Tag:

living

less depressed, but still hate my life

by evildandelions 1/18/2016

written by evildandelions

I feel better (?) but I still hate my life. Why is it that I had a good life (for the last 3 years anyway) when depressed, but have a life I hate while less depressed? I wish my ex had the chance to know me like this, that I had a chance to feel less depressed and be happy with my life at the same time, even if it wasn’t for long. If only I had gotten treatment, real treatment, sooner- everything would be so different.

I am so lonely without my ex. I don’t feel like I’ll ever meet someone I love as much as her […]

1/18/2016 1 comment

Protected: All smiles :-)

by whiskered-fish 1/16/2016

written by whiskered-fish

There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.

1/16/2016 6 comments

zx

by Dungeon 1/14/2016

written by Dungeon

I never want to leave my house but I can’t stand being here. I am a living contradiction. I don’t know who I am anymore. I’m constantly dreaming that I get some lucky break and will be able to live my life one way or another but I’m not delusional, I obviously know that can’t and won’t happen. I know it’s my fault and I should’ve just done what needed to be done, but I don’t want to live in the first place the only reason I’m alive is so I don’t hurt my family. But now I’m just a disaster to them. I hate […]

1/14/2016 9 comments

Update

by beaGhost 1/12/2016

written by beaGhost

It’s been nagging at me lately, how I’ve been living my life. I’m unemployed, about to start a job that my sister essentially got for me (she’s perfect). Still living at home. Dating, for 3.5 years now, a guy who I’m not entirely sure about.

He broke up with me for a month or two at the end of the summer. It was sudden, and I was left without many of the answers i needed to move on. Why? What happened? Why now? I essentially segregated myself from the world. My family tried really hard to get me out of my room but I had found […]

1/12/2016 1 comment

House of awkward

by disgusting 1/10/2016

written by disgusting

Yeah, I’m still around. Don’t want to go back to another week of work. ugh. Well, just musing a lot about the $1.3 Billion powerball. I truly think whoever wins will get killed, most likely by the government because they won’t let some average schmuck walk away with that kind of money! I truly don’t think they would have that much come into contact with someone who’s not already in the 1%. We’re all outsiders, even the everyday yuppies you see out and about. We’re not allowed to have that money.
Anyway, even if I did win the lotto and lived to tell about it, things […]

1/10/2016 3 comments

Anyone here from Fenno-scandinavia?

by AleksiK18 1/8/2016

written by AleksiK18

Hey! Im a guy living in Finland, and asking, is there anyone here from Scandinavia or Finland who i could talk to?

Anyway…im ready to talk to just about anyone anywhere, if your interested.

I know a lot about suicide…both ethics and techniques. Ofcourse i dont want to give advice to anyone. Just talk…if anyone is interested.

If you want to talk, you can email me at Tomialatalo@inbox.com

1/8/2016 1 comment

Stuck

by headupunderdarkcloud 1/6/2016

written by headupunderdarkcloud

Man, how does it get like this? To the point where every time you think you’ve got the solution to better your situation, invest all the energy and time you feel you’ve got left into it, only to find it’s drug you further down and more stuck than you were before? Leaving you that much more used up and exhausted, immobile, paralyzed to make another move, fearing like before, the likelihood it’ll just sink you further down..

You feel like it’s a sick curse, like your life has already been written, unwittingly playing the unfortunate role of some tragedy stricken fictional character, only it’s not fiction. […]

1/6/2016 5 comments

Life is…

by bah 1/6/2016

written by bah

Life is depressing

Life is frustrating

Life is a lot of effort

Life is painful

Life is a lot of bills

…and never enough money

Life is one struggle after another after another

Life is full of bad people, greedy people, and people who will stab you in the back

Life is full of racists, bigots and sexists

Life is full of corruption

Life is unjust and unfair

Life is trying so hard and still getting nowhere

Life is cruel to those born in poverty, living in poverty, born with disabilities or those living with disabilities

Life is not a life when you have no energy to do anything

Life is not happy for god knows how many people

1/6/2016 9 comments

Memories

by DesolateScorpio 1/6/2016

written by DesolateScorpio

Your skin, it’s so soft.

Your muscles, firm.

The smile on your face when you look down on me,

Intoxicating.

Running my fingers over your features.

Feeling yours against mine.

Being with you all night.

Your shoulder the perfect pillow.

Clutching the tags you always wear.

It’s so odd, how the color of your eyes change.

I thought I would never see them again.

I have those memories, yet if I lost you…

My reason for living,

It would also perish.

1/6/2016 6 comments

Last Day Alive

by blackvoid13 1/4/2016

written by blackvoid13

I haven’t posted in a while, but last time I did I was contemplating on ending my existence. At the time I did not have a reliable method and decided to delay the process. I recently bought an illegal handgun and plan on taking my life tonight with one of the most lethal methods possible. If I do survive then I know I’m going to be suffering severe injuries and may end up worse than I am now, but I’m willing to take that risk. Everybody knows that guns and suicidal individuals don’t mix very well, but it’s only a matter of time before I […]

1/4/2016 8 comments

Ugh

by Dungeon 1/1/2016

written by Dungeon

I’m so tired , but sleeping makes me feel worse. Why do I even continue, I have nothing worth living for and even if I did , I’d still wouldn’t be able to do anything. I want to leave this prison I’ve made but I can’t, nor do I have anywhere to go. I feel so cold and hollow and tomorrow I’ll feel the same.

1/1/2016 0 comment

A purposeless life -_-

by Lawli 12/31/2015

written by Lawli

There’s not purpose in my fucking life so what the point in even living, it’s so lame, so boring. I don’t want to live another stupid year, kill me now.

12/31/2015 6 comments

Effort

by missredjuly 12/28/2015

written by missredjuly

For the past couple of months I’ve been contemplating what my next move should be. “Should I try to fix my life, or should I say fuck it and end it?” I’m still not sure what the best choice is, they both have their pros and cons. I think I’ll attempt to fix it in the next coming months. I’ll try to get a GED and I’ll put all of my effort into it. If I manage to fail then I’m done. That’s it. I’m not giving myself more than one chance to fix everything. I’ve already wasted too much time being nothing. Even if […]

12/28/2015 2 comments

Just when I thought it was supposed to get better

by SecondSon 12/26/2015

written by SecondSon

I’ve spent a year and a half helping my gf through her depression/anxiety/cutting/suicide thoughts, and I am supposed to start my master’s classes in March but somehow, my parents went from paying $50-60k a year to f-ing $150k!!! Like I get adding another person to the food bill makes it go up but adding my gf to food bill with my brother living off of his school loans, should not cost that fucking much. Like i’m glad i didn’t go to Hawaii or New York. I stayed and worked, but the company was nothing but sales and didn’t know consulting from their own assholes . […]

12/26/2015 1 comment

Cannot stand living.

by sadgirl101 12/25/2015

written by sadgirl101

I cannot believe how much my life has changed in 6 months. I loved life, had amazing friends, family, educational and social life. I have always had quite a hard family life where I have had to help care for members of the family doing this daily made me think I was a good person.

My life is so different now. A video of me has went viral. I was drunk and have absolutely no idea wat the content is but EVERYWHERE I go I get laughed at, made fun of and have comments shouted at me. I have left my job because the abuse I […]

12/25/2015 4 comments

by Mute_spectator_indian 12/21/2015

written by Mute_spectator_indian

I m 33, I dont have anything left that is necessary for living a life not in a economic sense!! I m on antidepressants, antianxiety medications for last eight years! Hardly any motivation left, almost 16 hrs sleeping.. I know I cannot kill myself.. Kind of a numb zombie!! I don’t have any future left!

12/21/2015 3 comments

Depression and Disability

by disgusting 12/20/2015

written by disgusting

I get a bit depressed any time I’m away from the other Buddhists. I mean, it’s exhausting for me mentally and physically to chant for 6 hours on Sundays. That was just today. Its normally 2 hours and even then I feel I’m about to pass out. My disabilities get in the way of everything in life. The worst part is when you’re poor, you can’t get anyone to say you’re disabled, because they don’t want you to get any benefits. A middle class or rich person who went through what I went through would have been handed a wheelchair from day 1. I was […]

12/20/2015 10 comments

A list of things I’m overthinking…

by Bri 12/19/2015

written by Bri

It’s literally 5am and here I lie in bed… Just overthinking. Not even music is helping clear it all away. Maybe if I write it down it’ll go away.

What am I even doing anymore? Seriously, what am I doing? I’m seventeen, I start college in the spring, I have to do the dishes before everyone wakes up… Sure that’s some things, but what do I need to do to make my life fulfilling? Is it just an endless cycle or is it really going to change some?
Why do people fall in love? I think I’ve ranted about this before on here, but seriously, why do […]

12/19/2015 8 comments

I realized….

by Azure11 12/14/2015

written by Azure11

I realized that I’m not living because I want to,or because I have hope that maybe tomorrow or a few days from now will be better….I’m only living because if I did kill myself it would make others lives worse,even though those lives I would be making worse by dieing are the same people who are making my life a living hell. I’m not here because I have hope or because I have a will to live….I’m just empty,but for some reason I still have to be here.

12/14/2015 0 comment

Weird kind of depression ?

by Lacalamity 12/8/2015

written by Lacalamity

It is like feeling bad for the world as a whole, all the suffering of the living in general, every time I look outside, the cycle of death and life but the mindless hate and agony we inflict on ourselves, humiliations, hatred, and I can just sit there and watch our forsaken world die.

I have lost hope, we don’t learn, and it seems like I could have done difference, but no, I am just a worthless person, sitting and looking

12/8/2015 9 comments

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