
Yet, here I am
Sitting in the dark.
Waiting for just a little spark.
A spark of good in life.
Can’t I give up?
This losing fight.
I’m tired of waiting for my light.
I want to sleep.
My last words to be goodnight.
But then I’d be a disappointment.
Like they all claim me to be.
I’m living in […]
Scream into the night
Scream for the right
Scream for those who cannot
Scream for those who fought
Scream for those without sight
Scream, for there is no light
Scream for those who hurt
Scream for those beneath the dirt
Scream for those who lied
Scream for those who cried
Scream for those whose tears run red
Scream for those that wish they were dead
Scream for the terror
Scream for the horror
Scream for the might
Scream, for you have lost the fight
We fall
In the good and bad
From the second story or love
A Saturday doesn’t get much better than this
I found a reason
I found a reason to bleed
Forget the stories that they read to you
And don’t you worry about anything
Forget the stories that they read to you
I have a feel that everything will
Be just fine
Forget the stories that they read to you
Everything will be just fine
Forget the stories that they read to you
Tear out the pages and we can write our own book
Divided in two
The needle and you
We can write […]
Today has been one of the most emotional day of my life. I have never felt so useless..and alone. I realize everybody comes in my life when they need something. I want to die. I want to die. I already feel mental pain. Physical pain is what i need. Something to say you’re in control…stop…go…deeper. I HATE MY LIFE. There’s nothing that make me want to fight to live. I’m sorry.
hey guys i havent posted in a while i thought i was getting my depression under control but this morning it hit me again like a ton of bricks if anyone remembers a while ago i posted a long post and in it i chose a date to hold off until to see if i was feeling better and i was for a month or so but now im not so sure im starting to think all the recent changes in my life just kept my mind to busy to focus on the pain but now that im settling back into a routine my fucked […]
you know that feeling you get when youre falling asleep, when your limbs are dead and heavy, well that’s me all the time. I couldn’t even get the milk out of the fridge. I’m so desperate inside, like I’m scrambling through all of this heavy darkness inside of me, I cant breathe. my heart is palpitating. I feel physically sick. and keep zoning out for 10 minutes every now and then and have no idea whats going on. councelling is shit, they even said they don’t know how to help. I just don’t know what I need. I cant. I want to, but I mentally […]
Unlike the human race who keeps trying to stay alive, I try to die every day. I’ve become so close, I have no fear of anything anymore. I cut more more each day, and take more xanax each day and if I bled to death or did not wake up it would be ok, I’m just not afraid anymore. That’s how I know that I’m finally at the End. Each day to stay alive is a new struggle and I’m tired of this fight, I don’t even want fight anymore so I’m thinking today is the day. Anna
I gradually begin to understand that love is beyond time and age. No matter how old the person we love becomes, we still fight for their happiness and see everyday with them as a gift to cherish. And there is happiness that comes along with every single day that passes.
There is a lot more to love I am yet to learn. And with you, I am learning, step by step, every single day.
This world has gone to shit
large cracks emerge breaking apart cities and towns
spewing fire from the very depths of hell
there is no stopping the chaos it brings forth
cities burn, families die
he is merciless and will not stop
pain everlasting, brings nothing but sorrow
merciless combat breaks out between the ones
with the strength and the will to survive
friends turned to foes
as they fight to survive
he sits on his throne
laughing maniacally (laughing)
but in the end, he will kill them all anyway
entrapped in psychosis, is this a dreamworld?
ENTRAPPED IN PSYCHOSIS, IS THIS A DREAMWORLD?
WHAT THE […]