Tag:

home

Confusion

by KH 6/8/2015

written by KH

Hello,

So today was a pretty bad day for me. I got sent home from school because I couldn’t stop crying. Well, I told them the reason was because of a bad headache, but in reality I just couldn’t find the strength to get through the day. The thought of walking around and talking to people who I know don’t like me, the thought of simply being somewhere I don’t belong scared me. So I cried. I continued to do so until I got home where I finally slept. But my dreams were simply filled with horrific scenarios which I dare not repeat for thought of […]

6/8/2015 6 comments

tired of feeling lost, tired of letting go..

by alina_01 6/7/2015

written by alina_01

Man can life be depressing or what? Sometimes I sit here and wonder how the fuck I managed to let myself live this long. I honestly don’t know why I continue moving forward when there is nothing better in store for my future. I feel like I’m on auto pilot or something because I just keep going. I don’t wanna say I’m numb because I do feel things. It’s just when I get disappointed or sad I instantly shake it off and I feel like it’s irrelevant. I haven’t gone out because I was trying to finish paying tuition which I haven’t been able to […]

6/7/2015 2 comments

Why I Wish I Was Dead

by Bounce99 6/4/2015

written by Bounce99

Most mornings I wake up wishing I died in my sleep. Why? Because this life sucks. I weigh over 300 pounds, I have never had a relationship, I have a grand total of 4 friends that I have known for over 15 years. I had no family except my mother and stepfather who are always nagging me to get help for my depression. Who wouldn’t be depressed if they had my life? I get up, I go to work, I come home, take a shit, eat, jerk off, sleep. Repeat. I was happier when I was getting high and banging hookers all the time. Now […]

6/4/2015 0 comment

against her

by silvermoon 6/4/2015

written by silvermoon

As soon as I leave my place the world is against me. I can’t take it anymore. Stigma of mental illness and suffering. I am still six years old and highly sensitive. I long for a family and someone to care, who is there anymore. What is the best way to go home, I ask myself.

I’ve got to find a way to be ok, and I cannot.

6/4/2015 0 comment

First Social Outing

by rich51bruhh 6/3/2015

written by rich51bruhh

So I went to my first party, a friends party, after a long time of not going anywhere, socially that is. As I am at the party I meet two new people and they end up inviting me to a party they are having soon. After all of this I come home and look at my phone feeling like shit. Like, I had a wonderful time and now I just come home like, “Time to take off that mask!” I don’t know what it is keeping me from enjoying myself but I will force myself to that party, and I will fucking enjoy myself!

6/3/2015 1 comment

New here. Could use people to talk to.

by NWren 6/2/2015

written by NWren

I’ve been dealing with suicidal tendencies since I was in high school. TEN YEARS AGO

Obviously it hasn’t been continuous over those years. There have been days where keeping it a secret is easy and my “happy face” feels normal.

But these thoughts have been VERY strong over the past month of so.

I HATE my job. The people I serve (I work in food service) are RUDE. I’ve been laughed at, sworn at, and just generally treated badly. I serve the same people every day so I’m constantly dealing with it.

I am so unhappy in my apartment. I rent a room and have no say in who […]

6/2/2015 5 comments

….

by bubbles1128 6/1/2015

written by bubbles1128

…

If her tears fall with no one around

Would you still be able to see it?

Somedays are hard

Others are harder

Choices are made that change her world

They can never be replaced

The love she had now fades to grey

As the passion she holds smolders to ash

All she can do is wallow and cry but,

If her tears fall with no one around

Would you still be able to see it?

The bitterness of life is unbearable

The pain that continues is crippling

She wonders if it ever subsides

The answer turns to no And everything continues

They go about their day knowing they are loved

She goes home […]

6/1/2015 1 comment

Exiled

by dead 5/31/2015

written by dead

I don’t know what I’ve done to be exiled by all of my friends. I’ve been home a week. I haven’t been home in my house over 24 hours straight in a few years, I’m always out doing stuff with them. This is the third time this has happened in the last 10 fucking days I’ve been home. My best friend straight up ditches me day after day and then tries to blame it on me, making up stupid validations or excuses, and somehow I’m the one at fault. My other friend begs me to hang out with her because she’s bored, yet never calls me […]

5/31/2015 13 comments

my parents left on a trip and I feel like it’s my time to leave this world

by treefrog 5/30/2015

written by treefrog

I’ve never felt so alone in my whole life. I struggle with mental illnesses, one being chronic suicidal ideation. I’ve lost everyone, no one understands me. My parents told me to do it, just not in their house. So I’ve found a place where I won’t disrespect my parents or their home. Just one problem. I have two beautiful, loving, loyal cats who have saved my life on multiple occasions. I don’t know if they’ll ever find a home with someone who loves them more than me. I’m not saying that cuz I think I’m anything special, but they are my very best friends. I […]

5/30/2015 4 comments

why I want to die.

by I should die 5/28/2015

written by I should die

ever since primary school I had been cutting. I dud it because all my ‘friends’ were horrible. One day they were all friendly the next day they would be holding me down and throwing footballs at me. Bow I’m in secondary school. And it just got worse. I was alone again. Then people started commenting on my appearance. I began starving myself to make ne skinnier than I am. I gate being ugly I hate it. One day I decided I was gonna do it. I had enough. But then this boy stayed up all night trying to stop me. He was the kindest person […]

5/28/2015 1 comment

lie

by silvermoon 5/28/2015

written by silvermoon

it is very tiring to feel like the only one, to blame yourself for everything, to see choices that you made that are set in stone in a cruel world. it is very tiring to now have physical symptoms due to stress and feel it is your fault, it is very tiring to be alone and constantly struggling to get around seen by no one in this cruel ass world

ptsd and sexual abuse and no family and loneliness and self-blame and no way to get around and no one who truly cares is a recipe for going home

god doesnt care either b/c god has never […]

5/28/2015 3 comments

Too Young To Feel This Way

by Terrible 5/27/2015

written by Terrible

At the age of 14, in my first year of highschool, I tried to take my life. I hid under a bridge, without anyone knowing in the morning on October 27th, and I swallowed 60+ pills. The pills were pills that I was prescribed to from my doctor. Before all this, I was clinically diagnosed with depression and anxiety, I had thought that I would get better, but seemingly, I did not. So, that morning, I took pills, and waited. My legs were numb, and I was freezing cold. My whole body was slowly shutting down, and I could feel every little part of it […]

5/27/2015 2 comments

Am I Actually Here ?

by lexi1112 5/26/2015

written by lexi1112

I sit at home alone everyday .. When my sister gets home she bombards me with nasty comments about how I do nothing with my life and I sit on my fat ass all day .. Sometimes she calls me a depressed annoyance and how one day shes gonna slap me.. Maybe I should just kill myself . its not like they are gonna miss me. My mom constantly yells about how the dirty dishes need to be done while I’m thinking about how I should kill mysf tonight . I’m tired all the time… I have no friends. . is it true that it […]

5/26/2015 2 comments

I’m gonna die tomorrow.

by alonelybird 5/25/2015

written by alonelybird

Hey (goodbye).
I’m kinda messed up right now, I’m feeling pretty bad though I could probably stop feeling this way; I just don’t want to. I’m not sure why but I kind of enjoy feeling sad, I guess in the same way that I like self-harm; maybe it’s the same thing. This probably isn’t healthy but I’m not, so it might be alright. I guess I’m just fucked, I hate myself and I think I might kill myself tomorrow not that it matters.
I’ll go to the student services room at school, sign off there, catch the train home and hang myself.
I’m sure it […]

5/25/2015 22 comments

Dreams

by JustSomeFool 5/22/2015

written by JustSomeFool

I was always alone as a kid. I never knew my dad (I’m pretty sure I was artificially inseminated), my sisters ran away from home, and my mom worked two jobs and vented her frustrations on me. I never really knew how to have friends, but I always tried to talk to other kids. It never worked.

I saw people who had “best friends” and big brother, and I wanted those things so badly. I’d go home and just imagine what he’d be like: strong, smart, funny, and like all the music and video games that I did.

When I was turning 17, a mere 10 days […]

5/22/2015 3 comments

by Alonelyfool 5/21/2015

written by Alonelyfool

It’s funny how I ask to be normal. I wanna do normal shxt.

Like I wanna have a normal day. Get out of bed, shower, eat, go to work, come home and go to sleep. I can’t even do this.

My day is more like wake up crying [cause I wish I were dead] cry in the shower and don’t wanna eat. Call in because I’m too sad to work or go to work and cry. Then have insomnia all night.

Ppl take for granted the ability to have a simple day.

5/21/2015 3 comments

It’s hard to deal with this as a Christian. I feel so guilty…

by SilentScream 5/21/2015

written by SilentScream

I know I’m supposed to forgive, or else I won’t be forgiven. I know I’m supposed to pray for those who hurt me, but it’s not always easy. I’m having flashbacks of things my parents said to my brother and I

No one will ever want you
When you move out, don’t come back
You’re trash
You’ll never be anything
You’re a motherfucking piece of shit, you know that?

And did

locking him in a closet
making him sit outside for hours as they kept the door locked
“Spanking” us until they saw blood

And more. I don’t want this to affect the rest of life, I want to forget, but I can’t . I […]

5/21/2015 11 comments

Without Purpose

by dead 5/20/2015

written by dead

nothing is worth it anymore. I fuck up in innumerable ways without even trying. Turning to alcohol just makes it worse, causing even bigger failures. I never thought my life would turn out like this. Yes, I am smart, I have a future, how could I be so selfish, I have everything handed to me. I’m a wreck of human, inadequate at life, I have no purpose, no reason. I have messed up nearly everything and don’t want to wake up to face my consequences of anything. I’m reckless, and very soon I won’t be here any longer, unless the cats I work with this […]

5/20/2015 2 comments

Anchor

by Sammi6xoxo 5/19/2015

written by Sammi6xoxo

I try so hard
But you never go away
I try so hard
To forget your face
Your smile was brilliant
It lit up the room
Your body resilient
To the deepest wounds
Skin like silk
Hanging from ivory bone
Holding you still
As you suffered alone
So strong and so quiet
Your heart was my home
But the beating grew silent
And so did the phone

I should have begged you not to go
I shouldn’t have tried to let you go
Now I’m broken and so alone
Incapable of loving another soul

Heartbreak I can handle
But this is much more
You were my anchor

5/19/2015 1 comment

Exciting new things

by jennjenn 5/19/2015

written by jennjenn

Maybe I should just give it one more shot. My last time I was successful, well a combo of drugs and the lq withdrawls, either way, it did work, so it’s my time.

The other day some dude was talking about jumping, he had rented a room. I am super afraid of heights, but I hate wasting money, so I would just HAVE TO JUMP. Vodka will give me courage, unless it makes me sick, or worse I just fall asleep. I have the money right now to get a room and alcohol. I pray, many times a day, I pray for others and that I’m […]

5/19/2015 4 comments

Newer Posts

Older Posts