Can I stop hurting? Feeling like a shitty human being? Because I don’t live life in the most absolutely best way possible. I don’t want to believe in GOD because I don’t want to feel like shit about myself every single day. Because I sin and I don’t want to change that, and I don’t want to hate myself for not wanting to change it. But either way it goes the truth is I don’t accept myself and I put myself down because the things I do and enjoy are sins. Cursing, drinking, smoking, disliking people, pre marital sex, all these trivial things. Why can’t […]
Tag:
life
Have you learnt some pivotal life skills from a relative or older friend?
Has a friend or family member taught you some life skills that you swear by now?
Have you learnt some life skills over time as a result of harsh life experience?
Your contribution could be the one thing someone needs to hear to prevent the thought of self harm and maybe lift them from their depression.
I take people by face value, I never trust the testimony of others when determining an opinion on someone. I’ll listen and respect their comment, but at the end of the day, I’ll make my own decisions on who is […]
there comes a time when the people around you, are like, “enough already”… they may not say it to your face but you can tell that part of them wishes you would just go away.
that time has come and gone for me. its been 5 years.
and now, here i am- living alone again- waking up everyday to the harsh reality that it is my real life that is the nightmare, while tidbits of sleep offer my only sense of relief
it is beyond reason to struggle to survive just to live a nightmare- there is no point in that, no quality to life
if i could just sleep- […]
i feel like such a whiner saying that, but still can’t stop feeling that way.
Humanity cannot be happy. The developed countries have higher suicide rates, possibly because humans have not adapted to life in the first world. For example, people chop down trees so they can wipe their asses. Surely, one would think that there would be consequences. First world countries have toilets filled with water, where there are other countries that are dry and impoverished. Many countries are rubbish, and other countries are busy making technologies that help destroy the planet just the same. The best way to be happy is to be an ignoramus, and even then, stupid people often tend to be emotional and violent.
I am a pessimist, I’ve always been that way ever since I can remember. I am that way because of my personal life experiences and some times its hard to look beyond that. How can I have hope that things will be better for me if in my life I’m only destined to reach a certain level of happiness. Maybe this doesn’t make any real sense but its what i’ve been thinking lately and how I kind of feel. I’m sad a lot, sadness that I haven’t felt for a long while. And it’s not over anything in particular really, I just feel sad and […]
I’m a loser , I am a loser in this cruel boring LIMITED real world , reality , real life
by niki
written by niki
I’m a loser , I am a loser in this cruel boring LIMITED real world , reality , real life .. !
I am a 33 years old Asian guy, who used to have so many beautiful hope & dreams ,
and many people have told me that I’m a smart, multi talent , very creative, & wise person
but now the more I see this cursed world, people, humans beings, and this reality, the more I lose hope in humanity , losing hope in human beings, and also lose hope in myself & my future
you see ,.. Reality / real world / real […]
An orange rots from the inside out. The outside may be in pristine condition, but upon cutting it open you may find nothing but mold.
Maybe that’s what’s been happening to my mind. My memory has been getting worse. My desire for life is diminishing even more, if that were possible. I’m starting to care less and less about the risk and consequence of my death. On the outside, however, I am as normal as can be to most people.
Yes, to most people. Other than the person who (sadly) saved me from death during my last attempt, most people involved had put it away, […]
I’d love to hear some real life experiences from folks who’ve called suicide hotlines…
How do they start off the conversation?
How do they continue it or keep you engaged (if they do)?
Have you ever called for a friend, and if so, what was that like?
This is mainly to get a quick sample of how people perceive them and whether they are seen as helpful, or not of much help….
Thanks for anything you may want to share.
In a world all our own
We ponder unknown things
Far above what was sown
We pull on the strings
Of fantasy and reality
To make ourselves kings
Until something breaks our vanity
A revelation appears
To shake our insanity
For delusion is our fuel
To escape from our fate
And when reality is cruel
We realize we are too late
Our lives were decided
On a long gone date
And for dreams we are chided
By truths awful hate
That my fantasies were the only thing left
And I lied:
About qualities of which I am bereft
And when the illusion died
I realized the theft
I’ve just been reading a post from about six months ago on here, and it saddens me how many users that commented on it no longer post on here.
I mean they could have turned their life around and maybe they not longer need a suicidal forum but I kind of suspect from the nature of their comments that they’re no longer with us.
What makes me even sadder is wondering who’ll still be here in six months. How many people I’ve spoken to on here on a daily basis for weeks will still be around.
I won’t be here in six months.
Every Tuesday I sit in a therapy office and get told that as long as I take my medicine and think of all the positives I will be, “okay.” Dr. Herr looked at me one day and asked me something I’ve never really thought about before and it completely shattered me..”when were you last happy, when have you felt ‘normal’?”…The last time I woke up and wasn’t terrified to get out of bed and wasn’t so nervous about life tumbling down around me that I had a panic attack, was when I was locked up in a Psych ward. I tried to drown myself in […]
I am a coward. I am weak. I am a dick. I am an asshole. I am a nobody. I am a wanna be. I am a disappointment. I am hopeless. I am useless. I am alone. I am not worthy of this life. I am nothing. I am just a person who tries to do good and become better and no one even notices it. Nobody cares and nobody has cared. I don’t belong. And lastly, I am going to commit suicide soon. I know I keep saying this but each post I make signifies how close I am to commiting suicide.
I feel like I’m all alone, and unable to meaningfully relate to others. I go to work, quiet and shy. I just can’t make jokes and get along like everyone else. I drag myself through life with little to no motivation.
Its like I have this abundance of emotion I can’t get out. I’m only 21 years old but I feel like I’m wasting away. I can’t say I really wanna die, or kill myself. I just wish I were never born. Just fade out of everyone’s memories and life.
I hate to talk to people because I’m afraid of judgement, or not explaining myself right. Mostly […]
I’m generally not one to post about my feelings and life goings-on here, but … I don’t know. I just feel the need, for whatever reason.
I’ve been feeling so … “blah,” lately. I wouldn’t call it a serious bout of depression by any means; I guess there are just a lot of things piling up and it has me down.
This is largely due to work. The past couple of months (and few days, honestly) have not been good. My employers seem to be doing everything in their power to piss me off, for whatever reason (one I can’t figure out considering I have been there for […]
so i didnt sleep last night
and i feel kinda energized
manic again i guess
talked to my friend online from egypt all morning
she’s fine she said just a agruement with her guy i heard
sounded more like fighting to me
but whatever.
i’m sure whenever i lay down and be still i’ll go to sleep
however i dont really feel like it.
i am curious about how long i can stay awake now
everytime i sleep i have wonderful sometimes scary dreams
i wish i could stay asleep for….ever though
but i guess being awake is a high too.
I remember when I first started posting here, I was lost, very depressed, and lonely. I always thought, “I am not going anywhere in life. I just want to turn 20, live on my own, and kill myself!” After being on here for a while I started to feel a bit happier, soon after I began therapy and started to fell more happy, more confident, less lonely, I started being more hopeful about the future and had plans for what I want to do. But here I am again, a few months later and I am back to being depressed, I have isolated myself and […]
It seems to me that more individuals should take part in the smoking of weed, chill the fuck out and try not to take this life too seriously!!! We are all gonna die sometime, like it or not!!!
im going to see my doctor soon that’s specifically for my anti-depressants. I started at 50mg then 75mg and I don’t think I can keep going on in life with out more. Yes I’m depending on medicine to help me but it hurts so much without it. it helps for a while then I just have to up the dosage. What am I suppose to do? I keep getting urges to cut and sometimes I fall in to them. How am I supposed to fight self hate and self harm at the same time??
I find every thing about life exhausting. The daily interactions with other people, all the expectations and obligations. Every aspect of living takes more effort than it is worth. The work the effort we have to put into this existence its just far more than we ever get out of it. I have this secret fantasy, of getting sent to prison on a life sentence. Where I get to serve out the whole sentence in solitary confinement. Just 24/7 locked in my little cell, never seeing anyone else. Just slide a meal tray through the door once or twice a day and leave me alone. […]