Tag:

life

Back again…

by KH 7/6/2015

written by KH

I doubt I posted often enough previously for anyone to have taken notice that I haven’t posted anything for some time now… The simple explanation is that I did not feel the need to. Every negative feeling for some reason subsided for a while, I was happy-ish. My boyfriend and I were getting along well, I finally managed to fit in amongst decent people.. Then I got admitted to hospital.

For physical reasons only was I admitted for three weeks, which took its toll I suppose. I was discharged a few days ago and honestly I’ve never felt worse. My boyfriend has decided once again to […]

7/6/2015 2 comments

Harrison’s suicidal brother: Melvin Bergeron

by Salt 7/6/2015

written by Salt

“That must’ve been a doozy,” said Mrs. Bergeron to her son Melvin. “I think your ears are bleeding a little.”

Of course Melvin couldn’t hear her until the ringing subsided, but he could see that she was doing her best to show compassion.

“I’m ok, Ma. Gosh, that was a doozy.”

“That’s what I said,” she repeated. “Must’ve been a doozy.”

“What must’ve been?”

“I can’t remember,” she answered, shrugging as she had done so many times before. Being precisely at the National average level of intelligence, she didn’t need to wear a Brain Handicapper like her slightly-above-average-intelligence sons. So she could only guess what the loud disruptions sounded like–that […]

7/6/2015 9 comments

That Quiet Night

by marine105 7/5/2015

written by marine105

The leaves blow gentle through that quiet night,

ever buffeted by the interminable winds,

tossing them back and forth.

Cessation never comes, nor therefore reprieve,

those veined, paper-thin sheets of matter

those had been once unified in life, now dying in separation

bare no word or action to tell of their torment

for true silence is their only comfort,

and, upon destruction, their only reward.

They live, they die.

And, somewhere in between, they suffer.

7/5/2015 0 comment

I just want the pain of life to cease

by unlovedbyme 7/5/2015

written by unlovedbyme

I have attempted suicide several times. Obviously, they failed. I don’t want to fail again.

I have tried everything thing under the sun to get to a point of being ok with myself and my place in this world. I have had fleeting moments of okay-ness, but only fleeting as I always come back to wanting to die.

I don’t trust anyone outside of a few family members who partially understand what I am feeling and give me the same advice of “pull up your bootstraps,” bullshit. I know they love me and don’t want me to suffer and I appreciate that. The thing is, I honestly […]

7/5/2015 1 comment

Hey look at him

by Rotted_Flesh 7/5/2015

written by Rotted_Flesh

“he has a big nose, his eyes are too far apart, he looks weird, his hair is fucked, he’s too fat, he’s too short, he’s not muscular enough, he’s not cool enough, he doesn’t have a good enough job, he has a shitty car, he has a shitty apartment, he doesn’t have enough friends, he doesn’t have enough hobbies, god his life must suck.”

– The Human Race

7/5/2015 3 comments

Feeling nothing

by plasticflower 7/5/2015

written by plasticflower

“I’m afraid of dying” was something that I used to think and say a lot, but I have forgotten how it feels to be afraid and not ready to die.
For about 5 years, I’ve felt constantly sad. Can’t say I’m depressed since I’ve never been diagnosed, but I can say that feeling hopeless is now my “normal” feeling.
So I wonder, what is the normal “normal” feeling? It’s obviously not hopelessness, so what is it? I wish to love life again. Either that or just not live. It’s not like I’m actually living, anyways.

-V

7/5/2015 3 comments

Mystery Illness

by ciz 7/3/2015

written by ciz

I was happy before the pain began. I was a better person.

Going on three years now of a mystery illness that’s drained me of who I am. Been to several doctors this past year, took a whole year off from college and still no answers. I have just continued to feel worse and worse. I have lost all functionality as a human being. My family now expects me to get a job because at 22 I can’t be taken care of forever but I can’t work.

I don’t want to kill myself because of a lack of caring on anyone’s part. My family has helped me […]

7/3/2015 6 comments

The truth is….

by cheomah 7/3/2015

written by cheomah

Im scared. Im so scared of death but at the same time I want, I need to die. Theres no purpose for me in life. My grades are droping in school, cant sleep or concentrate on anything. IM nothing more then a ghost, 3/4 dead and im scared im gonna break( if I haven’t already.) and then ill be gone, 6 ft under. I most likely wont even make it to 16, I wont have a husband or have kids. why? Because im a goddamn coward. It would be so easy to just give up, no more pain, or depression…

7/3/2015 1 comment

Be strong

by MisaNeko 7/3/2015

written by MisaNeko

11211827_1167561703269975_370966189_o

Sometimes my life gets so fucked up but i learn from those fucked up times. I thought i couldn’t handle it and i even tried to cut my self, but by the end i realized that i’m just being weak and coward and trying to get away from my problems. I’m so glad that i encounter those problems because if i didn’t i will be still weak and coward.

I know that my problems before is not that big compare to the other people, and i know […]

7/3/2015 2 comments

always alone

by gingercat 7/2/2015

written by gingercat

I have been depressed or feeling unloved since I was 5. I am 57. I am alone. Never been first in anyone’s life. Let me be honest, I am not anything in anyone’s life. I am seriously damaged. I have never belonged. Never been loved. No one even wants my love with no strings. I can’t even make one friend on the internet. I am a loser. I have screwed up everything I touch. I hurt constantly. Told to be myself and when I am. They leave in a day or two. My sister hasn’t talked to me in 23 years. Other kin don’t care […]

7/2/2015 2 comments

Existential Crisis

by alonelybird 7/2/2015

written by alonelybird

My psychologist says I’m having an existential crisis and have been my whole life pretty much. It’s strange coz I just laughed when she told me, I am numb; it wasn’t funny. I don’t care about my family anymore, I don’t care how my suicide would affect them; I just wanna die.
“Cow” by Sparklehorse, I’ve been cutting to this song for three years so it’s quite sad and trigger-ey for me. I remember this one time I was cutting, I accidently stabbed myself and it went about 4cm in. I find it funny that I can mess myself so bad and no one ever […]

7/2/2015 0 comment

New month

by Rotted_Flesh 7/2/2015

written by Rotted_Flesh

New start for me, just finished off the rest of my booze and starting my medication therapy of Effexor tomorrow!!! I know I made a previous thread about this topic but I just wanted to say a few more words. I really hope I succeed this time and don’t relapse and that I react well to the Effexor. Big life changes comin’ up for me, now if I could just have that much needed confidence to face the world without fear I’ll be set. Always a work in progress I suppose. Fuck even my own optimism is annoying me lmao, sorry folks.

7/2/2015 1 comment

The Internet is My Only Friend

by NotAFan 7/1/2015

written by NotAFan

Why am I always on the computer?

Why do I never do anything else in real life?

I don’t have any friends in real life, MOM. I don’t see anyone in real life who has anything in common with me. What’s that? You think I won’t learn any social skills from online school? I’ve learned more social skills online than I have in real life. I have friends online who care about me. I only feel normal online because I’m one of many there, whereas, in real life, I’m all on my own.

I haven’t met anyone who’s transgender. I haven’t met anyone with autism. I don’t see […]

7/1/2015 2 comments

This is it?

by HerBreathingMoments 7/1/2015

written by HerBreathingMoments

This is it?

This is life?

7/1/2015 3 comments

Anti-suicide?

by chaoss 6/30/2015

written by chaoss

This is just a general question mostly because i can not find an answer anywhere and I though I could get some incite here. Is there a term for or does anyone know what someone would be called or category they would fall into if they had depressive and suicidal thoughts but did not believe in taking their own life?

6/30/2015 4 comments

Targeted for life

by cursed in secret 6/30/2015

written by cursed in secret

I have been gang stalked since before I can remember. A corrupt judge signed off on my parents custody agreement moving me from my dads to my moms. I should have been put in foster care and because I wasn’t I have suffered the long term side effects of relentless victimization. It’s been said that no one can survive a constant negative environment. I have but I wonder how much longer I can bounce back without loosing what little I have left. My life was stolen from me and our government took it with no remorse. I wish I knew who I was before I […]

6/30/2015 1 comment

I’m not sure

by xo.belle 6/29/2015

written by xo.belle

I don’t know whether or not I feel like things are worth it. Maybe some things and people are worth living for but what about the rest, what about the things you never asked for. I get that life throws you obstacles to get passed and learn a lesson from but I don’t want this anymore. I don’t want to live with myself, my thoughts, my actions or things I don’t do for myself. I can’t live with my appearance, or who I am. I’m tired of losing people, tired of opening up to people that don’t care, and I’m so damn tired of letting […]

Continue Reading

6/29/2015 2 comments

0 Email

So Hard Not to Slosh Around in Self-pity

by almo lothar 6/29/2015

written by almo lothar

I’m about to turn 64.

I worked hard through my professional life to put my son, daughter and nephew through good schools and university and my wife through law school. In 1995, I started my own business in California.

I had some welcome success, putting aside a comfortable nest egg which I thought would carry me through however much time I had left. I was wrong. All the nest egg did was attract the attention of circling sharks.

Beginning in 2008, I made some business decisions which, over the course of the next five years, would cost me virtually everything. A former partner, my personal attorney and an […]

Continue Reading

6/29/2015 4 comments

0 Email

Am I Crazy?

by zombiedoctor 6/28/2015

written by zombiedoctor

So let me just throw this out there.
I’m not suicidal but I have a chronic and, apparently, incurable illness that over the last 8 years has lowered my quality of life to almost comically unbearable levels. There are certainly days when I think, “so how long do you think you can endure this before jumping out of a fucking window?”
Let’s get real here – if you were an American being held prisoner by ISIS (or, for that matter, a suspected Muslim terrorist being held at a black site by the CIA) and tortured sadistically and de-humanized every day and was reasonably sure that […]

Continue Reading

6/28/2015 2 comments

0 Email

Considering euthanasia

by Clare 6/28/2015

written by Clare

I had no idea there were places were I could write about the possibility of killing my self.

I am just tired of life. I have struggled my entire life to try and find meaning and direction and a path for me to follow but I have never been successful.

I suppose I have done a few things, had a few jobs, bought a couple of houses, had a few relationships and so on, like most people, but I have felt empty pretty much my whole life.

I just don’t and cannot see the reason to be alive. I use the usual distractions that I guess most people […]

Continue Reading

6/28/2015 9 comments

0 Email

Newer Posts

Older Posts