I was born into this world because they wanted me.
They dont need me anymore.
I don’t really know what else i can do anymore. Cameron died almost exactly a year ago (September 8 2013) and I am STILL not over it. I’ve gone to all the groups, I’ve been hospitalized for PTSD, I’ve got a new boyfriend who treats me like gold, I go out, I don’t talk about it all the time anymore. What else can I do to make it feel better.
The thing you have to know is Cameron and I were very much in […]
DON’T YOU DARE
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJxgrSCZJ1s
Before you decide to take your life, imagine who will find you. Imagine them walking into a room, and seeing you just hanging there. Whether it be your little sister, little brother, mother, father, grandparents, a friend. Imagine what will happen when they find you. No, they will not say “Finally, they’re gone.†No, they will not say “I’m happy they did that.†No, they will not say “I never loved them anyways.†They will die. Their hearts will break. […]
Being happy occasionally is starting to be a part of my life. It’s hard to think last month I ended up in hospital after trying to kill myself. I overdosed on Paracetamol. It was incredibly painful and didn’t work. My little brother saw me in hospital. I wonder how he feels. I didn’t want him to be there. My dad brought him down. My mother and father are splitting up. I worry about my brother a lot. I broke up with my boyfriend who I had almost been dating a year. Now I’m scared to have another one again. I have some amazing […]
When I look forward and try to picture my future I see absolutely nothing. That petrifies me, that feeling of dread catches in my lungs and I don’t know what to do. How do I make it go away? Dear god I need something. The blade is not enough anymore, I love her, I always will, but it’s becoming dull. I fantasise about suicide, the how’s and when’s … pills or hang from a rope or a trip off a ledge, if you dare. I want more than anything to make it stop; I need it all to fucking stop. I have never attempted, I […]
I’ve had this saved for some time now. Realised from the moment I thought it that one day I would use it. My family, especially my parents, have the right to know why I decided to do the unthinkable. They have no idea I’ve been researching it for months. Devious really. This is a material world and I want out.
To My dear loving family
Forgive him all for what he’s done
A departed soul he has become
His pain and suffering so much so
He had no choice but to go
Young, loving and so very proud
But in the end was beaten by deaths dark […]
This poem was written by a fifteen-year-old boy, most likely
in the late 1960’s, two years before he committed suicide.
To Santa Claus and Little Sisters
Once,
On yellow paper, with green lines, he wrote a poem,
And called it “Chops”,
Because that was the name of his dog,
And that’s what it was all about.
And the teacher gave him an “A”
And a gold star,
And his mother hung it on the kitchen door,
And read it to all his aunts.
That was the year his sister was born,
With tiny toenails and no hair,
And Father Tracy took them to the zoo
And let […]
Yes. I’m a 16 year old girl. No.I don’t want to kill myself over a boy. Or a girl. Or a bully. Or drugs. Or any of the typical things i’ve seen so far on this site. I seriously don’t know what’s wrong with me. By all rights, i should be a happy kid. I have a good life, I’m smart, talented and funny. So why do I want to die? Why is it that I want nothing more than to not have to exist anymore? Let me tell you why.
My mother and father both had perfect SAT scores. My aunt is the head of […]
I want to know why my mother chose to keep me alive when I was born? Why did she give me two fuckwit siblings when she only wanted me to start with? She only had my two brothers because they wanted to come to life before me. And now that we’re grown up, they’ve got their own lives, everything they could have, before me.
I hate my two brothers. I wish they were both dead, I hate my Mum and I hate my Dad. My two brothers are fucking cunts, from their conception. I have been a fucking stupid loser from my conception. I want to […]
I’ve never been a person who believes in the supernatural but there’s one curse I truly believe in which is my own life, or should I say, my family and I. This is my first post on here so I’ll make this relatively brief but from my outlook my family is cursed and I’m the one worst off. Mother and father divorced at age 3/4, sister in foster care by age 8/9 after serious drug problems causing mental health issues. My mother and uncle dont talk to one another any more after my uncle decided to believe a bunch of lies his wife said about […]
so here i am on the internet rock bottom so to say… first of i am not from america or england so my english will be bad but i need to get this off my chest …
So where to start? the fact that every day i feel worthless a big fat loser with no future unworthy of love? or that almost every night before i go to bed i think on how where and when i could kill myself? oh and dont worry this isnt a sad story its freaking hilarius so lets start i have a decent life i mean shure i only have […]
Today I picked up a knife and stroked the edge of it. It cut a small line into my fingertip. I asked myself why did you just do that? I didn’t know. I’m not usually suicidal and I definitely do not want to be. My cousin took his own life and it wrecked my family, hurting everyone and separating his mother and father. I guess the reason why was because the past weeks have been rough. Family life is hard because there are few moments of peace and quiet. Everyone is so angry at one another and they yell at me. In school I struggled. […]
Ever since I was born life has never been easy for me.  My mother suffers from a mental Illness, my father was abusive and my uncles where thieves and drug dealers. I can’t remember back to when I was young, but I still have a few very vivid memories. When I was two one of my brothers and one of my sisters passed away. When I was three my mother and father split up.  My sister and 2 brothers and I got put into foster care only a year later. We moved on to abusive carers who beat us and punished us harshly. I remember being […]
uhm, I’m new to this sort of thing, so, Hello, I have been reading some entry’s today. What sparked my interest in finding this site is that my mother and father are giving me a hard time, my Grandfather died yesterday of a stroke and things before where quite good. Now all of a sudden my friends are leaving me alone, my mother is out to make my bedroom a prison for me and I have so much anger and hatered that I have been keeping in check for a long time.
Im 16 years old, the guy I liked has abandon me, my Grandfather is gone, all […]
Before you decide to take your life, imagine who will find you. Imagine them walking into a room, and seeing you just hanging there. Whether it be your little sister, little brother, mother father, grandparents, a friend. Imagine what will happen when they find you. No, they will not say “Finally, they’re gone.†No, they will not say “I’m happy they did that.†No, they will not say “I never loved them anyways.†They will die. Their hearts will break. They will hurt, more than you […]
DON’T END YOUR LIFE , DON’T GIVE UP , REACH OUT TO ME.
Before you decide to take your life, imagine who will find you. Imagine them walking into a room, and seeing you just hanging there. Whether it be your little sister, little brother, mother father, grandparents, a friend. Imagine what will happen when they find you. No, they will not say “Finally, they’re gone.†No, they will not say “I’m happy they did that.†No, they will not say “I never loved them […]
My name is rebecca taylor i am 16 and a sophmore in high school. I have put up with alot of things that most people dont know about me. so where should i begin? well i shall start where my whole life started falling apart. I was four years old at the time i was first raped! i remember this event to well i was asleep when a frind of the family came in my room and started touching me when i tried to scream he punched me in the head and knocked me unconcious. he continued to rape me untill i was seven. at […]
Why is it that ALL I feel is pain?
My days are always getting flooded full of rain.
I say this bathtub is blooded, watchin all this blood drip.
Just ONE more cut across maybe down both wrists.
My wish, is to be in my world.
This is the most I’ve ever bled, my brain is getting fed up with all this bull shit.
Maybe I should get a pistol and find that full clip.
Yeah!, I think that’ll work, but then again I want the pain to hurt. I like slow pain.
Just one more cut, I promise this is IT.
Where’s my pills […]
Wow, its been a long 35 years. This story started along time before I was born. Lets start with a US Marine who had one too many tours in vietnam, my mothers stepfather( my spelling is really bad sorry) Not sure if it ws the war or just an inate evil, the man that is still alive, did horrible things to my mother and my aunt. My mother and father were married in in the early 70s thing were great for both of them until 1980, my dad recked his truck on the way homefrom work, broke his neck, never walked again, full quad, they […]
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