im only 11 and ive already had alot of suiside thoughts i feel useless to the world what the point of this everyone judges me and picks on me. resently my best friends mom died of colen cancer (RIP cythea curro) that brought me down i know if i comite suiside my bff will turn to it 2. im afraid of death, i never try and cut myself. my older brother is the worst, he tells me ill die a vergin he tells me ,”go to hell” “no one cares 4 u” he doesnt help. and just about a month ago my very 1st boyfriend […]
So I joined this website yesterday, as I lied in bed sobbing, wanting to disappear so badly. I wrote my first post, and what I wrote actually surprised myself. Before I posted I read a few other peoples… I wanted so badly to give each and every person posting a hug. I wanted to tell them they were loved and to make them choose to keep their lives… so I wrote about holding onto mine. The comments I got back, each and every one touched my heart. You guys inspired me to want to keep going, and to keep smiling along the way. Like I […]
Well today, the place that said they have a replacement for my broken flow gauge misunderstood me and did not have the right one.
So Tuesday (tomorrow?) I will have to drive 80 miles round trip to a place that I know has what I want. My cup runeth over.
For a brief moment I thought about just running away and driving to a warmer state. I could take the money I had put aside for my cremation and use it to rent a U-Haul type truck one-way. Well that sucked; it would cost me about $2000 and that does not include gas. That is $500 more […]
im alone. i want to be alone all the time now for reasons i do not know. i want a new life, one where i can start over. i want to end it all, more than anything. i dont think there is help for me out there. the fact is i dont want help. all the help theyre going to give me is pills. im tired of taking pills to make me happy. i should be able to be happy without taking any kind of pills. im uncommonly depressed. my friend and family stay away from me. they act as if i have some contagious […]
ok, So that guy started talking to me again last night, he wanted to do it again. But i made up excuses like i wanted to do but had other things to do and i had to go….
And then today on facebook, One of his friends who he told about our past actions asked me this….’answer this question honestly ok? ♥
 if i offered to shag you 😉 what would you say? ;)♥’. I couldnt believe it…. I feel so dirty and used.
And all of that just added to yesterday, my dad didnt even say […]
Consistent with my usual run of luck, I was laying out my gas-bag stuff and dropped my regulator/flow gauge and snapped off and broke my flow gauge. Since you cannot do the job correctly without it, now I have to go out hunting for one on Saturday. More frigging expense out of money I don’t have.
If it was not for bad luck, I would have no luck at all. :)Â <deep breath>
DR
this is what i sent to lauren earlier, it might not make much sense to your guys but its basically wha happened to me today….:/ <3
‘Ok…. So Mr Gregory tried to make me talk to Una when you left, I refused to step into her office, and then Lydia turned up…. I started to break down at this point. We all then went to sirs office and Miss Gentry was there, she said that if it was just about earlier then I should just go back to lesson, Lydia walked me to art and asked Miss Glover if she could take me to talk about […]
ok, so…. I’m depressed. Most of you know that….. I know how you people feel because I’m the same.
I just wanted to let you know that you are not alone, I want to believe that too so I know how hard it is….
If you want to vent or just talk, then email me. I like finding out about other peoples stories and situations….
So email me ?
EmoQueen221@live.co.uk
<3
ok….. Monday is only sixish days away… And I can’t wait.
People are trying to talk me out of it, they say that things will get better, but I don’t really believe them.
I just don’t want to leave behind on of my closest friends…Lauren. If you ever get to read this then just know that if I ever were to do something then its not your fault. ILoveYou.<3.
Please don't ever blame yourself….
I can't cope much longer, living this way…also I love you, Jayden…. You are the best nephew anybody could ever ask for…..<3
well the title says it all… today is a bad day for me….
its my ex boyfriend birthday, (hopefully everyone know already that we HAD to break up 🙁 )
2 weeks ago we broke up.
and if we were still together today would been 1 month,,
I’m just so lonely.. i would talk to the only person who actually can make me smile now a days, but sadly he is at school… i have finals this week so i get to take a test then go home….
i still don’t know what to do.. people say i should let go of my ex and move on… […]
Sorry for the explicit title…..
but that basically sums it up, last year i got into ‘Sexting’ which is gross, i know. i was pressured into by a guy who i thought was a friend, and after a while i started to fall for him, i loved it when he messaged me first and we once even stayed up until five in the morning….That changed amazingly quickly, one day we were doing our thing and the next he got a girlfriend. That hurt.
It fucked me up.a lot. i kinda feel that those past events helped me to become the person i am today.
I feel so dirty and […]
It has come to the point where I am about to give up! no one loves me or needs me! The one person I actually loved and thought loved me and cared, just leaves me 🙁 I was never meant to be here! never meant to live! I cant handle life anymore! It is bad enough! Being diagnosed with 2 types of cancer in 2 months and my half sister has cancer! I have no point in staying here, there is no reason to live through all this pain! My heart feels like it was punched and now its hurt, bleeding, and in pain in […]
Just got off of the phone to my dad, he thinks that I was just being lazy in my exam, and OCD is not an excuse for the fact that I only wrote three paragraphs….. I love him so much but he’s not very supportive…. I really want him to understand how hard it is….
I can’t help but think that I should have done it when I had the chance. I was on a field trip to Italy, and when we were shopping in sorrento, I noticed a metal fence blocking off a really low down bendy road, it was quite a long way down. […]
I am a 14 year old boy. I am in a town that is full of judgmental rednecks… my life feels like hell… i wake up, go to school, and pray i don’t have to go home. I have been dead on the inside for a year and a half.. before that i was half dead. i know  you dont care about me, but, why not talk bout my life
i play guitar. i usually play Dethklok, Bring me the horizon, ect.
I lost a girl a year and a half ago… yes, there is a connection.
i cut myself to see blood…. and i regret am proud of it.
i’m a virgin by choice. […]
Ok, so next week, I have two major exams. And I’m terrified. Sitting in the same place for at least an hour and a half with so many people surrounding and staring at me, OCD has just made it worse, what with fullstop routines and my fear of writing in pen, which I have to do for the exams. I obviously don’t want to fail but my mind is telling me that I will.
I know that I wont be able to use a pen.
I have also developed a major fear of death, which is weird for a suicidal person… I basically think about it all […]
….i wonder what if i OD on my happy pills/ anti-depressants if  i’ll die happy:) lets find out shall we! maybe i finally wont have to fake it HORRAY!! its about time im happy with something in my life….<—-or would i be happy with something in my death??….o well:)
Why do I still try? Everything I do is wrong, nothing is right! I hate my life, everyday I think god why am I still here! I would rather give my life to someone who deserves it, not me! I try following what my heart wants, I try thinking happy thoughts! That doesnt work :/ Why should I keep trying, no one cares about me! I think to my self, why was I ever born, why must I live the life I live! where I am depressed! Only one person makes me feel like I am special! He loves me and I love him! Sometimes […]
I attepted suicide when i had just turned 14 in september… i wrote a song called no regrets and sent it to the one person who has always been there for me. he cried and prayed for me all night.. i was pronounced dead at 3:16 am for a duration of alost 18 minutes, they were able to revive me. the doctors said it was a miracle i survived… and now everytime i say hey to my one friend he says hey my little miracle <3 sadly i still want to die.. but luckily he’s still there for me!!
MOLLY WOPPIT; I need to thank you for saying what you sai ” your too young to die stay with us we are listening” Made me feel better. This whole website does. And you gave me a sweet virtual hug soooo(((((((hug)))))))x3 i also want to thank everyone else for commented. All comments let me clear my mind just a little. I truly believe this hole in my heart will dissapear listening to you guys<3 great day so far !
December 26th 2004.. I lost one of my friends in the Tsunami… I miss her sooo much… And I love her soo badly….We were like sis… Love A! <3