my littel joke has always been i tick the remember me box when i sine in cos that way at least some one will its a sham that its becomeing more and more true iv just come back from a larp event a place were NO ONE GIVES A SHIT WHO YOU ARE OR WHATS WRONG WITH YOU AS LONG AS YOUR UP FOR FIGHTING RP AND DRINKING AS LONG AS YOUR A NERD OR A GEEK AND AS LONG AS YOUR NOT A DICK UP FOR A LAUGH AT EVREY AVALABUL TIME YOU ARE COOL non of them give a shit about my spelling or […]
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pues no se porque estoy escribiendo esto. casi cinco anos de depresion y todavia tengo sentimientos oscuros. ya tengo experiencia con “therapy” y mas de dos meses en un hospital…pero nunca de esa me ayudara. pienso que nunca va a ayudarme y es dificil despertar en la manana sabiendo que esta es mi vida ahora.
I don’t know why im writing this. nearly 5 years of depression and still i have dark feelings. ive already had experience with therapy and more than 2 months in a hospital…but none of this helped me. I think that nothing is going to help me and its hard to […]
So im a little afraid of dying which ive told myself is normal so im okay with that.What i cant figure out is why unlike other times i dont feel sad but i do feel suicidal.It bugs me cause i dont feel much of anything when it comes to emotions other than that fear of not knowing whats after this.Im still going through with it but it would be easier if i was feeling some depression along with it or some anger.Maybe i am empty inside i just dont know.My sisters leaving and i may hurt others if i dont stop my life.Im doing it […]
i dont know how to start this off but i dont know anymore, it feels like my life is falling apart and i cant do anything about it, even though its only summer, im happy about school because im gonna really try super hard this time, in grade 9 i passed most of my classes with 51s
fuck
and i didnt even pass math in summer school but thats not whats making me feel bad, its about the fact that i have no friends anymore and we used to be really close and im sure all of my internet friends hate me too
they shut me out, do you […]
I’v been suicidal for 5 years. I started to self harm in 7th grade. I was bullied a lot and figued no one cared. My friend saw my arm… she didnt lecture me or tell me to stop or ask why. She simply walked away and we never spoke again. Iv had no one to talk to for 5 years. My mom hates me. She knows nothing about me. Her main goal in life is to get high with her boyfriend, but anyways im in my junior year of high school. Everyone look at me funny, i mean it was fine until it got worse. […]
Should i make a youtube channel
about my bi problem or nahh
oh and im starting to take a interest in making
songs and playing piano but the problem
is that a piano cost a lot and i cant sing
what you think?
I was really hoping to just slip away in my sleep last night but, like most things in my life, im just not that lucky. It used to be nights were the toughest for me. For some reason now, its mornings. I hate waking up with no one around. I hate the fact that I cant see my girls faces before leaving for work. They are always the first thing on my mind. I wake up in tears missing them. Why cant I just escape.
I am 21 years old. About to drop off college. Lives with a depressed mother. Jobless. Everyone i know really doesn’t care except for my mother. I really don’t know what to do anymore. I can imagine my friends doing fine without me. Maybe getting out of their lives is just what they need to see their own lives and silver linings. I feel like disease and i want to shut myself from the world. I lied about everything. Its my 6th year in college trying to finish up a two year course and i hate it so bad that i feel like im […]
my life is crap. it will always be. i have bipolar disorder. i will always have it. why should i keep going? im not even sad right now, im just being honest. I have two people who im living for, my gf and my son. I cant provide for them because of my issues right now, plus horrible economy. im poor, and black. i have health problems. i couldnt find love if my gf left me, which she might. I have 1 other friend. I live with my folks, and my family is sick just like me. Im thinking of killing myself, and writing a […]
so im socially awkward and im losing friends left and right,, im probly gonna die in a few months when i save up for a gun ..i lods my girlfriend of three years had to move out of her place (now shes a heroine addict) i was recently told by a pscycologist from my town that i fit the symtoms of adhd innattentive…which makes so much sense but im 24 now i feel like my life is ruined..i cant pay attention in conversation so now i avoid everyone…im afraid the doctor will think that im just out for drugs to sell..this is my last shot […]
I havent drank in a while because it usually ends up very badly for me but tonight, im really needing to just zone out. As I was pulling into my driveway coming back from the liquor store, I saw a wallet in the street. It had a decent amount of cash, some gift cards etc. I could have taken it all and just tossed the wallet in the garbage but, knowing it was the right thing to do, I took it over to the guys house and gave it to him. He was very grateful as most people would be but, unlike how I used […]
I need to sort myself out. I cant keep feeling like this… I just feel so irritable every second of the day. I have tears permanently in my eyes, just sitting here doing nothing angers me. But then I have no choice- weather is crap, friends are busy and I honestly dont want to talk to them. I always feel I have to make the effort with all of them, To be happy because if im not it means either being called miserable or having to explain myself when even I dont know whats happening.
Im so passive.
I just want to go back to college. […]
I don’t want to cut anymore I don’t want to smoke But what reason do I need to stop for? You wanted me to change and I did I became a whole new person just so you would be proud of me and where did that get me? It got me nowhere your still not proud, I don’t want to be a mini Jasmine or Laura Jr. I want to be Mya and Mya wants to dance, sing, run away with her guitar and write music. I was happy in Oregon I had a bunch of friends and almost had a boyfriend But you dated […]
well, mhh, lets get this started, im 22 yo male and i have been trought depresion since i was 15 yeah this have been very hard 7 years, im not goig to give details about that because if you are here you may know how i feel rigth now, the fact is that im a transgender, so yes im kind of a girl in the body of a boy and i have knew since i was 12 that is like the age when you can ge treatment and stuff to “solve” that trouble so rigth now im in a dead end i can either become […]
Im just done. I cannot take this anymore. I can no longer handle being shoved around or not having anyone there for me. Its just to overwhelming, to stressful, to depressing. I feel so alone. Nothing matters. Numbness is my bestfriend. Im just not enough to hold up all this weight. No one would see this coming. I never showed a sign of hurt when they called me those names. Saying i looked aneroxic and that no one likes me. Really they just pushed it and hid it furthet and further deep down inside of me. But one human being can only take so much. […]
hi i guess , im new here , i guess im will tell you my story , sorry if this gets boring. im here because i needed something to let out everything thats bottled up in side of me . i dont have a sad story and people may think that why do i do this because i havent gone through enough , i havent been bullied or abused or any strong like that. ive been self harming for about 1 and a half years , the reason is because im in love , i cant have him , he is my best friend , […]
Like everyone here, im on the ragged edge. I watched a kitten last week for my (gf/ex/dont know where were at anymore) while she was on vacation with her family. Immediately I bonded with that little kitty and it actually helped me to feel a little bit better about things. Just having that companion to come home to. Knowing she was waiting for me. Her chasing me around the house attacking my leg. So I told my mom and sister about it and asked them to keep an eye out for one for me thinking maybe it will help. Today, after work, my sister told […]
You know its been a long time since I last smiled.I’m not talking about a casual smile…I’m talking about a real smile, a smile that actually means something.sure when I watch comedies I sometimes laugh, and that intern produces a smile.but these days my laughs and smiles feel more forced than anything.it gets tiring having to put on this mask of mine.its hard and it only serves to make me feel much more alone than I already am.im tired.I would love to sleep.I wish I could just go to bed and never wake up.i wish that I could dream a good dream and never wake […]
Why is everyone so obsessed with this world? As in this existence with earth and the solar system and our god?
Part of the reason I’ve felt alone for so long is because I never really felt like I was in the right place. I’ve always had a feeling like im not suppose to be in this world.I just never really belonged. im positive there are other worlds out there worlds with diferent planets and creatures and different gods.wanna know what my deathwish is?. When I die I would like for my soul to be taken to a completely different world…a different existence.I guess I […]