Hearts beats together as one
Brown eyes stare
Hand shivers at your embrane
Knees weaken
What, Why is this happen
Tears falls
A silent mumble
Falls slowly to the ground
Will you be there to lift me back up
No no you wont
These emotions, these feelings
Of solitude , of loneliness has overcome me
No clue nor understanding
What do you want of me
I am dead , cold ice cold
These emotions have caused murder
I died in solitude and alone
Hand-written 🙂
While loneliness is a major issue for me, it appears there are many others whose mindset is similar to mine, a desire to end it. While many of you are younger, and I am not, I seek someone to share one last road trip with. To the Lost Coast and Redwood forests of northern California. Starvation/dehydration will be my method. A few final days of music, nature, and a final enjoyable meal. I am not abusive or aggressive in any way, which is part of my problem, we meek and humble sorts just don’t function well in a dog-eat-dog world. […]
Life has often been compared to a free-flowing body of water, …a river if you may, but what can one do if they cannot go with the flow and do not know how to swim?
This is my situation right now, I feel like I am being stranded… drowned…. left behind by the world around me. By my few friends and family… I know that my lack of social skills and shyness have contributed to that, but still I try to get along with people. However, I am slowly losing hope.
I am a failure, I have not finished college, I have recently lost a job last year, and […]
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I’m sick of looking at myself in the mirror. I’m sick of my boyfriend looking at pictures of these perfect girls on his computer while I sit right next to him and soak in my self hatred. I wish I could be better I wish I didn’t have to make excuses for myself, I wish I had the strength to change. but instead I die inside everyday, as I pick myself apart bit by bit… I don’t even worry about the scars anymore, what’s the point. one of these days I’ll build up enough courage to pushthe razor a little deeper, then I’ll never […]
Hi,my name is George,im 23 and i will die soon.
I’ve been wanting for a while now to find a forum where i can share my story,i guess everybody that wants to die wants to share his story.
I’ve been battling with depression for almost 4 years now,and i’ve been planing for a while now how to die,i just want this life to be over,i feel i suffered enough and i just can’t take it anymore..the pain..the loneliness..the dissapointments,but most of all not having anyone to ask for help..having someone i can explain that im suffering and i need help.
I dont have much of a family,i’ve had […]
im a 24 year old college student and I think about killing myself a lot and I don’t want to think about that but i cant help it. I can honestly say with each day that goes by my will to live is less, and I think about killing myself more. I think about it a lot, especially right after I wake up and right before I fall asleep, but now recently these thoughts are becoming increasingly more abundant during the day as well. im constantly depressed life seems to be meaningless, hopeless, and even worst I feel so damn empty. I have zero motivation […]
My name is drew, i am 20 years old, and currently residing in a “suck you under” little town in texas. I grew up a happy child, played sports and had lots of friends. But were did it all go wrong? why do i have no friends? no family? no life? why is waking up a day to day challenge? i guess you could say im to chicken shit to kill myself. but the thought has passed my mind alot more than it should. i wish i could just leave this world behind….and no one would remember me. i see my life and friends […]
I accidentally slept for hours when I got home today and I didn’t wake up refreshed, I just woke up feeling numbly sad. Everything’s too quiet and this silence is too loud and I have no idea how to make it go away. My words aren’t working like they usually do and I can barely string a sentence together. It’s just that right now I’m too caught up in my loneliness and self loathing to think straight and I am scared and I want everything to end, so I’m just babbling on here until it maybe starts to go away. In Religious Studies today, my […]
It’s incredible to think that I have to stop here. But the pain is overwhelming. I am afraid of being alone. Too afraid. I have no family. I was abandoned by my parents when I was 6 and I never saw them again. Right now I have a GF who abuses me psychologically, she is a drug addict who cheats on me and I cannot leave her because I am too scared of being alone. Loneliness is my handicap and I can’t take it anymore. I have no self respect to say NO and way too much resentment towards her to be able to solve […]
I’ve been visiting this site for the past few days, and have been wondering why. Why am I here? Why am I reading other peoples’ stories? Do I want to post my story? Do I get some sort of kink out of the misery of others? Do I enjoy other peoples’ pain? Do I hope that I might be able to sympathize or empathize with them? Why? The reason I post this now is because I think I now know.
Is there anyone out there like me?
I’ve been wanting to die for six years now and have attempted suicide seventeen times, but that’s not want I […]
I ve tried hard to forget the fact that i am alone,i keep myself busy during the day with activities like reading,sleeping and browsing the net..but all this shit dont change nothing.cus the moment i step past that big iron gate to get to class,i begin to realise just how ugly and lonely my life is..my elder brother’s wife once told every one that i am a parasite.so i ve stopped asking anybody for financial help.i slowly fell from miserable into something worst.i am in college right now.and seeing my course mates happy,living the good life,going out for dates,using nice cars and phones.always reminds me […]
I’m so tired of crying myself to sleep every night. I wake up in the morning crying. When I actually make it into work I fight back the tears until I can no longer take it, at which point I go cry in the bathroom. I’m in college and when I’m at school I managed to keep it together as far as not crying but I don’t hear anything the teacher’s saying. My mind is a clouded mess. I can’t focus on anything school related. All I can focus on is holding the tears back or all the thoughts that are constantly bombarding my mind. […]
I cant bring myself to tell anyone. The one person i love enough to tell doesnt listen. Maybe he listens but doesnt want to know. I hate myself and the life i have. But its not a bad life which makes it so much worse. I have tried to kill myself by cutting when i was a preteen but was so chicken shit i only gave a little scratch. Then as i got older i turned to pills for the pain. Overdosing did nothing but send me off to fitfull bouts of bad dreams only to wake up with a pounding headache. As a side […]
Pain overriding any rational thoughts
only feeling what I want most not too
Churning in my stomach, and burning in my chest
How did this happen, I ask
Only to be reminded that there is no explanation
No concrete answer to the question I’m seeking
I just have to accept what is.
Accepting a reality of isolation, loneliness and solitude
Feeling imprisoned by my own being
Trapped in a world I can’t escape
Following me wherever I go.
My mind plagues my every thought
The inner bully condemning every part of me
Ruthless, harsh and callous
Never stopping with its relentless bashing.
Only sleep gives […]
hit me if you think it hurts
beat me if you think it works
ill be here when your done
and you’ll be where you passed out drunk
life continues it never ends
unless you take it with your own hands
is it ever a reason good enough
to walk away and throw your hands up
no one will ever understand
because your alone the last man to stand
please give me one reason just to go on
because in reality this is no fun
loneliness is my curse
if you get close ill hurt you worse
i don’t mean to be who i am
im […]
As a child growing up, my dad used to hit me and my brother. Alot. Hard as well. Whenever he got pissed, he would take anything he could find, pipes, sticks, even rulers. Then, he would tie us up and beat us. Sometimes, he would even take us out to a place to leave us there. But in the end, we always forgave him. Cuz he was our dad. After a while, he stopped beating us. But then, my uncle started taking an interest in me. I was 7 when he first molested me. It went on for 5 years. Somewhere in those 5 years, […]
It’s a strange feeling, to lay next to someone
someone who is wonderfully good to you
and instead of happiness
the thoughts that race through your head
are how much you miss someone else
and how you wish you’d rather die
because you won’t feel the warmth of being next to that someone else
again
In the dark of the night
hearing his breath in my ear
I tell myself to let the quiet hours wash away
to let slumber kill the loneliness
so that I may live another day
The drugs that I have been on for the past year are Effexor, Wellbutrin and Lamictal. The doctor told me they were antidepressants however I was always depressed. The only problem was that I never felt fully cured or happy. During the day or when I was around anyone I would always put on a happy face and joke with everyone so no one could see my pain, depression and loneliness. Everyone thought I was a happy-go-lucky guy. At times I almost convinced myself. What really made me realize that the Effexor and Wellbutrin were working to some extent was if I forgot to take […]
I’m 22 turning 23 this year. I should be over this and be able to handle things life throws at me. For the most part I can but lately, things have just been too much. Since young, I’ve been alone, left to fend for myself. My parents divorced when I was young and my mother got remarried when I was 11 to my stepfather. He wasn’t a bad person in general, it was just that I couldn’t live up to his standards. I be constantly called stupid, treated like I was worthless in the house and he and my mother would fight a lot of […]
When I came back from my adventures, I noticed several things. First, is that my dreams are over. Second, is that I can no longer connect with realities, be it people or environment. Third, is the realization of the harshness of the world we are living in. And lastly, is the realization how powerless my self is.
Realizing the dream world is over, I struggled to return to reality. But I noticed that I have no such reality to return to. Before, I’ve never even think about the future, I just lived for the moment, believing that one day I would get involved and drowned in […]
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